uma thurman
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9:13AM Jess McGuire | Remember when it seemed Shane Warne’s life had turned to rubbish? He’d finished up with test cricket, split from his wife, failed at quitting smoking – granted, these incidents aren’t in any kind of chronological order, but you get my point. But these days, Shane is a total success story. The subject of an acclaimed musical, he’s back with his missus, and Uma Thurman is coming to his birthday party. Wait, what? More »
Everything’s Coming Up Warney
9:13AM Jess McGuire | Remember when it seemed Shane Warne’s life had turned to rubbish? He’d finished up with test cricket, split from his wife, failed at quitting smoking – granted, these incidents aren’t in any kind of chronological order, but you get my point. But these days, Shane is a total success story. The subject of an acclaimed musical, he’s back with his missus, and Uma Thurman is coming to his birthday party. Wait, what? More » 
Flotsam & Jetsam
Don’t Say We’ve Never Said A Nice Thing About Tyler Perry
3:22AM Natasha VC | Uma Thurman, Nicholas Cage and Tyler Perry are all things that won’t win them automatic scorn. This is progress. Also, Martin Sheen may get the chance to be in charge of freedom again. Finally. More »
Flotsam & Jetsam
Mel Gibson Hoping You’ll Pay To Watch Him Talk To A Puppet
12:39AM Richard Lawson | Mel Gibson announces his next big movie role, and it’s a strange one. The Green Lantern movie narrows its potential leads down to three curious choices, and little beaver Jon Heder has landed a TV show on US cable. More »
Today in Sundance Hell: Blaxploitation Lives!
3:31AM STV | In the latest roundup of news from the frozen, overcaffeinated Park City frontier, Sony bets on black, Ashton Kutcher gets it on (and on) and Uma Thurman revolutionises Sundance fitness. More »
Umastalker Found Guilty Of Umastalking
8:20AM Seth | Jack Jordan is the lovelorn and deeply misunderstood man currently on trial for having developed—and who hasn’t!—an irrationally obsessive crush on screen siren Uma Thurman. This in turn led him to perform such deeply unsettling, yet oddly touching, gestures as presenting Thurman with samples of his own stick-figure art—which we’ve reproduced according to trial testimony’s exacting specifications. The AP now reports that a jury has found Jordan guilty. The conviction—one count of stalking and one count of aggravated harassment—means Jordan could face up to one year in jail. More »
Uma Thurman’s ‘Happy Stalked Actress Day’ Card: A Defamer Recreation
9:42AM Seth | After reading the vivid description of a greeting card plucked from the “Friendship – Stalked Actress” section of his local Hallmark store and presented by noted creep Jack Jordan to Uma Thurman on the steps of her My Super Ex-Girlfriend trailer, all we wanted was to catch a glimpse of the heavily-doodled correspondence. Sadly, none seemed to exist. No matter: We simply asked the talented team over at Defamer’s Evidence-Recreation Dept. to whip us up this stunning facsimile, based upon Thurman’s detailed testimony. We think you’ll find it a satisfactory approximation of the original, down to the last ACME razor blade and “tee-hee.” Uma Thurman’s Stalker Wooed Her With Doodled Harbingers Of Stick-Figure Doom [Defamer] More »
Uma Thurman’s Stalker Wooed Her With Doodled Harbingers Of Stick-Figure Doom
8:15AM Molly Friedman | It’s safe to say that every celebrity, even Artie Lange, has their fair share of fans with crushes on them. But when the celebrity in question happens to be the Amazonian Tarantino muse Uma Thurman, this group of lovey-dovey fans will naturally include at least a few nutcases. Enter Jack Jordan, the soft-spoken schizo whose stalking enterprise we filled you in on earlier this week. But today, on the third day of his trial in New York, the actress finally took the stand herself to deliver her testimony. As the NY Times reports, Thurman began by describing a card Jordan had delivered to her trailer while she was filming My Super Ex-Girlfriend: On the front was a dreamy pastel store-bought image of a small blonde girl, a spray of pink flowers and a dove…On the back was a crude pen and ink drawing of a male stick figure walking off the edge of an Acme razor blade into an open grave. But Jordan’s doodles came with thought balloons! And fragmented romantic dialogue! More after the jump: More »
Lawyer Outlines Fine Difference Between Obsessed Creep And Stalker In Uma Thurman Harassment Trial
8:50AM Seth | As any celebrity knows, the lines dividing fan, superfan, stalker, and murderous stalker are often blurred; one day, you’re receiving innocent, screwdriver-and-rock-filled gift bags, card attached reading, “Oh yes, we will be together, you and I. Mark my words,” the next you’re frantically dialling 911 to report the machete-wielding maniac standing over your bed and screaming something about never having received a thank-you note. Extreme Uma Thurman-enthusiast Jack Jordan, for example—currently on trial for having harassed the actress and her family obsessively for two years—isn’t a stalker at all, his lawyer argues. He’s merely your garden variety creep: Jordan, 37, is accused of sending harassing e-mails to Thurman’s father and brother, loitering for hours on the steps of Thurman’s Manhattan apartment and visiting her trailer on a movie set. More »
Terse Uma Thurman Wilts Under David Letterman’s Cross-Examination
2:35AM Defamer Hollywood | As far as directionless conversations with aloof, quasi-paranoid movie stars go, David Letterman’s interview last night with Uma Thurman went about as well as could be expected. Perhaps retaining the slightest of old Oprah-Uma Oscar grudges toward our favourite joke-recycling late-night icon, Thurman deflects an odd series of inquiries about her country home for a full minute before anything resembling a punchline arrives. It could be a Pellicano trial reenactment as much as an affected celebrity sit-down, or perhaps just uncannily close to a conversation Thurman had earlier in the day with ex-husband Ethan Hawke. We knew Dave likes the studio cold, but watch after the jump and tell us if this isn’t a bit much. [CBS] WATCH VIDEO More »
Uh Oh, Tiger Lily (Maybe) Set To Become Child Actor
11:05AM Clem Bastow | This could well constitute “troubling news”: Tiger Lily, daughter of Michael Hutchence and Paula Yates and adopted daughter of Sir Bob Geldof, has apparently made a shortlist of young actresses in line to star in the latest cinematic adaptation of the popular Eloise books.
Even though being a child actor isn’t necessarily the curse it once was, here’s hoping Tiger Lily is from the Frances Bean Cobain school rather than the Drew Barrymore-aged-8-to-16 school, and has only inherited her parents’ looks rather than their party MO.
Tiger Lily and 10 other young actresses were shortlisted after the movie’s producers scoured schools in Britain, the US and Canada.
Hollywood actress Uma Thurman has already been cast to play the nanny in the film.
“Eloise has to be sassy, streetwise and extremely lovable, although she has a naughty side,” an unnamed source close to the film told the Daily Mail newspaper.
Final auditions for the starring role will be held next week, the paper added.
Eloise in Paris is based on the famous 50s children’s books by Kay Thompson.
Casting Tiger Lily in the role would be an improvement on the dreadful existing film and TV versions of the character, but we’ll believe all this when we actually see proper quotes rather than just “sources”.
In any case, we can’t see Sir Bob letting Tiger Lily hit Studio 54 for her 12th birthday – if his other daughters are any indication, that sort of shit is strictly for those aged 15 and above. More » 