kerry katona

Brian McFadden To Battle ‘Troubled’ Kerry Katona For Custody Of Their Two Children

1:19PM Jess McGuire | After his ex-wife, former Atomic Kitten ’singer’ Kerry Katona, made a disastrous appearance last week on a British television program where she slurred throughout her conversation with the show’s hosts, Brian McFadden is apparently set to fight his former missus for custody of their little ones. Delta Goodrem’s finance, Brian McFadden, will reportedly fight his ex-wife for the custody of their two children. McFadden, who is living with Goodrem in Sydney’s Woolloomooloo, will fly back to the UK to fight Kerry Katona in the courts in an attempt to bring his daughters Molly, seven, and six-year-old Lilly-Sue, to live with him in Australia, The Sun reports. The Daily Telegraph article goes on to describe Kerry Katona as someone who is “used to sell chicken nuggets in commercials”, although that may be a harsh assessment – she the face of Iceland, a supermarket chain, which sounds somewhat better. More »

Today In Kerry Katona Breast Reduction News

1:00PM Clem Bastow | We’re a caring bunch here at Defamer Australia, so when I was perusing the British trash rags newspapers this morning, I knew you’d be dying to hear all about this particular bit of celebrity news: Kerry Katona is having her bazoongas reduced! Not only that, but she’s going to film the operation for her celebreality show. Yes, I know, I know – it should have been the first news item of the day but, you know, sometimes these major stories just trickle down slowly. Hell, it took me five months to find out that Kevin Rudd won the election! She says: ‘After four kids I need it. I’m a GG at the moment, and when I take my bra off my nipples are by my feet. I want to be a DD instead.’ More »

No Seriously, Brian McFadden, Tell Us What You Really Think Of Kerry Katona

1:00PM Clem Bastow | Say what you will about Brian “Potato” McFadden and his music/taste in women/choice of hairstyle, but through the whole split with ex-wife Kerry “Chipshop” Katona/shack up with Delta “Postmodern Mermaid Fantasy” Goodrem thing, he has at least acquitted himself in a largely mature and sensible manner, refusing to stoop to the levels of press-baiting that Chipshop seems particularly fond of. Until now, that is. Brian, who lives with partner Delta Goodrem in Australia, told the News of the World: “Kerry is a disgusting human being. “She manipulates people and plays the sympathy card for every stupid mistake she makes. Me and my family have been put through hell by her stupid games. “She uses my two girls as a weapon in her childish games. She is an embarrassment to me, my family and my children.” Awesome! Eight thumbs up! Good to see Katona and McFadden are working hard to stay friends if only for the kids, too. Potato goes on to report that the couple’s daughters, Molly and Lilly-Sue, often report back to him about Katona’s trips to the Priory, etc. Now all we need to know is what they then return to Katona and say, perhaps something about how boring Daddy’s new girlfriend is, and how she always sings sitting down, as though she’s sharted? We’ll just have to wait for that exclusive! More »

Kerry Katona’s Little Bundle Of Joy

12:30PM Clem Bastow | We know it’s neither big nor clever to laugh at babies, but when we saw this little blurb and pic linking to the news of Kerry Katona’s new bub, we had to stifle more than a few laffs: “Already bearing some resemblance to his mother”? Is it just us, or is The Daily Mail being a bit cheeky? It is, shall we say, not the loveliest bit of footage of a newborn we’ve ever seen – and, oh, wouldn’t you know it, it was all caught on camera for Kerry’s fly-on-the-wall MTV series. Happy days! More »

The Kerry Katona Guide To Pregnancy And Parenthood

8:44AM Clem Bastow | Former Celebrity Mum of The Year Kerry Katona™ continues to kick parenting goals that we’re guessing her PR peeps would probably prefer we didn’t hear about, except – oops! – Kerry invited MTV cameras into her life and home for her fly-on-the-wall series, Crazy In Love. So, based on continued updates courtesy of the Daily Mail and Crazy In Love, we thought we’d tally up some tips and hints on parenting and pregnancy based on what Kerry – again, Former Celebrity Mum of The Year – has to tell us. Read on! More »

Chipshop Tires Of Smoking, Drinking While Pregnant, Goes To Rehab

10:40AM Clem Bastow | Well! We were going to tell you about Kerry Katona laughably needing to get hypnotherapy to quit smoking (she’s pregnant, but evidently the thought that her bub might come out deformed or ill wasn’t enough of an incentive to give up the cancer sticks), but she’s gone and one-upped herself. Kerry Katona has entered The Priory! The Priory, for those who don’t know, is essentially the UK’s Betty Ford or Promises, and finds a lot of its more famous patients in attendance for “emotional exhaustion”. However, in Chipshop’s case, that seems to be spot on: The pregnant mother-of-three fell to pieces after learning about her husband’s alleged affair with a barmaid and more reports of her doing drugs. Currently being treated in the Priory, Kerry is said to be “severely emotional and depressed” which has forced MTV to temporarily halt filming at the stars home. Poor Kerry. As much as she’s fun to point and laugh at, and as much as she can be a complete and utter nong (smoking/drinking/drugging while pregnant, marrying Brian McFadden, leaving Atomic Kitten), we get the feeling that underneath it all she’s just an uncomplicated lass from the wrong end of town who somehow got “lucky”. We trust she’ll be back and entertaining us all soon! More »

Kerry Katona’s Reality Series Obviously In Frontrunner To Take Out Newly-Minted Pulitzer Prize For Television

1:29PM Clem Bastow | We’ve complained in the past about how much we envy the Brits their trashtastic celebreality programming, but we think they may have come up with the ultimate blow to any other country’s aspirations in the same genre, by allowing Former Celebrity Mum of The Year Kerry “My Drug Hell”/”My Pregnancy Scare”/”My Back Room Needs Renovating So Make The Cheque Out To Cash Thanks” Katona in front of a camera with her new series, Crazy In Love, which is designed to show the public how loving her marriage with Mark Croft is – but like so many who have gone before her (Jessica, Britney, Anna Nicole, Flavor Flav), it hasn’t turned out exactly as sympathetically as she might have hoped. The picture we’ve chosen to illustrate this piece is from the show, a scene where Kerry strips down – pregnant – to do a “sexy” photo shoot. And there are many more unbelievable screen caps here, just begging to be LOLKERRY’d. The couple allowed TV crews into their lives to film MTV documentary Kerry Katona: Crazy in Love to prove that despite rumours of a troubled relationship, their marriage is stronger than ever. But their plan may have backfired, with the pair spending much of last night’s debut program telling one another to “shut your face” and “shut your trap.” Making a splash: the pair regularly told one another to ’shut your face’ during last night’s show Leaving charm at the door, Mark was also filmed saying: “She’s like a bad fart, she lingers but she does go away. “I’m romantic, I often just say to her spontaneously lets go out and get a meal. Kerry’s never took me out for a meal, she doesn’t appreciate the things I do for her. “I show my affection and love for you and you just show me hatred.” It goes without saying, naturally, that if any UK-based Defamer Australia pals feel like whacking a tape in for this one and sending it over post haste, we will be forever thankful. Judging by the comments on that story, we think the British public liked it, too: “Poor, poor unborn baby. With a selfish, vain, odious creature like Kerry Katona for a mother and a scruffy, common, ugly wimp for a father the poor bairn doesn’t stand a chance. Why on earth would a couple like that even contemplate bringing a child into their world. They need to grow up themselves first.” Winner! More »