· Defamer Decides 2008 followed the DNC travails of Anne Hathaway, Charlize Theron, Steven Spielberg, and poker-playing Ben Affleck.
· Jon Cryer, though? Not so much. He'll get back to us about that.
· Viggo Mortensen and Kate Winslet were the prom king and queen of early Oscar hype.
· Our 90210 anticipation runneth over. And over.
· Kirsten and Justin paid a visit to Sunset Junction.
· Just so it's clear, Tom Cruise is not on the hook for Valkyrie's injured Nazi extras.
· Fitness goddess Jane Fonda saved us from the leotarded specter of Heidi Montag.
· To which the bank-bound, White House-minded Heidi naturally replied, "Who's Jane Fonda?"
· Steve Coogan and Rainn Wilson dared to voyage to the bottom of the summer box-office.
· American Idol added a fourth judge to break those occasional ties that occur when Paula falls asleep.
· Nikki Finke said MGM's for sale. Sharon Waxman denied it. It's on!
· Righteous Kill was a minimum of five poster tweaks away from us even thinking about watching it.
· Webphobe Aaron Sorkin momentously joined Facebook.
· Smackenzie Phillips and Andy Dick found dignity behind bars.
· And finally, Don Draper's feed followers have almost doubled in the four days since Mad Men TwitterGate. We're just saying.

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·It's never too late to wish Manoj a happy 38th birthday!
·Bomb and anthrax threats temporarily made MGM Tower the baddest-arse studio HQ in town.
·A lucky Morgan Freeman escaped a serious car accident with only a broken marriage.
·Alas, Christina Applegate, Bernie Mac and a pair of SYTYCD finalists faced more dire diagnoses.
·Matthew McConaughey's breakthroughs in placenta husbandry narrowly edged Clay Aiken in the race for the title of Best New Daddy.
·Was TV's highest-paid star among those accidentally exposed by a clumsy Hollywood madam?
·It was a close call, but Shia's pinkie will pull through.
·Defamer's political bureau stayed busy with Gwyneth Paltrow, Paris Hilton and Scarlett Johansson.
·Behold! The Chosen Blobs!
·Pineapple Express started big and will end bigger — kind of like co-star James Franco, if you catch our drift.
·Tropic Thunder RetardGate came and went.
·Meanwhile, Robert Downey Jr. will answer your stupid fucking questions now, sir. Yours, too, Debbie Matenopoulos.
·Drink, Play, F@#K and Puke, Broke, AIDS supplanted The Hobbit as the planet's most anticipated two-fer.
·RIP Bernie Brillstein.

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· If it weren't for Dark Knight news, there wouldn't have been much news at all. After dispatching the Joker, Batman took on his toughest foe to date, the deranged Momzo The Clown (specialty: extortion). Batman denies all of the charges, which is just fine with new Oscar frontrunner Aaron Eckhart.
· NBC announced that Jay Leno will be abdicating his Tonight Show throne on May 29, 2009 while a disguised Jay Leno sat in the audience cracking wise. Meanwhile, Jimmy Fallon will be spinning his wheels online for a few months before they let him loose on air.
· Miley "Slut!" Cyrus took to the YouTubes to wage war on her new rival, Selena Gomez.
· If you come within 1,000 yards of Brangelina's test tube babies, Brad Pitt will beat you to a pulp.
· We finally learned what Judd Apatow's favourite season of The Wire was.
· Surfer dude Matthew McConaughey cashed a $3 million check from OK! for baby pictures of young prince Levi.
· Maybe it's just us, but Lyons & Mankiewicz doesn't quite have the same ring as Ebert & Roeper (let alone Siskel & Ebert).
· Cuts at Vantage and Netflix made it another tough week for indie film.
· Fer sure, fer sure, we counted down our favourite Valley Girls.
· Don't bother with MapQuest, NPH can tell you how to get, how to get to Sesame Street.
· And finally, the passing of Estelle Getty affected everyone, from teary YouTube eulogists to our own Molly McAleer. The saddest part? None of the Golden Girls made it to the funeral. Nevertheless, the memory of Sophia Petrillo will always live on.

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· Sacha Baron Cohen's Bruno exploits took him from Israel to Arkansas; his Sherlock Holmes adventures to come may or may not include the missus.
· AFTRA ratified its new contract, but SAG didn't let that spoil its appetite for destruction.
· Harvey Weinstein is now officially going door-to-door to finance his films. Psst! Buddy! Wanna buy a Tarantino?
· The TV Critics Association Press Tour is dead. Long live the TCA Press Tour!
· Lest major Dark Knight spoilers aren't up your alley, there's always Michael Bay's unproduced Awesome Knight screenplay to hold you over another week.
· After a long string of compatibility issues, Drew Barrymore is on the market for a Mac huckster upgrade.
· This Week In Magazine Cover Hell: Blake Lively gets the blown-out Skeletor treatment, while the pasty youths of Twilight make EW safe for chest hair.
· Here's the story of a lovely lady, who was bringing up three very lovely RRRAAALLLLPPPHHHHH
· Defamer's readers joined Matthew McConaughey in welcoming a bouncing Bongo Romcom to the world.
· Meanwhile in France, stinky, salmon-devouring, "high-maintenance beetch" Angelina Jolie prepared her post-twinbirth conditioning regimen. Two words: Hula hoop.
· Pick your reality TV poison for 2009: America's Greatest Dog or The Ashley Dupre Governor Boink Variety Hour.
· We wished a healthy recovery (literally) to the rat-friendly Newsroom Cafe, and bid a fond farewell to J-Lo's slice of Pasadena paradise, Madre's.

