william baker

Kylie Promises To (Perhaps, If She Can, Maybe, At Some Point) Bring Her Tour Down Under; Defamer Australia Prepares A Skinny Latte With “Not Much Milk” In Gleeful Anticipation

1:45PM Jess McGuire | Praise the gods, Our Kylie is coming home! Well, sure… technically she’s already been home, scoffing blueberry pancakes, downing skinny lattes, and frightening cafe staff with her ultra-blonde locks. But it looks like she’s definitely considering, if everything works out okay, no concrete dates but it’s on the cards bringing her tour to the Antipodes! Pop princess Kylie Minogue says she is planning to bring her new live show to Australia as soon as possible, but has no firm dates yet The singer would bring her show, KylieX2008, home to Australia “as soon as I can”, she said on Channel 7’s Sunrise program today. “I know it hasn’t been announced here yet,” Minogue said. “I just want to have in my head more solidly what the tour will be and if I can manage what I’ve planned so far. “Of course I would love to come back here. We are plotting and planning right now.” Wonderful news. No doubt the “we” bit refers to her and her gay husband/stylist/whatevs Will Baker, which means we’ll probably find out Kylie’s tour agenda quite shortly due to Mr Baker being snapped by paparazzi holding a large envelope with a To Do list made up of things like “FIND TINY SHINY PANTS FOR THE MISSUS”, “BUY MORE BETTY CROCKER BLUEBERRY PANCAKE MIX”, and “BOOK TICKETS TO AUSTRALIA FOR AUGUST 17TH 2008″ scribbled on it in large, easily photographed font. Also, we rather enjoyed this bit of the story. The former Neighbours star was honoured with an OBE in the Queen’s New Year Honours List in late December, before ringing in 2008 by singing a sexy duet with Paul McCartney. Minogue said her family were more impressed by the OBE, but admitted sharing the stage with “Macca” came a close second. “What a thrill to perform with him,” she said. “I was just going, `legend’.” Ha! How very ocker of her. “I was just going, ‘legend’.” indeed! Why not just say “I was like, fuck – this is tops, ay?” and get it over with? Adorable. More »

Kylie Needs To Tell William Baker That Loose Lips Sink Ships

10:08AM Clem Bastow | Before Our Kylie could even get the words out, Her William Baker has been blabbing about the pop princess’ rumoured world tour, which now looks set to be a 40th birthday celebration of sorts. Are we the only ones who wish Baker would stop pitching himself as her personal channeller and instead be content to play the Ken Paves role? The Australian pop princess, who will celebrate the milestone on May 28, is working with friend and stylist William Baker on ideas for the tour, Britain’s The Sun newspaper reported today. “I’m heading back into the studio with Kylie in February to start training for the tour we want to do in June,” the tabloid quoted Baker as saying after the London premiere of a documentary about Minogue titled White Diamond. And was it his idea to dress her up as a drag queen in that official camera? Is it William Baker who keeps feeding stories to the tabloids about Kylie’s many new hairstyles? Did he pick that dress she wore to the White Diamond premiere? The man must be stopped! More »

Kylie Enlists The Gays To Make New Video “More Authentic”

11:50AM Clem Bastow | Taking a break from her hectic hairdressing schedule, Our Kylie is busy filming videos for her upcoming album, with single Two Hearts (which isn’t, sadly, a trance-pop remix of the John Farnham song of the not-quite-same name) the first to get the treatment. And according to this saliva-soaked account by an “insider” in the Mirror, it’s totally HOT, in a gay kind of way. “Kylie vamps it up in a black latex catsuit that’s so tight and figurehugging, you can clearly see the shape of her bum. And it looks great. “Then she writhes on the floor provocatively and cavorts on a grand piano.” The new look comes after her stylist William Baker said it would be a good idea to make her new video “more authentic”. So, ever the professional, Kylie hit the the drag clubs with gusto – and instantly hit it off with queens Tasty Tim and Princess Julia. Wait, you mean that all the greased up blokes wearing short shorts and edgy William Baker creations in Kylie’s previous videos have been straight, and somehow less “authentic”? We’re frankly amazed she has the gall to even call herself a pink icon. More »