trashtastic

Amy Winehouse Round-Up: Would You Give This Woman A Hotel Room?

12:31PM Clem Bastow | In an incredibly original move for a troubled musician in the grips of fame and substance issues, it appears Amy Winehouse – who has been staying in a hotel since leaving rehab, presumably since her house is full of drugs triggers – has taken to making a mess in her hotel room. She stopped short of tossing the television set out the window, but we were quietly amused by the inventory of crap that housekeeping found in her five-star accommodation when she nicked out to the Brit Awards: Booze was spilled all over the wooden hallway and cigarette butts, countless bottles of champagne and unwashed knickers were all over the floor. The blackened bath had to be scrubbed and unclogged after she dyed and washed her famous beehive in the tub. She had even taken a large mirror off the wall and placed it on the floor. Staff were baffled why. I’m not. A source for the Riverbank Plaza Hotel on the Albert Embankment revealed: “It was carnage.” We would wag our fingers at Winegums if the list of detritus found about her room didn’t so closely resemble our own bedroom/living room/bathroom/kitchen… You know, apart from the unwashed undies; that’s just taking it all a step too far. More »

Paris To Meet The Freak In West End Lesbian Romp Shocker

9:39AM Clem Bastow | When we read this particular piece this morning we were fairly clapping our hands with demented glee – Paris Hilton is allegedly being offered a role in the West End theatrical production of… Prisoner: Cell Block H! Now, there’s trash, and there’s Trash™, Paris Hilton starring in a musical revamp of Prisoner, in which she will take part in a “lesbian romp” is pretty much the best news of the year. However, we particularly enjoyed the way that story managed to get a sly boot into Paris in its final moments: The source added: “Paris is keen to stretch herself as an actress so she’s happy to kiss another girl for the audience and actually thinks it’ll be fun to play a lesbian. “She’ll also get to stretch her vocal chords and she loves that.” If Paris does appear in the West End it will be just the latest addition to her growing list of talents. If you are curious as to just what entails a “list of talents”, they then go on to remind us that Paris has “appeared in an adult film”. LOLCATS! More »