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· The Obscenity Trial of the Century is already living up to its name.
·Steven and Sylvester have a few words of support for quadruple-dipping Eddie Murphy.
· Shia LaBeouf is embroiled in an illegal, Five-Fingered Mexican Roulette scandal in which slurs are spoken
· The Happening is finally Happening!
· Leo DiCaprio has a biopic problem, as evidenced by a recent call with his agent that went something like, "And it's called Father of Pong, and I simply must make this movie!"
· Katherine Heigl isn't interested in your gold trinkets. Give her something she can sink her teeth into.
· We can't seem to get, nor do we want, confirmation of Paul Newman's lung cancer.
· Kit Kittredge: An American Girl preps girls early for a life of dressing up for a night of popcorn and consumption-porn.
· On Celebrity Rehab 2, Gary Busey will bring Jeff Conaway back from the brink. If Rodney King doesn't get there first. Dr. Drew, meanwhile, dances with the devil in the pale moonlight.
·Jackie Warner and Elizabeth Keener share the love that shall not speak its name, unless you're making out at a gay pride parade. Then it speaks it really loudly.
·Thanks to a pushy message-board-nerd and extra, Transformers 2's "Oblivous Hamburger-Eating Man" might never make it to the final cut. Damn you, pushy message-board nerd!
·Forbes' Celebrity 100: The haves and have-nots.
·It's Smurf vs. Smurf in the World Series of Smurfs.
· We give up, Debra Winger? What did make that kid burst into tears in Terms of Endearment?
· Jessica Alba and Cash Warren are parents! Of a girl! A girl baby!
· Starz celebrates the awfulness that is I Know Who Killed Me.

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· Upfront Week had something to underwhelm everyone: ABC's travelling game shows. FOX's mysterious smoke-ring people. CBS's contribution to the fat dad/hot wife sitcom genre, The CW's 90210. Who did we leave out? Oh yeah. Him.
· Defamer offers you a front row seat to us covering Cannes coverage in our underwear!
· Yo, Speed Racer: Eat Iron Man's iron shorts! Emile Hirsch burns rubber out of UTA.
· Is the final nail in Nailed's coffin? Yes! No! Yes! We don't know! Sooobbb.
· Few karaoke survivors following Fantasia's Idol bloodbath.
· Danny Glover fondly recalls taking fistfuls of psychedelics and fucking his brains out during the Summer of Love in a new VH1 doc.
· Don't believe everything Dolly Parton tells you about Burt Reynolds and Johnny Carson's double-teaming exploits. It's studio trickery!
· Here's what we know for sure about Sex and the Movie: Carrie shoves bread in her mouth while making the biggest announcement of her life. It's too long. And Sarah Jessica Parker's hat and hands freak us the fuck out.
· Megan Fox, as naked as you're likely to see her this week.
· Lindsay Lohan: The Lesbian Rumour Years. The tears! The hickeys!
· We're ever so slightly less concerned about Jennifer Aniston's fragile state of mind. For now at least.
· Brad Pitt's new tattoo is right above his coinslot.
· Defamer rides the specialvator to an SNL taping!
· Will you be my lawfully wedded Lamas, to have and to hold, so long as the cameras are still running? I do!
· Which reminds us! When are they going to have a gay Bachelor, already? (We mean, besides seasons 3 through 7.) Jodie Foster must have sure felt a rumbling on the horizon.
· Trampy Gwynnie Tosses Frocks
· It's like Annie Hall, but with more Scarlett-on-Penelope action.
· Simply, Shia.

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· Iron Man scores. Looking beneath the big guy's hood. Marvel's ready to make a movie out of anything they can slap a "Man" onto. Crushing Speed Racer into a little cube.
· Picturehouse and Warner Independent, they sleep with the indie fishes. We pick through the wreckage.
· Is Scientology® brand Baby Gruel hindering the development of Hollywood's next generation of disenturbulated superstars?
· Oh Wachowskiiiis...Come out, come out wherever you are!
· Who says Scarlett Johansson can't have it all? She owes it all to her five totally not-perving-on-her dads.
· Sumner Redstone extends a gilded olive branch to Tom Cruise.
· Susan Sarandon just gettin' by on biker tats and speed.
· Lindsay Lohan loses an $11,000 fur and a job in the span of one week, but neither were really hers to begin with.
· Twilight looks better than Lost Boys 2, but both could use a heavy dollop of Haim.
· If Barbara Walters thinks Oprah's heels are hard to maneuver, how did she handle the corset, Bunny ears, and tray?
· There's gold nuggets in them thar Hills!
· The wisdom of a John Cusack, Diablo Cody, or Bob Ross isn't all that different than you might think.
· Madonna is just another housewife who didn't figure out she's a lesbian until she hit her 50s.
· "And I'm proud to be an American/Where at least there's bikinis..."
· Gearing up for the Scheisse Video Trial of the Century.
· Team Taco Trucks!

