The News Ltd stable of newspapers loves nothing more than a rave, preferably an "illegal" one, to spice up their news coverage.

It means they can waffle on about ecstasies and "party drugs" and, as they did here, reporters can memorably quote forum members' reactions using only their screen-names ("Ralph Wiggum reported slabs of Smirnoff spirit-based drinks were selling for $240, and cans of spirits for $10") because they are too scared of "ravers" to actually find some in real life and interview them (you know, they might put drugs in your drink!).

So, we were pleased to see the latest installment in this fine tradition of journalistic excellence and moral guardianship:

Hundreds of "stupid" partygoers danced millimetres from death at an underground dance party held at the base of a seaside cliff in Sydney's east, police say.

...

Police Rescue Acting Sergeant Col Benton said it took two hours to evacuate 300 revellers over large slippery boulders and up one long ladder for their own safety. No one was injured.

...

"A number of the people were intoxicated in moderate to heavy states, both with alcohol and illegal drugs."

People at a rave were intoxicated? Good lord, these people are stupider than we first thought!

As one thread on dance forums InTheMix suggested, how about a rave at Herald Sun HQ?