parties

‘Vanity Fair’ Party Rises From The Dead, Looking Thinner

3:45AM Seth | Hollywood may never fully recover from the WGA-strike-plagued awards season of 2008, marred by trophy presentations on Veoh, a potluck Governor’s Ball, and—most shocking of all—the complete cancellation of the Vanity Fair party.

One Will Not Be Poppin’ Cristal Wit’ One’s Homies

9:32AM Clem Bastow | Given that she rocks tiaras and diamond knuckledusters like nobody’s business, flies private jets and has more houses than Oprah, we were quite touched to see that Queen Elizabeth II has decided to cancel her diamond wedding anniversary celebrations as she thought it would be a bit crass considering the rest of Britain is teetering on the brink of recession. Yes, despite that inscrutable smile and wave combination, and whatever the thinly-veiled truths of The Queen suggested, it appears Liz isn’t totally out of touch with her people after all. Guests at the party, which was due to be held at The Ritz this weekend, would have been served champagne from crystal-studded bottles and dined off tablecloths covered with sparkling jewels. But with her subjects facing rising bills and falling house prices, and the banking system paralysed by the so-called “credit crunch”, the Queen has decided that the celebration would be regarded as insensitive. Her highlighting of the dire state of the economy will not be welcomed by the Prime Minister, who faces daily reminders from his advisers that the electorate has lost the “feel-good” factor – and is punishing him for it in the opinion polls. The Queen had been due to mark the 60th anniversary of her marriage to the Duke of Edinburgh in the company of her children and 60 close friends. We were especially taken by the quote later in the piece, from a “close friend” (we love that the Queen has “close friends”; it’s easy to forget that under all the mink and ermine she is still, at least to some degree, a nanna), stating that “The Queen always puts her jollifications after everything else has been considered.” We love it! Try using it in a sentence today: We had quite a few “jollifications” this weekend just past, and are paying for it now. More »

The Biggest Laugh Facebook Has Given Us For Some Time

8:20AM Clem Bastow | Suffice to say that laughs have been a bit thin on the ground this past few weeks, so we were mightily pleased when the following item popped up in our Facebook News Feed, and had us laughing into next year: In case you missed the punchline, please let our art department’s technical wizardry explain the joke to you in a little more detail: Feel like organising a maxi-taxi to Narre for the night? Here are the deets! However, we assume “Da Partaaayy God” will be doing the right thing – a la “We’re having a 21st tonight and just wanted to let you know” – and calling the police in advance this time. More »

MySpacePartyTeenWhoCannotBeNamedForLegalReasonsWatch: MySpazz Party King Offered Promoter Job, Planning Another Kickarse Party In Two Weeks Time

9:08AM Jess McGuire | When will our fascination will [REDACTED] end? When the press stops covering the story, we suppose. The latest on the Narre Warren wonderboy, thanks to the Herald Sun. An unrepentant teenager who threw an out-of-control party at the weekend sparking a visit from the police air wing and dog squad says he will not change. [REDACTED], 16, had 500 people arrive at his house after an open invitation went out on MySpace, but is still planning another bash in two weeks. “I’ve always had a bit of an attitude,” [REDACTED] said. “I’m not going to change for anyone, really.” … “Yeah, it’s been pretty fun,” he told Channel Nine. “I’m having another big pary in two weeks. I don’t really want to (go home), I’m going out with my mates and stuff, and don’t want to go home.” And why would he, when he’s able to flaunt his brand new celebrity status at glamorous venues like Frankston Maccas? Brilliant. Party promoter Tim Sabre, of Raw Entertainment, has offered 16-year-old [REDACTED] a job with his events company as a party promoter. Mr Sabre told media outlets today that [REDACTED] had done “a great job in the wrong place” and tipped he could be successful promoting underage events. “A promoter who can organise a party for 500 people can make anywhere from $2000 to $10,000,” he sad. “If he can pull 500 to the street, he could easily fill up a club.” Ha! So not only is he rapidly becoming the world’s most famous obnoxious teen, he’s now going to score a sweet job for his efforts. There’s something quite brilliant about all this. “Erm…” – his parents & assorted outraged adults and media outlets Hush. Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re off to add him as a friend on MySpazz so we can find out the details regarding the next “best party ever”. More »

Gudinski’s Party Fails To Get Will.I.Am Retarded

9:25AM Clem Bastow | Our appreciation of Black Eyed Peas main man Will.I.Am has increased dramatically after we read today of his reaction to a VIP party thrown for the band (as well as pal and sometime collaborateur, Justin Timberlake) by Michael Gudinski: in short, he reckoned it sucked. And for once, that is the actual opinion of the man in question, not some subeditor tomfoolery or word-massaging by the gossip columns! Gudinski’s Frontier Touring had brought BEP to Sydders for a one-off gig to promote Pepsi, and chucked a Harbourside bash with guests including – and this must’ve really impressed the million-selling R&B crew – Marcia Hines and Jimmy Barnes. However, despite the world-class Harbour views, gourmet menu and A-list guest list, Black Eyed Peas frontman Will.I.Am couldn’t get it started, let alone “retarded” – yesterday, branding Gudinski’s no-expenses-spared bash a complete dud. “Man that party sucked,” he told a media gathering yesterday. “Justin’s a really good friend of ours and we thought that party was going to be wack but it totally sucked – I’m just being honest.” …Fergie attempted to smooth over her bandmate’s harsh criticism of the event, saying “but the beef was really good and the mushroom risotto was amazing”. HA HA! The vibe sucked and the party was non-existent, but the risotto was good! Well, that makes all the difference, and will now go into our vernacular as a shrugging “oh well” to be uttered after disastrous events. For example: “The crash of the Hindenburg was awful, but the mushroom risotto was amazing.” More »

The ‘Golden Gals Gone Wild’ Opening At The World of Wonder Gallery

3:50AM Defamer Hollywood | Knowing that no matter how many times we watched Bea Arthur scold those kids on Friday, our renewed lust for all things Golden Girls-related could not possibly be sated by just a single video clip, we dispatched Defamer Partywatcher Ann and photographer Amy Rodrigue to the World of Wonder gallery in Hollywood to the Saturday night opening of “Golden Gals Gone Wild,” the “first art exhibition devoted to erotic depictions” of Blanche, Dorothy, Rose, and perhaps most distressingly, Sophia. (Don’t fret if you didn’t make the launch – the show is running for four weeks, giving you plenty of time to ogle their gilded goodies.) A brief report follows after the jump: More »