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· Yo! Oscar! Over here! It's the 80th Annual Academy Awards Sunday evening, and good things invariably come in extremely round numbers. As is our custom, we'll be liveblogging the entire, bloated affair. Live! (Did we mention that already?) It promises to be four-plus hours of wildly inebriated fun. Be there: 5 p.m. Pacific. And if you can't spend it with us, then we hope you enjoy catching Hepatitis A at Madonna's. That should be a good time, too.
· Pop quiz: What do Lindsay Lohan, Marilyn Monroe, two boobs, and innumerable freckles have in common? Hint: Dina Lohan couldn't be prouder.
· What's with Where the Wild Things Are? Leaked screen tests. Poor audience responses. Possible plug pullings!
· For fans of Can't Stop the Music, and just about no one else: Steve Guttenberg to boogie back into your hearts on Dancing with the Stars.
· My dinner with Clooné.
· Scarlett and Natalie are willing to go there for Boleyn. But can the same be said for Christina and Reese?
· OMG! Hepatitis scare at Ashton's 30th birthday! We know...He's only 30!
· "Paging Dr. Pinsky. Dr. Pinsky to admissions."
· J-Lo's gemini miracle fails to enthrall a nation.
· Hobble your way to digital satellite clarity!
· The lavender Idol monster is back, dragging along some controversy and Apple riding piggyback.
· Put that broken heel under your pillow, and just maybe, Shoe Fairy Neil Patrick Harris with put a brand new pair of Louboutins under your pillow.

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· Sean Young: Drunk, and wanting Julian Schnabel to get on with it already. The Julie Chen version. The video. The rehab announcement.
· On the bed! On the floor! On a towel by the door! She's fucking Matt Damon!
· ET and The Insider compassionate Heath Ledger-next-to-some-drugs-video story kill. But do fellow stars deserve the credit?
· We got SAGgie Fever! Travolta's got Middle Earth Fever. Ryan Seacrest just has regular fever.
· What's Angelina hiding under that tent? Why's she just drinking water?? It's twins, silly! Yayyyyy!
· The Wolf Man loses a perfectionist, but does it gain a Ratner? Not necessarily.
· Another week of Britney insanity we can barely keep track of, so just click here.
· Tom Cruise and John Travolta nearly fall for the old Heath Ledger's Dad Needs a Plane Ticket to America swindle.
· Ryan Seacrest, sweaty teens, muscle suit, tennis ball cannon: Do the math.
· Stewie Griffin: Gay.
· Jessica Alba is damned if she's hot, damned if she's knocked up.
· Mr. Phil's image-rehab media tour.
· Celebrate Josh the only way Katherine Heigl knows how.
· Kirstie Alley is not amused, person making jokes about her Nicole Kidman's outfit at the back of Us Weekly!
· While you enjoy high blood alcohol levels and linebackers this weekend, your tweenage daughter will be enjoying Miley Cyrus in 3D.
· When 50 Cent Made Paris Cry: In words and pictures.

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· The Secret Tom Cruise Scientology Tape They Didn't Want You To See That You Ended Up Seeing A Lot Of Anyway

· Katie Holmes MarathonGate: Breathing not a word of it on GMA. Feeding Letterman the party line. Things get juicy: Who is runner #6074? And who is Paul Vincent? Probably not the final word on the matter.

· The rumors of a DGA deal were right on the money. The industry reacts.

· Breaking down the Sundance buzz. And a lost cat for good measure.

· Katherine Heigl refreshingly candid about how shitty the newlywed life can be.

· The Non-Globes: If you liveblog a non-event, does it make a sound? "Sooo...I understand you worked at Hooter's. How humiliated are you by that?" The Piv cements his place in catchphrase-coining history. Kicking it, Borgnine style. Stanko ratings. Night of 1000 hotel room viewing parties. Blonskysplosion!

· Following the Axium embezzlement paper trail.

· OMG! Diane Keaton said "fucking" on GMA!

· NodorO™: Manly, yes, but Simon Cowell likes it too!

· Wesley Snipes Goodbye, Brad.

· Nothing can cancel Oscar Christmas. Look at the sparkly lights!

· A ho-hum, heavy-on-the-freak season of Idol begins: Hairkinis, father/son love lockets.

· Defamer attends the Cloverfield premiere, sees a headless Lady Liberty and a headed Lady Lohan.

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