kevin costner
Flotsam & Jetsam
Finally, The World Is Spared Another Show About Lawyers
12:44AM Richard Lawson | Hipster movies are made, as are ones about the depraved world of small town Texas. Which are sorta hipster in their own right. Bad news for David E. Kelley, which is good news for us. More »
August Blahs Hit Hard as Scummy ‘Mummy’ Threatens Bat-Superiority
2:05AM STV | Welcome back to Defamer Attractions, your regular guide to new hits, misses and dead ends this weekend at the movies — and considering our sudden passage into the August filmgoing doldrums, we could use all the guidance we can get. Still, Batman’s dark shadow stretches into its second week while another, stinkier franchise will do all it can to vanquish The Dark Knight at the box office. Meanwhile, we fear for Kevin Costner, have a film-festival darling in mind for this week’s Underdog pick, and have a bleary-eyed glance at the latest DVD releases as well. As usual, our opinions are our own, but they’re also essentially failsafe, so read them and weep! Literally!
Touring the Exotic Public Restrooms of China, With Your Host Conan O’Brien
7:38AM STV | Viewers who tuned in Wednesday to Late Night With Conan O’Brien were treated to very special vacation slideshow by Mummy 3 star Maria Bello, who, during a recent visit to China, skipped the Great Wall and the Forbidden City in exchange for the more fantastic tour of Misconceived Bathroom Placards. It’s not just the mangled English (”handicapped” = “deformed”) and malaprops that make the show-and-tell special, however. Just take a moment to enjoy O’Brien’s play-by-play, abetted by headlining guest Kevin Costner’s awkward sidekick chuckle, after the jump. If it’s not enough to make you forget Andy Richter, it’s at least enough to make you forget this man once won an Academy Award. In any case, we genuinely wouldn’t mind if they revived this segment every week. [NBC] More »
Kevin Costner Reduced to Stealing Mediocrity From the Dead
10:35AM STV | A disturbing revelation has come to light today about Swing Vote, Kevin Costner’s election-year opus about the alcoholic schlub on whose shoulders the entirety of presidential politics rests via some fluke of electoral nature. It’s about as disappointing as its midsummer dumping implies, writes NY Post critic Lou Lumenick, but that hardly seems as unexpected as his observation that the whole film rips off is an “uncredited remake” of a 1939 John Barrymore film called The Great Man Votes: More »
Trade Roundup: Fox Planning ‘Prison Break: Chicks In Lock-Up Edition’
6:45AM Defamer Hollywood | · Why does it take the threat of a strike for people to start cranking out the truly genius ideas? Fox has ordered a script that could generate a Prison Break spin-off set in a women’s penitentiary, a project that would be perfect for Michelle Rodriguez once she concludes some previous obligations. [THR] · Jessica Biel will star in the United Artists of Tom Cruise-produced thriller Die a Little, a project during which the actress will be evaluated for her potential fitness as Katie Holmes’ inevitable replacement. Hey, Holmes can’t stay young enough to pretend to have his robot babies forever. [Variety] More »
Success Stories
5:30AM Defamer Hollywood | After seven months of suffering through the unrequited love of their favourite actor, the proprietors of If I Blog It, They Will Come finally entice Kevin Costner to visit their online shrine to the Field of Dreams star. Tears are shed and new friendships are forged in what will doubtlessly prove the feel-good link of the day. [If I Blog It They Will Come] More »Short Ends: More Bad Movie Accent Fun
6:58AM Defamer Hollywood | This list of 13 isn’t the first time we’ve seen someone try to determine the worst fake accents in movie history, but we think it’s a debate always worth revisiting, even if Keanu Reeves in Dracula can never be beaten. (Not even by Costner in Robin Hood – and as you can see in the clip above, that guy was horrible!) [via BoingBoing] Bridget Moynihan’s publicist isn’t telling the world the name of the actress’s just-delivered baby. We suspect it’s because she’s trying convince Moynihan that while calling the boy Fuck Tom Brady might feel good right now, she’ll probably regret it the moment she signs the birth certificate. It shouldn’t take much more than one photo of a rehabbing Lindsay Lohan reading the AA manual to convince us she’s really serious about sobriety this time, right? Do you mean to tell us that Donald Trump might just be blowing some smoke up America’s ass when he talks about all the celebrities dying to get on the new Apprentice? More »
Trade Roundup: Kevin Costner To Act Out Hollywood’s Political Wet Dream
6:26AM Defamer Hollywood | · Aging, erstwhile megastar Kevin Costner will produce and star in the “indie election comedy” Swing Vote, in which he’ll play a guy who, through the kind of incredible plot contrivance from which hilarity will inevitably ensue, discovers he will cast the deciding vote in the presidential race. Also: Does anyone have any idea what Mr. Brooks is about? We keep zoning out during the commercials before we can figure it out. [Variety] · Rapper Common’s acting career is, as we’re told the kids like to say, “blowing up.” He’ll join Morgan Freeman and Angelina Jolie in Universal’s Wanted, and is in talks to outact Keanu Reeves in The Night Watchman. [THR] · Superstar legal pundit Nancy Grace jettisons her Court TV show so that she can focus all of her crazy energy on being shrill on her higher-profile CNN showcase. [Variety] · Roughly 19 million viewers tune in to US Dancing with the Stars to simultaneously wonder if Billy Ray Cyrus’s moves might be improved if he had a prosthetic leg. [[THR] · Veronica Mars showrunner Rob “Not the Matchbox 20 Guy, We Think” Thomas poo-poos chatter that his show’s already been given up for dead by The CW. [Variety] More »
