zoo weekly
Flotsam & Jetsam
9:03AM Jess McGuire | More bad news for Austereo’s Kyle Sandilands and Jackie O – they’ve just topped classy lads magazine Zoo Weekly’s fourth annual 50 People We Hate list. Well, I suppose it’s bad news if they care about what Zoo Weekly thinks of them, which they probably don’t. Still, according to the list they’re more hated than Josef Fritzl. THE AUSTRIAN RAPIST DAD! More »
Kyle And Jackie O Top Zoo Weekly’s Hate List
9:03AM Jess McGuire | More bad news for Austereo’s Kyle Sandilands and Jackie O – they’ve just topped classy lads magazine Zoo Weekly’s fourth annual 50 People We Hate list. Well, I suppose it’s bad news if they care about what Zoo Weekly thinks of them, which they probably don’t. Still, according to the list they’re more hated than Josef Fritzl. THE AUSTRIAN RAPIST DAD! More » 
People
1:27PM Jess McGuire | It would be terrible of me to forget to mention on Defamer Australia the fact that a So You Think You Can Dance? contestant has been swept up in a sex scandal, if by sex you mean “vaguely racy pictures taken by the good folks at Zoo Weekly”. Which saucy jiving miss posed with her knockers out for a lads mag? Why, it’s self-professed angry cheerleader Penny Higgs!
Topless photos have emerged of So You Think You Can Dance favourite Penny Higgs. Producers of the series were shocked to learn Zoo Weekly magazine was set to publish revealing snaps of the contestant, one of which shows Higgs on all fours with nothing but bikini bottoms on.
The folks at So You Think You Can Dance are cool with it all, though. Really. More »
So You Think You Can Get Your Cans Out?
1:27PM Jess McGuire | It would be terrible of me to forget to mention on Defamer Australia the fact that a So You Think You Can Dance? contestant has been swept up in a sex scandal, if by sex you mean “vaguely racy pictures taken by the good folks at Zoo Weekly”. Which saucy jiving miss posed with her knockers out for a lads mag? Why, it’s self-professed angry cheerleader Penny Higgs!
Topless photos have emerged of So You Think You Can Dance favourite Penny Higgs. Producers of the series were shocked to learn Zoo Weekly magazine was set to publish revealing snaps of the contestant, one of which shows Higgs on all fours with nothing but bikini bottoms on.
The folks at So You Think You Can Dance are cool with it all, though. Really. More » Sonny Bill Williams Is The Most Evil Man Alive.
9:38AM Jess McGuire | REET REET REET! Slightly Delayed Newsdesk special report! I was quietly amused to see that those wacky folk at Zoo Weekly have decided that Sonny Bill Williams, the former star of the Canterbury Bulldogs rugby league team who recently packed his bags and ran off to France for a job where he’ll get paid loads more than he ever would’ve playing sport in Australia, is this year’s Top Villain.
And who did he beat? Well, 49 other horrible people. Including a mass murderer. But – and I say this with a great sense of perspective – ditching your team mates is heaps worse than anything a terrorist could do.
Rugby league deserter Sonny Bill Williams has edged out Bali bomber Amrozi to be named Australia’s most hated person in a notorious annual poll. Williams has topped men’s mag Zoo Weekly’s annual Top 50 People We Hate List, released today, The Courier-Mail reports.
More » Nice Cans, Roberta – But What Can You Tell Me About Safety?
11:16AM Jess McGuire | If you’ve been hankering to see Roberta Williams unleash her jugs on the public, then you’re in luck as the former wife of infamous imprisoned gangster and inexplicably popular Facebook identity Carl Williams has just opened her blouse for the lucky readers of Zoo Weekly.
Incidentally, I suspect most readers of Zoo wouldn’t know what to do with a real live girl if they managed to put away the tissues and lubricant long enough to actually get their hands on one, but what do I know? Perhaps they are dedicated, passionate love makers who aim only to please their ladyfriends in the bedroom and I shouldn’t condescendingly assume that a liking of Zoo Weekly automatically means they are somewhat sexually retarded? I shall ponder this dilemma in my “quiet time”…
Back to the article!
