paul reubens

Inside A Pee Wee-Starring ‘Happiness 2′ and a Peter Gallagher- Retaining ‘Center Stage 2′

4:50AM Defamer Hollywood | Undaunted by the poor reception accorded Hamlet 2, Hollywood is pressing on with two even more unlikely sequels: one likely to provoke an excited “Oh my gahhh!” the other, simply an “Oh my.” We’ll start with the latter: strange as it may seem, Variety reports that Todd Solondz is moving ahead with an “untitled part-sequel, part-companion piece” to his incredibly unsettling 1998 comedy Happiness. If the idea of a Happiness 2 makes you feel just this far from being completely hysterical 24 hours a day, why not meet its unlikely cast of Pee-Wee Herman, Demi Moore, and Emma Thompson! No, this is not a delayed April Fool’s Joke, and there is thus far no word on who will be masturbating on, near, or about whom, but the project will begin shooting this October in San Juan, Puerto Rico (naturally).

The Hoff Openly Horny For Male Britney Impersonator

9:00AM Seth | On America’s Got Talent last night, David Hasselhoff was refreshingly candid about the stirrings in his loins elicited by Drag Britney. [AGT] Step! Two, Three, Ball, Step, Ball, Reverse, Change! Watch out stars—Lance means business! [Mollygood] In this new promotional shot from Land of the Lost, Will Ferrell stands next to the kind of Sleestak you might imagine posing for pictures at Disneyland. [First Showing] Mmmm…Hannah Montana Sweet & Sour Gummi Cocks. [BWE.tv] And last but not least, it’s Paul Reubens’s birthday today. In his honour, enjoy the entire Pee-wee’s Playhouse Christmas Special. Happy birthday, Pee-wee! Mm…Birthday cakey. [YouTube, YouTube, YouTube, YouTube] More »

Short Ends: A Stocking Full Of Assorted Goodies For You

7:10AM Defamer Hollywood | As we gaze outside at the Bassett Hound literally taking a dump in the middle of the three-way intersection outside the window of Defamer HQ-2 (a Christmas miracle!), we think fondly of Defamer videographer Molly, who is away today. We therefore had no choice but to plunder from the tidily wrapped video gifts beneath the tree of our more affluent cousins over at Jezebel. Look, everyone! It’s Charo singing “Feliz Navidad” on the Pee-wee’s Playhouse Christmas Special! ‘Tis the season to be breathalyzered: In what is unlikely to be the last celeb DUI of the year, Boy Meets World’s Topanga was picked up for drunk driving. Still wracking your brains trying to come up for the perfect, last-minute present for the loved one who has everything? How about driving them insane with personalized postcards from an unsigned maniac in a tiny Polish village? Is it Christmas? What’s Jesus’s birthday without occasional Defamer guest-contributer Nick Malis’s musical ode to the loneliest holiday? We plan on spending our Christmas working on our Guitar Hero 3 game, though we have a ways to go until we even approach the insane skill-levels of Conrad the Great. Meanwhile, those of you who don’t find XMas 2008’s Most Wanted under your tree this year can still get in on the fun with Handbell Hero. Well, that’s it, everyone. True, we’re Jewish, but in the spirit of inclusionism, we’re out of here until Wednesday. All the best to you and yours. Chag Samayach! More »