facefuck
People
9:46AM Jess McGuire | At the beginning of the week, I was shocked and appalled by an article I’d read in The Guardian titled ‘He two-timed me on Facebook. But our divorce will be for real’. I couldn’t work out if it was simply a horribly written piece about horrible people or if it was satire, and asked “Is this an amazing example of over-sharing via newspaper? Is Georgina a comic genius? Should I cry a little for the state of mankind?”
Thankfully someone over in the UK has gotten in contact with me and filled in the blanks a little. Now, providing what they have told me is true, I can cease weeping for my fellow humans… at least until Metro Station have another hit.
Here’s what they told me about the writer and her ex: More »
From The ‘Were We Lied To?’ Files | Facebook May Not Be Responsible For That Divorce After All
9:46AM Jess McGuire | At the beginning of the week, I was shocked and appalled by an article I’d read in The Guardian titled ‘He two-timed me on Facebook. But our divorce will be for real’. I couldn’t work out if it was simply a horribly written piece about horrible people or if it was satire, and asked “Is this an amazing example of over-sharing via newspaper? Is Georgina a comic genius? Should I cry a little for the state of mankind?”
Thankfully someone over in the UK has gotten in contact with me and filled in the blanks a little. Now, providing what they have told me is true, I can cease weeping for my fellow humans… at least until Metro Station have another hit.
Here’s what they told me about the writer and her ex: More » 
Flotsam & Jetsam
12:28PM Jess McGuire | These days I find it quite hard to work out whether certain things I read on the internet are pisstakes or not. For instance, it took me longer than I care to share to conclude that Shane Skillz is most definitely taking the mickey, and I am still completely unsure as to whether Georgina Hobbs-Meyer, writing a piece in The Guardian about her husband’s cyber cheating on Facebook, has a wicked sense of humour, or whether she is simply incredibly tedious. I mean, really – WTF? My bullshit-dar used to be incredibly powerful. But the internet has made things confusing for me.
In the case of Georgina Hobbs-Meyer, please help me decide. IS THIS SATIRE?
My mother emailed me last week to tell me she had joined Facebook. We don’t chat on the phone; we email. Soon I expect she will want to poke me, write on my wall and, worse still, tag me in photographs of my wedding last May. Well, not if I can help it, mama. I love you too much to expose you to my online self.
You see, she doesn’t yet know that I, her 24-year-old daughter, am about to divorce. She can’t see my Facebook status, so why would she?
But of course. Of course you’d update your Facebook status to reflect your current marital woes before you’d confide in your parents. Do go on, Georgina.
More »
From The ‘Is This Satire?’ Files | Facebook Leads To Divorce, Excruciatingly Rubbish Articles In The Guardian
12:28PM Jess McGuire | These days I find it quite hard to work out whether certain things I read on the internet are pisstakes or not. For instance, it took me longer than I care to share to conclude that Shane Skillz is most definitely taking the mickey, and I am still completely unsure as to whether Georgina Hobbs-Meyer, writing a piece in The Guardian about her husband’s cyber cheating on Facebook, has a wicked sense of humour, or whether she is simply incredibly tedious. I mean, really – WTF? My bullshit-dar used to be incredibly powerful. But the internet has made things confusing for me.
In the case of Georgina Hobbs-Meyer, please help me decide. IS THIS SATIRE?
My mother emailed me last week to tell me she had joined Facebook. We don’t chat on the phone; we email. Soon I expect she will want to poke me, write on my wall and, worse still, tag me in photographs of my wedding last May. Well, not if I can help it, mama. I love you too much to expose you to my online self.
You see, she doesn’t yet know that I, her 24-year-old daughter, am about to divorce. She can’t see my Facebook status, so why would she?
But of course. Of course you’d update your Facebook status to reflect your current marital woes before you’d confide in your parents. Do go on, Georgina.
More »
People
2:53PM Jess McGuire | Did you know that Katie Price aka Jordan aka Mrs Peter Andre is on Facebook? Yes, she is! Obviously she doesn’t want to get pestered by fans, so she’s come up with an astounding name to throw people off the scent.
Yup, that ought to do the trick.
(Via HolyMoly.co.uk) More »
Katie Price Goes Incognito On Facebook
2:53PM Jess McGuire | Did you know that Katie Price aka Jordan aka Mrs Peter Andre is on Facebook? Yes, she is! Obviously she doesn’t want to get pestered by fans, so she’s come up with an astounding name to throw people off the scent.
Yup, that ought to do the trick.
(Via HolyMoly.co.uk) More »
People
1:40PM Jess McGuire | Oh man, I absolutely LOL’d when this turned up in my Facebook stalker feed just then!
HAHAHAHAHA YOU PUNNED THAT SO HARD, THE BASS!
I’m not sure most of her Facebook friends truly got the genius of it though. Except for Michael, who returned her wit with a sweet “volley”.
She’s yet to make contact with me, but I’m sure it’ll be any day now…
More »
BassBook Watch: Natalie Bassingthwaighte’s Puntastic Status Update!
1:40PM Jess McGuire | Oh man, I absolutely LOL’d when this turned up in my Facebook stalker feed just then!
HAHAHAHAHA YOU PUNNED THAT SO HARD, THE BASS!
