Until this week, it was taken as gospel that everything touched by peripatetic partners Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt would turn to gold; in fact, newsstand operators were ordered to wear sunglasses when the two released pictures of their Chosen Twins to People, so bright was the babies' gilded glow. Sadly, it looks like the exclusive that People paid so heavily for has resulted in a newsstand baby bump that was significantly less than they'd projected. Says Cover Awards:

Read More »

Only when we accidentally stumble upon Ted Casablancas and his long-winded, sinewy blind items do we realise how sorely we've missed them. The painfully obvious hints, the ridiculous nicknames - and today, one of the first blind items we've read in a while that doesn't out any closeted actors:

Read More »

Just in case you haven't already sunk into a envy-induced stupor reading story after story on how much cash Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are spending on the Chosen Two, the NY Daily News chimes in today to ensure you finally succumb to full-fledged depression. On top of the reported $20 million the pair is spending on French villas, armed cars, and getaway helicopters, not to mention Brad's uber-modern shopping spree on oddly shaped furnishings for said villas, the king and queen of Wombwatch Central are finally getting around to the nursery. And this is not just any other nursery — need we remind you, this haven will serve to protect the most important little girls ever born. And from the sound of it, Brangelina are well aware of this. The breakdown, including how much more dough these brats-to be are costing the pair via newborn necessities like chandeliers and cashmere toys, after the jump.

Read More »

In case you hadn't heard, Europe is expensive. Coffee costs five bucks, the dollar is like a penny, and it takes a lot of money to look as cheap as Victoria Beckham. And apparently, having a kid over there will set you back about $10 million. That is, if you're Angelina Jolie and you're giving birth to the world's most important children, The Chosen Two. According to Life & Style, Brad and Angie are set to push out their newest soccer team members in France, where they'll spend up to $20 million dollars on "birthing costs," including every new mom's standard requirements like helicopters, villas on the Riviera, and a fleet of nine cars. The full breakdown on just how expensive it is to have a kid when you're Brangelina, after the jump.

Read More »

It may not contain that promised footage of Angelina Jolie smoking heroin, but the rumoured "drug tape" featuring the future mother-of-six has been released by a British tabloid. And while Jolie herself isn't filmed doing any drugs, she doesn't appear to need any, as she spends a good two minutes babbling about how S&M has spiritually changed her life. As her anonymous junkie friend casually smokes heroin next to her, Angelina talks nonstop as though the shady characters huddled nearby are licensed therapists. How seeing her baby lizard left in the sun changed her life, and why she is just so tired of explaining to people that sadomasochism is not just about accessories but about healing, after the jump.

Read More »

As we noted yesterday, Jack Black took the liberty of announcing that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are expecting twins during a pre-taped interview on The Today Show, which we all got to see for ourselves this morning. One would think Black's blooper would ruffle Jolie's feathers, but as this clip shows, Jolie handled the situation with breezy laughter and an amicable Oh Well! shrug. And as it turns out, Black wasn't the only Kung Fu Panda co-star to fill everyone in on The Chosen Two's glorious impending arrival. Once again for no apparent reason, fading funny man Dustin Hoffman decided to reveal the twins' due date during the same segment. When Brangelina is expecting and which nationality Jolie has selected for her next soccer team members, after the jump.

Read More »

Despite the fact that just about everyone and their favourite blog have known that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are expecting two Chosen Ones this time around, heroin dabbler-turned-UN Ambassador Jolie had yet to officially confirm the news. And until a Today Show interview taped today in Cannes, featuring Jolie and co-star Jack Black promoting their upcoming animated flick Kung Fu Panda, we're pretty sure the very pregnant actress would have kept her lips sealed until the day those magical spawns open their cherubic eyes for the first time. But thanks to an impromptu joke made by Black, Jolie was put on the spot, and clever Today host Natalie Morales took full advantage of it...

Read More »