Shocking few other than her crime baron ex-husband Carl Williams, Roberta has un-zipped her tracksuit in the latest bid to cash in on her underworld infamy. Not surprisingly, the Zoo Weekly shoot and the accompanying A Current Affair behind-the-scenes segment, to air tonight, was brokered by 2Day FM shock jock Kyle Sandilands before Roberta split with his management company King Kyle last month.
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While the convicted drug dealer and mother-of-four thinks she looks “fantastic” in the shots, her ex-hubby apparently had his concerns. “He was shocked at first cos I’m a nerdy person. He didn’t think I’d do it,” she told the magazine.
You sure showed him, babe. Thanks Roberta – and Kyle Sandilands!
As you can see, the snaps of Roberta Williams are very sexy, almost dangerously so… something which may not actually be true (depending on your tastes) but does segue quite nicely into this story – Roberta’s also earning a buck or two dealing with safety!
Williams, her partner and three children will be flown to the Gold Coast for four days ahead of her appearance at a breakfast for the Foundation of Public Safety Professionals.
The organisation is made up of SES, ambulance and fire brigade officers from around Australia, except Victoria.
Foundation spokesman Kyle Watson said Williams had media experience and first-hand dealings with emergency services.
Wait, do they mean the police? Nice! More » 
Zoo Magazine In Being-Tools “Shock”
12:45PM Clem Bastow | Well, this is surprising news for a Monday! After pulling such witty publicity stunts as offering a reader a boob job and searching for the hottest feminist, Zoo Weekly have come up with another hilarious competition: win a divorce!
That’s right, as their website reads, “Tired of being shackled to the woman of your nightmares? Want to break free from the rut of married life? Then enter our Win a Divorce Competition!”
Here’s what editor Paul Merrill says:
“When a marriage fails it’s always sad but what’s even sadder is being stuck under the same roof as someone who’s shagged your best mate or something.
“This is hopefully going to encourage people to see the error of their ways and get out rather than put up with 40 years of misery.”
Asked if the competition could be viewed as encouraging divorce, Merrill said: “You’d have to be pretty nutty to enter a competition to win a divorce if you’re happily married.”
Oh, we get it – it’s a humanitarian effort! They’re trying to help these guys. How sensitive of them!
Call us cynics, but we’d hazard a guess that not only is a large slice of the Zoo readership probably unmarried, we suspect some of them may actually have never felt the touch of a female human! More » Zoo Weekly’s Hottest Babes For Radio
8:12AM Busty St Clair | Zoo Weekly is counting votes for Australia’s Hottest Radio Babes for 2007, with the title ripe for the picking now that reigning hottie Biance Dye is doing her best Maria Venuti impression. Going through the current Top Ten, we’re a bit confused as to the whereabouts of Jackie O. Not that we’re fans of the Jackster… but come on. Surely she rates higher than Fi Fi Box and Amber Petty? Speaking of Ms Amber “I Was Princess Mary’s Bridesmaid” Petty, we’re not sure how much time and a stint in the CIty of Churches has changed her, but the last time the Defamer operatives saw her in Sydney, she was looking rather skanky walking home from Randwick Racecourse with her shoes in one hand and a ciggie in the other, slurring her speech and swearing at passers by. But whatever, it’s Zoo Weekly for Christs sake. Skanky blondes with bad manners are perfectly within their readers’ reach, no? More »
Big Brother’s Emma To Get Her Kit Off
6:39PM Jess McGuire | There’s really only one way to get through the grieving process, we hear, and that’s to turn to the caring counselling folk at Zoo Weekly.
There, through the magazine’s special and very public technique of asking probing analytical questions and taking tasteful photographs of norgs, someone like Big Brother’s Emma Cornell can truly process the veritable avalanche of emotions one would expect her to be experiencing now that she’s not only been evicted from the Dreamworld compound but discovered her estranged father’s passing.
Australia shared the painful story of her father’s death, now we’re about to be exposed to more of Big Brother evictee Emma Cornell.
Cornell has signed a modelling contract to pose for racy lads’ mag Zoo.
She and BB housemate Susannah Murray are set to follow in the high heels of Krystal Forscutt, who is a “columnist” for the boobs-and-all magazine.
More » 