It's no secret that I'm a fan of a hilariously hyperbolic headline, particularly from the British tabloid rag subgenre (see: Freddie Starr Ate My Hamster). So, it's nice to see that the news.com.au crew have been inspired - clearly - by their friends across the pond with this Monday morning corker:

Nazi fears stopped me snorting cocaine: Helen Mirren

Read More »

Congratulations to Oscar winning sixty-something year old actress Dame Helen Mirren whose never ending hotness - remember? - has led to her enviably flat stomach being declared the third sexiest tummy on the planet, as judged by the makers of a "stomach flattening supplement" called AntiBloat (and can you imagine better folk to assess celeb torsos? I cannot...)

The 63-year-old actress - who recently wowed onlookers with her trim physique when she donned a bikini while on holiday in the Italian Riviera - came third in the poll.

Read More »

Continuing our celebration of all things Helen Mirren today, please enjoy this delightful skit from French & Saunders.

Proving once and for all that she cannot actually be a real human being, but instead some sort of sexy fembot whose body never ages or rusts, Helen Mirren has been snapped in a bikini during a holiday in Italy.

OH. MY. GOD.

Granted, Helen Mirren hasn't weathered the body storm that is child-bearing, but still - the woman is about to turn sixty three, people. SIXTY THREE!

There are more depressingly stunning shots of the Oscar winning dame over at the Daily Mail. I can't decide if they give me hope for the future, or just make me want to cry. Damn your older lady hotness, Helen. Damn it to bits.

We've already heard enough stars insisting that those sex scenes we find either major turn-ons (Mickey Rourke force-feeding Kim Basinger strawberries on the kitchen floor in 9 1/2 Weeks) or majorly eye-scarring (Heather Graham faking her way through grainy limo thrusts in Boogie Nights) are totally perfunctory while filming. With the massive crew surrounding them, the sudden lighting checks, and simple fact that they've gotta feign spontaneous heat take after take, we've leaned towards taking their word for it. And as it turns out, no matter how big the star or legendary their prowess in the bedroom, even simple kissing scenes with the most gorgeous A-listers around range from "awkward and sweaty" to "slightly icky and sort of wet." Where Tom Cruise, Angelina Jolie, Harrison Ford, Leonardo DiCaprio and more rank on the list of Worst On-Screen Kissers after the jump.

Read More »

· Brad Pitt's shingle, Plan B in name only (we're looking at you, Aniston), buys rights to David Grann manuscript, "Lost City of Z," for Pitt to produce and star in. [Variety]
· Helen Mirren and Christopher Plummer replace Meryl Streep and Anthony Hopkins in Tolstoy biopic The Last Station, putting the production down two Oscars but up two Golden Globes (wink!). [Variety]

Read More »

Perhaps to inject the otherwise snoozy Oscars tonight (no parties! Stewart again! predictable winners!) with some pizazz, the actresses on the carpet went with red dresses in all shades: Katherine Heigl, sans Josh as far as we could tell, wore a fire engine red one-strap number; Miley Cyrus proved she's still a girl, but not yet a woman, in a tight bright red dress to show off her underage, yet budding, figure; Helen Mirren proved once again that being a slightly more "mature" actress in no way means you can't look sexy. Take a look at all the ladies who took red and made it work:

Read More »

· Entourage's Kevin Dillon joins Emma Roberts, Don Cheadle and Lisa Kudrow in hotly anticipated canine-housing drama Hotel for Dogs. [THR]

· The Golden Globes will present Steven Spielberg with its Cecil B. DeMille award, a statuette he'll toss on the steadily growing pile of honourary hardware he keeps in his basement - at this point in his life, only the Oscars make the mantle. [Variety]

Read More »

· The guy who took this video of Harrison Ford and George Lucas on the last day of production on Indy 4 is probably going to wind up hanging on a hook next to that loose-lipped extra in the Universal lot commissary's meat locker.
· He's got the funny electric cars, the high-profile political and social causes, and the obligatory self-destructive streak, but the opening weekend failure of Michael Clayton has Slate wondering if he's bad at the part of being a movie star the studios actually give a shit about.

Read More »