. What would Mel Gibson's church do with that much in tax-free assets? The guesses are on this morning after the actor-director's Agoura Hills redoubt at the Church of the Holy Family recently revealed another $US10 million tossed into its coffers, with few expenses beyond building add-ons and $US69,000 in legal services. Gibson is reportedly the only contributor to the church, which has about 70 members and has performed no charitable giving of note. The Vatican doesn't recognise the man or the institution (and he doesn't recognise it), so how is an Oscar-winning anti-Semite to spend all that cash? God knows he's not putting much into his father's Web site, unless you count the $US20 in sound effects thrown over that foreboding picture of Jesus. [Fox News]

Robert De Niro has been picking up work where he can — a speaking engagement here, a morning-show gig there — so we were more than little surprised last week when we heard he'd backed out of the thriller Edge of Darkness, currently shooting in Boston. That's not the De Niro who jumped to ostensibly greener pastures at Endeavor a while back, and it's definitely not the consummate professional whom producers brought aboard to make alpha-male magic with Mel Gibson and director Martin Campbell. But a report today out of Massachusetts offers no fewer than four scenarios making the rounds — chief among them being a sort of fantastically Kubrickesque golf-course torture:

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Bringing to mind that little-known time when a snoring Anna Nicole Smith was briskly escorted from the Cannes premiere of Wong Kar-wai's 2046, chatter coming out of the desert has folks wondering what Britney Spears might be up to at the ongoing CineVegas Film Festival. This isn't quite like Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan hitting Park City to ostensibly promote their own films, after all; with four years remaining before Crossroads: The 10th Anniversary Cut makes the A-list fest rounds, Britney's attendance may have been purely incidental to the cinephile bedlam around it. Nevertheless, at least one observer (a fest juror, no less!) wasn't letting the celebritunity pass her by:

[T]he presence of Britney Spears in a poolside cabana at the CineVegas party was enough to turn all of us serious cinema people into gawking gossips. I counted four people in her cabana — and every time I looked in, no one was speaking, and at one point, Ms. Spears herself appeared to be texting — but this micro-entourage required a full wall of security detail, and attracted a nearly-unnavigable crowd of onlookers.

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There's nothing better than returning from a long weekend to discover not one but two incredibly positive stories about Britney Spears. Not only has the singer finally managed to make a public appearance looking downright hot, but she's also begun dating a very eligible, scandal-free bachelor — William Morris agent Jason Trawick. As you may recall, Trawick was the mystery man splashing around Mel Gibson's Costa Rica retreat with Britney last week, and reportedly has been looking after Britney ever since the beginning of her American Tragedy downfall. As a source tells OK!, "Britney totally trusts him and she has very deep feelings for him. It's now got to the point where Britney wants to be with him full time." And after seeing these pictures of the pair, who went public at an Ed Hardy party over the weekend, we can't help but notice a very sober-looking Britney appearing genuinely happy for the first time in...ever:

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Jennifer Aniston did it first, quickly followed by Blake Lively. Now Britney Spears has pulled out this spring's most reliable accessory to nab a boy toy: the bikini. While sobering up at Casa Gibson down in Costa Rica, Spears spent the weekend looking happier than she has in months in two very itty bitty string bikinis adorned with tattoo parlor jargon. And in between bouts of boogie-boarding, golf cart-riding and rounds of Hide-and-Seek played amidst driftwood, Spears appeared to have successfully lined up a male suitor of her own. Who the mystery man might be, and a closer look at Spears' ongoing tendency to block her possibly-knocked up belly from sight, after the jump.

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Back in March, we heard Malibu's own Ken and Barbie, Mel Gibson and Britney Spears, were aligning their forces of stupidity for the greater good. But it was tough to figure out whether or not they were on a date or set to co-produce a new film starring each and every one of their split personalities. But thanks to recent reports, it sounds as though the partnership was neither love- or business-bound. They're just two confused drunks trying to stay clean together! Master of sobriety Mel recently flew both Britney and her owner, father Jamie Spears, down for a vacation at his Costa Rican clam shack for some R&R. But why now? And more importantly, why does Britney keep hiding her newly rotund tummy from the paparazzi?

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Today, People has revealed that Kate Hudson will appear as the cover girl for their 2008 Most Beautiful People issue, and we'd certainly like to send out a hearty congrats to the recently divorced single mum who's currently nursing Owen Wilson back to health. But after taking a look back at the list of stars who've previously nabbed the annual issue's cover spot, we fear there may be a curse accompanying the glossy honour. Sure, Leonardo DiCaprio (1998) and Julia Roberts (2000, 2005) haven't slipped up since having their smiley visage top the list, but a sizeable chunk of the winning alumni eerily saw their public and private lives undergo a downward spiral following their appearance on the issue's cover. We took a closer look at the possible curse-laden honour after the jump:

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· Mel Gibson has signed on for his first acting job since Signs and We Were Soldiers back in 2002. In Edge of Darkness, a feature based on a BBC miniseries from the '80s, he'll play "a straitlaced police investigator whose activist daughter is killed, probably by the Jews." [Variety]
· Could one-half of the lusty network coupling responsible for siring struggling, bastard offspring The CW be missing their former identity? Warner Bros. just launched TheWB.com, where you can catch streamed episodes of old programming and newly launched online series. [Variety]

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Come for the illustration featuring Jesus locked in fisticuffs with a Jewish studio mogul, but stay a while at Heeb Magazine for Eric Kohn's nifty survey of how Mel Gibson ruined it for the rest of the Christians trying to get a leg up in Hollywood. Well, kind of: It turns out all the conspiracy theories in the world can't explain why, after The Passion grossed $600 million worldwide in 2004, our friends in Christ haven't been able to break through with another global hit for the faithful. Is it the Jews? Is it the MPAA? Or is it just, as one infamous anecdote alludes, that some of these guys make pouty Edward Norton look positively docile in comparison?

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