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'High School Musical 3' The Soundtrack Of Change
Posted by Seth at 2:04 AM on November 4, 2008
Never in our wildest dreams did we think our Halloween gift to you—the Do-It-Yourself Grazerhead mask—would become the runaway success that it did, with literally tens of thousands of the Officially Sanctioned Headshots™ swarming the streets of L.A. Friday night, each accompanied by their very own candy-appraisal attaché. (Grazerhead: "What do we think about Nerds?" Attaché: "We like them.") We urge you to send in your Night of the Living Grazerheads Photos; in the meantime, unwrap some US box office numbers from your premium candy pile:
Low energy? Have a nutritious boost with this recipe for a Defamer Monday Morning Power-Up Smoothie:
Time to unzip your Happy Weekend Suit and step back into your Monday Morning Iron Maiden: The work week is again upon us. Quick—jumpstart your productivity with some US box office numbers before someone finds your position detrimental to the bottom line:
It's a special day for moviegoers — the first time in three weeks those studio jokers didn't leave the equivalent of a flaming bag of crap on our doorstep Friday morning. Thanks, Hollywood! Their reward? One of the best non-Labor Day September weekends in years, as illustrated by our regular browse through the Monday Morning Box Office:
Forgive us. We're still a little hazy, having stumbled out in the wee morning hours from a Chateau Marmont bungalow, where the Jonas Brothers were reading bible passages off a stripper's arse at their official post-VMAs party. Good news: our virginity is still intact! Bad news: we wish we could say the same about our septum. More bad news: the box office crapped itself this weekend. Please enjoy this fittingly humdrum installment of Monday Morning Box Office:
Having been nudged awake this morning by a shirtless man in a fedora and pink Chuck Taylors as you snoozed peacefully beneath a table outside Intelligentsia Cafe, another Sunset Junction appears to have come and gone—as has any memory of the last seven hours you spent there. We'll give you a moment to gather your belongings before inundating you with the weekend's box office receipts:
Having paid tribute this weekend to Michael Phelps's historic athletic achievement with a record-shattering of your own in the 200-liter grain-alcohol-medley, your soaring national pride has likely given way to the agony of hangover defeat. Have some box office number; they're full of electrolytes:
Does Death's 
Welcome to August, where besides you and that weird dude in the mailroom who collects signed photos of the Howard Stern Wack Pack, the office is eerily devoid of life. Comfort yourselves with some box office numbers:
How To Tell If You've Been Partying Too Hard: A Defamer Quiz 