I’m not sure most of her Facebook friends truly got the genius of it though. Except for Michael, who returned her wit with a sweet “volley”.
She’s yet to make contact with me, but I’m sure it’ll be any day now…
More » Attention ‘The News’: Please Sign Out Of Facebook
1:44PM Jess McGuire | It might be a stretch to start referring to Sydney Confidential as ‘The News’ but what they produce is news in my world, and no matter how messed up that may be, it’s just the way it is.
I’m here to beg of you, Sydney Confidential – please, please log yourselves out of Facebook and focus on the task of actually digging up real dirt on Z-list celebrities the old fashioned “offline” way.
Frankly, this little item from New Year’s Day bothered me. A lot.
TV personality Charlotte Dawson started 2009 with a personal achievement, of sorts – ringing in the new year without going overboard on the booze.
More » Roberta Williams Shuts Down Her Daughter’s Facebook Page Due To Family Saying “Nasty Things”
12:20PM Jess McGuire | Facebook has once again revealed itself to be the online home of “inherently unpleasant” people, with word that Roberta Williams has been forced to shut down her daughter Dakhota’s account.. because a relative has started saying awful things about the little girl online!
Underbelly maven Roberta Williams has deleted her daughter’s Facebook profile because of a stoush with her sister. Despite the option of sending private messages on the social networking site, the matriarch erased daughter Dakhota’s page and explained why to her 4792 friends.
Which member of the family has been slagging off Dhakota on Facebook? And why isn’t the AdelaideNow site spelling Dhakota’s name correctly (or spelling Dakota incorrectly correctly, as the case may be)? More » 
How’s ‘The Bass’ Going On Facebook?
1:05PM Jess McGuire | Y’all remember The Bass is all over social networking sites now, yeah? It seems like literally days since I’ve had a sook about my Facebook wall being a fawning Bassingthwaighte comment-free zone, but don’t think my pain over that issue has lessened in any way. If anything, the Christmas season just hammered home how alone I feel sometimes, and how much I need some personalised love from The Bass.
While Natalie Bassingthwaighte is yet to deliver the personal comment goods as far as yours truly is concerned, I cannot fault her enthusiasm for the site as a whole. Every day I wake up to find my feed littered with news of Natalie making new friends, being tagged in a picture with fans, and adding new photos to albums called “NYE Rehearsals 30/12/08.”
She’s ALSO written a couple of notes. The following was my favourite:
More » 
I Have Had My Feelings Hurt By Natalie Bassingthwaighte
1:45PM Jess McGuire | Earlier this week, I alerted you to the news that pop star Natalie Bassingthwaighte had added me as a friend on Facebook. This was a good thing, people! I was tremendously honoured and excited. I felt sure that she’d comment on my wall sooner rather than later, appreciating my support over the years, but friends? Things haven’t gone to plan.
Now I know that by going public with my tale of woe, I am probably jeopardising any chance I may have had in the future of interviewing Natalie Bassingthwaighte, but I had a long hard think about it and I cannot help but feel that it’s better to get the truth out there, you know? I suppose the best way I can explain the situation to you is to copy and paste the Description section of the Facebook group I have created called ‘I have had my feelings hurt by Natalie Bassingthwaighte’. I haven’t invited anyone to join the group as this is a personal issue for me and I don’t want to assume that anyone else in my friendship circle has had their feelings hurt by Natalie Bassingthwaighte, but if you’ve felt some personal pain caused either directly or indirectly by The Bass, you are welcome to join.
Before we get into it though, I do want to add that I have heard nothing but good things about The Bass “in real life” from mutual acquaintances who rate her highly. This is why the Facebook snubbing hurts so much. C’MON NAT, REACH OUT TO ME.
Ahem. Let’s continue, eh? More » Further To Our Earlier ‘Piece’ About The Facebooking 3AW Employee…
3:17PM Jess McGuire | … the 3AW Rumour File (how appropriate!) tells us that for all our joking, we were nearly spot on when it came to our merry jibes about the newsreader being too preoccupied with stalking an ex on Facebook to deliver the 4pm bulletin!
Ah, break ups. They may not result in workplace goal kicking – but at least they keep you busy, what with all the wall-to-walling, decoding status updates, and asking yourself who the hell that new girl is who just posted a totally flirtacious comment on his page DOESN’T HE LOVE YOU ANYMORE, DIDN’T YOU MEAN ANYTHING TO HIM?! WHAT DOES HE MEAN “IT’S COMPLICATED”?!
MORE:
3AW Employee Too Busy Poking And Stalking Exes On Facebook To Present News Bulletin
3AW newsreader misses bulletin to surf Facebook More » 3AW Employee Too Busy Poking And Stalking Exes On Facebook To Present News Bulletin
11:08AM Jess McGuire | Do you ever read a story where you know you’re meant to be thinking “What an idiot!” but secretly you’re thinking “God, that’s absolutely something I would do!”? That happened to me this morning when I heard about the 3AW newsreader who is in a bit of trouble after being so engrossed in Facebook, they forgot to present the hourly news bulletin. Arf!
THE team at 3AW have been instructed to watch their computer usage after the radio station missed a news bulletin because the newsreader was on Facebook.
Genius. More » 
