Obviously getting cozy with Little Britain star David Walliams and Black Eyed Peas member Will.i.am in recent weeks isn't enough for Natalie Imbruglia. If tabloids are to be believed - and in my house, they always are - she's hooked up with yet another celebrity for a groping good time!

One woman's trash is another woman's treasure. Or so it seems with the latest on still single Aussie songbird Natalie Imbruglia's kiss list.

The Aussie singer and actress was spied snogging actress Sienna Miller's ex, the actor Rhys Ilfans, at the Atlantis Hotel opening in Dubai.

Rhys Ifans? Rhys Ifans? Really?

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Gangly Welsh "funny" man and most recently Sienna Miller's ex-fiance Rhys Ifans has traditionally been one of the blokes on Defamer Australia's "would love to get a beer with" list (alongside his female peers Charlotte Church, Tina Sparkle and Kiera Knightley).

However, I will be formally rescinding his membership after his latest "hilarious" gaffe: saying date rape is a-okay!

When asked by station Q Radio to describe a track by band the Gutter Twins the Welshman replied: 'It's kind of like being date raped, which I like.'

When the presenter asked whether date rape was a good thing he said: 'Well yeah, for guys.'

Graham Rhodes, spokesman for a the Roofie Foundation, a helpline for victims of drug-related date rape, said: 'If he wasn't to retract that, it would be nice for the 9,000 people who have been drug raped in the past 12 years.

'It shows a total lack of understanding and compassion for the issues.'

This is not the first time Ifans' sense of humour has been badly received.

Earlier this year he joked about paedophilia during a concert in aid of raising money to end child slavery and prostitution.

Oh, excellent work, Rhys. We're sure you'll be very happy with Kimberly Stewart, unless she decides she's not too keen on the idea of going out with a complete twonk who thinks it's lawltastic to make gags about rape. Onya!

Confession time: ever since she rescued Alfie: The Version Jude Law Wrecked from racking up Razzies with her sparkly hair and oddly transfixing "good naked" scenes, we've been a Sienna Miller fan. One of the few stars to design an actual wearable fashion line, a regular on nude beaches, not to mention her impressive performance in the neglected but excellent Interview, she's the kind of weird, devil-may-care actress we like. But our girl is in quite the pickle these days. With a loony ex-boyfriend sobbing over her in sappy love songs and telling her to "fuck off" in tabs, and a new set of her trademark topless pics featuring concrete evidence that she's screwing former heroin addict, richer-than-God oil heir, and married father of four Balthazar Getty, Sienna isn't exactly having the best month ever. However, it has been an NSFW one...

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It's taken them some time, but it looks like Rhys Ifans and Sienna Miller are finally engaged!

(And when we say "finally", it's only because in Hollywood, getting engaged at any point past the, say, three-month anniversary is like, totally taking it too slowly. And staying married for more than six months is a long haul worthy of a telegram from the Queen, or something.)

Who do we have to thank for distributing this happy news? Why, Ifans' mum, naturally!

Ifans' mum Beti-Wyn Evans revealed she's delighted at the prospect of having Miller as her daughter-in-law.

She said: "They adore each other and I am so pleased for them. They make a fantastic couple. We think she is lovely, absolutely fantastic."

No doubt this will be vindication to poor old Rhys, who was rather unfairly used to illustrate this Daily Mail story on beautiful women being more likely to have happy relationships with ugly men.

Come on, Rhys, ugly? We'd tap that, even in his grotty Reg Grundies from Notting Hill! Actually, come to think of it, especially in them...

By now we've established that Kate Moss is not much of a fan of Sienna Miller.

It was bad enough when Miller was Ms Jude Law and hovering on the outskirts of Moss' Primrose Hill set, then she became "the new Kate Moss" in the eyes of the fashion editors, and now she's dating Moss' old pal Rhys Ifans.

This, clearly, is enough to send any multi-millionaire supermodel tumbling over the edge in an apoplexy of Cosmopolitan Fashion Insider envy, as Sienna found out at a recent bash.

The catwalk beauty had a dramatic showdown with rival Sienna over the actress's relationship with the Welsh actor at soap star Davinia Taylor's 30th birthday party at The Colour Rooms, in east London, on Saturday.

Kate, 33, was overheard saying: "If you hurt Rhys, you'll have made an enemy for life. Treat him right and we'll leave you alone. But don't hurt him because we love him - and we always stick together."

This is a bit like that ad for dog food. Kate Moss is only little, but we think it's reasonable to assume that you wouldn't want to cross her.

Not only does she have an arsenal of sharp-heeled boots, she could always just get Pete Doherty to breathe on you - and no one wants to see that shit.

Poor Rhys Ifans. Apparently he's completely smitten with Sienna Miller and has been seeing her for some time, only to suffer the indignity of her refusal to acknowledge him as anything other than a "good friend" until very recently.

Well, as if that wasn't bad enough, now his apparent marriage proposal (which sounds like, er, a lot of work went into it, delivered as it was, set to music, rhyming, and partly in Welsh) was met with laughter from his starlet beloved.

Not only that, but the Welsh actor sang his ditty - titled Marry This Misfit (that's "Priodi'r dyn anweddus hwn" in his native tongue) - while strumming a guitar. Oh, and his ode contains the bizarre exclamation: "I bleed for you."

Charming! Someone call an ambulance... In fact, it was such an odd proposal that, at first, it went right over Sienna's head.

Our source reveals: "She fell about laughing, but soon realised Rhys was serious. While she didn't give him an answer straight away, she's since been thinking about it more and more."

Maybe Sienna just can't speak Welsh, and thought that he was singing Agadoo or something?