shiloh jolie-pitt

Suri Cruise Escapes With Hard-Fought Victory in Hollywood Baby Power Rankings

6:01AM STV | Because no nursery is complete without a stack of aspirational tabloid fodder, the influence-gatherers at Forbes have revived their gloriously obscene annual survey of “Hollywood’s Hottest Tots.” And this year, after much plotting and Scientological back-room lobbying on her behalf, we’re thrilled to see 2007’s first runner-up Suri Cruise finally usurp Shiloh Jolie-Pitt in a bloody, Gerbers-smeared skirmish for top-toddler supremacy. And, “in a sinking economy,” the editors note competition is only going to get tougher from here: More »

The Cutthroat World Of Celebrity Toddler Fashion Just Got A Little More Fierce

7:25AM Molly Friedman | Poor little Vivienne Marcheline Jolie-Pitt. Not only does she face a future of scratch marks on her chubby cheeks wielded by notoriously jealous Zahara, but the female half of the Chosen Twins has to compete with older sister Shiloh for a spot on Hollywood’s Best Dressed Little Girls list. OK! has released their juvenile version of Mr. Blackwell’s annual rundown, awarding gold stars to everyone from newborn Harlow Madden, with her “mix between chic and rock,” to 2-year old Shiloh’s ability to “navigate the line between girly glam and tomboy cutting edge.” Yes, well done, Chosen One. What skill and grace it must take to lie back, spit up a few gaga goos, and wait for personal dresser Brad Pitt to equip you with a pricey new cashmere-and-diamond onesie. The rest of the list, including the mag’s pick for #1 most fashionable little doomed diva, after the jump.

9:50AM Molly Friedman | There’s no shortage of sleazy surprises in the world of baby picture pimping. Today, TMZ reports that soon-to-be-dad Matthew McConaughey and his model girlfriend Camila Alves have hired an actual agent to auction off photos of their upcoming newborn’s visage to the major glossies. And the “brand agent” in question, Todd Shemarya, has quite a record — he’s the man behind Brangelina’s record-setting deal with People, and Christina Aguilera’s far less pricey cover with the same weekly. As disturbed as we are that such a man exists, we’re more saddened to learn that former nude bongo player and hairy beach hippie McConaughey would cash in on his first kid. We’re actually starting to miss the hobo doing push-ups outside a trailer we’d grown accustomed to. Then again, the $1MM that he’s reportedly been offered by three separate spawn-obsessed mags can buy a lot of t-shirts. [a href=”http://www.tmz.com/2008/05/15/mcconna-spawn-to-bring-in-big-bucks/”>TMZ More »

9:50AM Molly Friedman | There’s no shortage of sleazy surprises in the world of baby picture pimping. Today, TMZ reports that soon-to-be-dad Matthew McConaughey and his model girlfriend Camila Alves have hired an actual agent to auction off photos of their upcoming newborn’s visage to the major glossies. And the “brand agent” in question, Todd Shemarya, has quite a record — he’s the man behind Brangelina’s record-setting deal with People, and Christina Aguilera’s far less pricey cover with the same weekly. As disturbed as we are that such a man exists, we’re more saddened to learn that former nude bongo player and hairy beach hippie McConaughey would cash in on his first kid. We’re actually starting to miss the hobo doing push-ups outside a trailer we’d grown accustomed to. Then again, the $1MM that he’s reportedly been offered by three separate spawn-obsessed mags can buy a lot of t-shirts. [a href=”http://www.tmz.com/2008/05/15/mcconna-spawn-to-bring-in-big-bucks/”>TMZ More »

Lourdes Ciccone Leon Looks Less Like Madge, More Like That Other Celebrity Adoptress

10:05AM Molly Friedman | Until now, most onlookers have been noting just how much little Lourdes Ciccone Leon looks like her mother, the vitamin-injecting, leg-spreading Madonna. And while she does have her mom’s naturally dark hair and piercing eyes, we think the 12-year old mini-Madge looks much more like another pillow-lipped celebrity you may have heard of. Particularly when we place Lourdes’ current visage next to the star-in-question’s glamour shots when she was just a teenager herself:

Violent Outbreaks Occur Between Warring Factions Of Brangelina’s Brood

6:45AM Molly Friedman | We are shocked (shocked!) to hear this, but word on the street is that the lovely and ever-growing multicultural soccer team united by Brad and Angelina isn’t exactly getting along of late. According to Star, animosity and friction is growing among the four little Jolie-Pitts, with personalities growing bolder and fights getting messier. And, unsurprisingly, The Chosen One is allegedly on the brunt of most blows. Most disturbing of all? As a source claims, those cushy lips of hers are only getting bigger as a result of actual physical blows from her siblings: “[Zahara] once clawed Shiloh’s cheek after she tried to take her cookie…Angie gets worried when Shi plays with them…she always comes back with a scraped knee or a fat lip!” More »

‘Forbes’ Ranks Hollywood’s Most Powerful People In Nappies Who Aren’t Sumner Redstone

8:15AM Defamer Hollywood | Hot on the heels of their merciless takedown of Tinseltown’s most overpaid, the intrepid list-makers at Forbes are turning to the tots as they ask: Who’s really the most influential drooling, mute, self-soiling celebrity baby? Lest you think this is some sort of metaphor, let us present–Hollywood’s Most Influential Infants. You might think that ranking babies is too insane to be quantifiable, but rest assured that Forbes used an infallible algorithm in their computations: “To determine which tykes were tops, we looked at both Web presence and press clippings for more than 50 A-list offspring (5 years old and younger) over the course of a year. More »