The Case of the Sticky-Fingered Domestics. The British tabloid press is reporting that Gareth Emmett, 25, has been arrested for suspected burglary following the arrest of parents Eric and June Emmett—who happen to be David and Victoria Beckham's housekeepers. "[Posh's] dad Tony first became suspicious after being alerted to the personal nature of some memorabilia that was being flogged on eBay. He and wife Jackie checked them out - and were horrified to discover they were identical to items that should have been at their daughter's mansion." Dammit! Just when we thought that orange bathrobe was practically in our hot little hands. [Daily Mail]

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In the scheme of "unpleasant mental images", it's probably safe to say that the idea of "King" Kyle Sandilands at the urinal probably ranks with, as the old Austin Powers line goes, Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day (or, while we're on the topic, Alexander Downer wearing that old stockings and high heels get-up - BUT WITH NOTHING ELSE). So how kind of Sandilands to forcibly enter the nation's imagination with a little anecdote he couldn't help but tell about the time he perved on David Beckham's knob accidentally shared a bathroom with David Beckham.

Sandilands told listeners to his radio show that he had been "in the toilet at Villa nightclub in LA and there's only two urinals in there, it's very small".

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What fun it must be to have a baby, get married, or turn one year older if you're lucky enough to be chummy with Village People Fan Club president Tom Cruise. As a card-carrying member of Tom's inner circle of disco-dancing Xenu-fearing tribe of pals, new mum Nicole Kidman had the joy of receiving one of Cruise's trademark lavish gifts — as People reports, the birth of little Sunday Urban prompted Nicole's ex-partner in bearded crime to send over a huge "high-end" gift basket filled to the brim with fancy baby must-haves. But after reviewing Tom's history of gifting his nearest and dearest with incredibly bizarre and, at times, inappropriate items, we suspect his inclusion of "Giraffe baby blankets" might actually be a subtle swipe at Kidman's tendency to resemble the long-necked drowsy animal. Cruise's unnerving presents of the past to fellow Tom-ophiles like Dakota Fanning and Katie Holmes, after the jump.

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This may come as a shock, but we have some troubling news to report: it seems that the Double Dating, Non-Eating foursome of Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and power duo Posh 'n Becks differ in one key regard. As opposed to TomKat's demure sartorial choices, from their first public motorcycle ride to their wedding attire to Katie's current desire to wear dresses with hemlines as long as possible, their British counterparts just love showing us some skin. As People reports, frosty-locked David has been confirmed to appear in yet another glossy ad campaign for Armani, in which the soccer star will continue to contort his Adonis body into poses highlighting his too-good-to-be-true physical assets. Since the new pictures coincide with recently released oddball shots taken of permanently deadpan wife Victoria Beckham for Marc Jacobs' Spring/Summer print campaign, we took a nostalgic (and arousing) look back at just how many times the Beckhams have admirably sold their bodies for bundles of cash. Enjoy the various real and fake body parts belonging to Britain's most rare creation: a real live hot couple.

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We've been wondering for a while now when all these obsessed-over spawns of celebrities would finally grow up and start canoodling already. With all the "wombwatching" and "bump" updates screaming at us from the newsstands, all we really want to know is when Lourdes is going to start dating James Wilkie Parker Broderick (oy), or when Suri will link eyes with the matching-haircut, age-equivalent Maddox. But thank the pervy Hollywood heavens above, the wait is now over. As the NY Daily News reports today, two youngsters with very famous A-list parents are currently "dating," and "poised to take Hollywood by storm...and they have a combined age of 18!" Well! That's slightly disgusting but also beyond intriguing! The new hot couple on the schoolyard revealed, after the jump.

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Hello Magazine is reporting that Tom Cruise was plum out of ideas for what to get recently drifting BFF David Beckham for his birthday. So instead of a fruit basket or a lifetime supply of Tom Cruise Purple, the Hubbard-loving Clear decided to treat both Posh and Becks to a private weekend getaway at one of Cruise's favourite romantic spots in Napa Valley: his very own home!

"They wanted [Posh] and David to make use of their property [and] insisted that it should be just the two of them and that they should thoroughly spoil themselves."

But after hearing more details on just how Tom planned this so-called "private" getaway, we're worried the Beckhams are about to be abducted by a Xenuphobic SWAT team...

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We hate to rain on Tom Cruise's purity parade, but it seems his bundle of Hubbard Formula-chugging joy, Suri Cruise, has gone seriously gaga for two older men. And she's got the giggles to show it. While babysitting for all three Beckham boys as David bent it like...well, lost to the visiting team, Tom and Katie brought finger-nibbling Suri along to watch. But the blanketed Cruiselette only had eyes for one guy: and he goes by Brooklyn Beckham. Tom did seem more interested in setting up Suri with the littlest Beckham (Cruz Beckham! Just picturing future Scientology couple Suri Cruise and Cruz Beckham likely made Tom's removable head spin with possibilities), Suri couldn't keep her eyes off 9-year old Brooklyn. But earlier last week while still in NY, TomKat attended Suri's favourite musical, and we have a feeling fellow Scientologist John Travolta's role in the movie version had nothing to do with her ear-to-ear grin while leaving: a certain song-and-dancing Efronabbe got her all shook up...

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Though the Metropolitan Museum's annual Costume Gala is considered by most to be the Oscars of the fashion world, the truth of the matter is that no one really focuses on the clothes. What really matters is which celebrities show up to WEAR the clothes and, of course, whether or not they're lookin' good. That said, all eyes were entirely focused on the recently friction-laden, reportedly squabbling super-duo of Team Cruise and Team Beckham, who reunited once again for the cameras. And despite the gushing show of admiration and respect that the Beckhams demonstrated for the the Hubbard-lovers on yesterday's Oprah, both Holmes and Beckham were allegedly competing for the spotlight last night. And in the end? The girl with the higher-slit dress tends to win every time. More photos from the event, including our picks for the best and most horrific looks of the night, after the jump.

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The last two weeks have been rough on the friendship of one-time power duo Victoria Beckham and Katie Holmes. First, the meal-skipping, identical-haircut-sporting pair's friendship took a hit when Tom Cruise became concerned that Posh's influence was having a negative effect on Katie's health. Then, perhaps in retaliation, Victoria neglected to invite TomKat to her intimate pre-birthday dinner. Now, we hear that Katie has begun to distance herself from the Spice Girl-turned-professional partygoer, likely due to the assertions of the press that she's "morphed into Posh." So who's to blame? As Showbiz Spy reports, it seems that Katie Holmes is the culprit behind the fractured friendship:

"Holmes is annoyed Beckham is choosing to spend most of her time with new friends Eva Longoria and Kate Beckinsale."

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Last week, Victoria Beckham celebrated her 34th birthday alongside new friends Eva Longoria and Kate Beckinsale, but supposed close friends Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes were nowhere to be seen. Naturally, we presumed that this was either a result of Tom's edict for Katie to stop spending so much time with Posh or an early warning sign that Team Cruise's controlling ways were too much for the Beckhams to handle. But at last night's star-studded birthday party for Posh, not only were Tom and Katie in attendance, but her Katie's choice of gown left us wondering if her curious absence earlier in the week was simply a means to hide the fact that Suri Jr. could possibly be on the way.

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