Now what is former Queer Eye For The Straight Guy fashion guru Carson Kressley in the middle of doing in this photo, eh? Why, he's sharing some of his special couture secrets, that's what!

Yes, Carson - a man who appears willing to pop up anywhere for a fee, and god bless him for it (I always secretly wanted him to be a member of my fabulous posse of savvy homosexuals) - went into the Big Brother compound tonight for a couple of hours of EXTREME MAKEOVER-ING!

Who had he just "sorted out" when this snap of him was taken? Oh, only Corey the Party Boy, a teen who insists on wearing ridiculous head wear and sunnies most of the time, and who was in dire need of a little scrubbing up.

Check out a snap of Corey's post-Carson appearance after the jump!

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Ooooer! Apparently Bianca's getting her over-sized bra in a twist over the inclusion of Corey Worthington in this year's batch of housemates!

Bianca's initial reaction to Corey entering the House was a bad one. "I feel like screaming," she told Terri. Other HMs were shocked at Bianca's behaviour, especially Saxon, who pulled her aside to tell her she should get to know Corey first before she jumped to conclusions.

So Bianca decided to try and give Corey a go, realising that one of her mantras is, "You can't judge a book by its cover".

Unless that book is by Proust, in which case it should be assumed the book is very highbrow, and the large-chested smarmy woman holding it is probably a member of MENSA.

Bianca argued that she thought Corey had been disrespectful and she didn't approve of his behaviour. "I'll get to know the kid and give the kid a chance because I give everyone an equal chance. It's just what he represents that I don't like because I'm here to represent something that is completely the opposite."

Condescending arrogant know-it-alls who probably don't have enough friends to make it worth their while even throwing a party?

Later, the self-righteous philosopher-loving Bianca went to the diary room in order to vent about Corey.

"I have seen flashes of goodness but that makes me angrier," she said. Bianca explained that seeing slight elements of positive qualities in Corey frustrated her because it would mean Corey was not in line with what the media had portrayed.

BIANCA, DO YOU MEAN TO SAY YOU BELIEVE THAT A FIVE MINUTE SPOT ON A CURRENT AFFAIRS PROGRAM WHICH CLEARLY SET OUT FROM THE GET GO TO PAINT COREY AS AN IDIOTIC DRUNKARD YOUTH WITH NO RESPECT FOR AUTHORITY FIGURES AND WHO PERSONIFIED THE TARGET DEMOGRAPHICS' DEEPEST FEARS ABOUT TEENAGERS MAY NOT HAVE WHOLLY AND FAIRLY REPRESENTED COREY AS AN ACTUAL PERSON?

Surely she jests!

She told BB she was angry at him for bringing Corey into the House. "You've just set everything that I want to achieve back so far. You've just said the stereotype that everyone believes in [in regards to teenagers] is true."

"Bianca, Big Brother put you into the House as well," BB reminded her. "Why wouldn't kids go out and want to be like Bianca?"

Because she's a pretentious wanker?

"Because I'm in the minority," she retorted.

Oh. My bad.

Oh god.

Firstly, Midget Porn TM. Excellent. We've all seen the photos of Rima, yeah? We'd publish them here but we don't want to be sued, or something. Maybe it's cos we're highbrow. Whatever. We're still rooting for her.

Secondly, the Big Brother online diary. Often a source of endless amusement and insights into the psyche of the housemates, this entry just made our heart hurt.

Rima and Dixie are chatting in the lounge.

While the other HMs are fast asleep in the bedroom, Dixie and Rima bond in the lounge. Dixie tells Rima she thinks Renee is one of the most genuine people in the House. "She's no different in here to what she is in the real world," Dixie explains. Rima agrees, "The Aussies love that personality to win. They love it." Dixie says she hopes Renee wins. "I don't have any interest in playing the game," she says.

Already we're hearing the term "playing the game"? We'd make a Big Brother Clichéd Statements Bingo! card for the folks at home to print out and play along with during the next couple of weeks, but first we need to slice ourselves with a rusty knife, roll in salt, and then soak in a nice bath filled with lemon juice.

Finally, Corey Worthington is entering the house. And releasing a Beastie Boys cover. PUNCH US IN THE HEAD UNTIL WE LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS, PLEASE. Other than that amazing interview on Today Tonight, has Corey displayed any signs of being an entertaining character? Our only hope is that Corey uses his STUNNING PARTY THROWING SKILLS to somehow smuggle a bewildered bus of tourists expecting to go nuts at Wet & Wild into the compound and then gets them drunk enough to ensure the entire house is trashed beyond recognition and this year's crop of contestants are then forced to clean up $40,000 worth of damage by eviction night, or live in the squalor for the rest of the season.

Oh, and a shout out to Sonia Kruger - thanks for bigging up our opening night live blog on breakfast radio yesterday! Defamer Australia's Editor's mother is a Mix 106.5FM devotee and texted us saying "Sonia Kruger gave your blog defamer a plug this morning re big brother! She said it was so funny what HE wrote?"

Tina Sparkle, you have confused our mother. She now wonders whether she secretly birthed a boy child 27 years ago, and the charity haircut was a subtle way of breaking the news to her. For future reference, Defamer Australia is written by ladies, for ladies. Well, not really. But we've definitely got breasts.

PS: We secretly hope Tina Sparkle found the blog entry because it was sandwiched nicely between two Todd McKenney "pieces" and she'd been Googling his long weekend adventures to pass the time.

Just when you thought it was safe to don ridiculous yellow glasses and advertise your shindigs on Le Spazz without fear of being confused for Narre Warren's finest, it emerges that Corey Worthington Delany is not only back in our papers, but making serious cash from his reputation as a fun time guy with impressive abilities to advertise suburban house parties through the magic of text messaging and social networking sites.

Forget about his 15 minutes of fame, notorious party pest Corey Worthington is set to go global, having signed a lucrative endorsement deal with one of the largest mobile phone companies in the UK.

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Groan...

It was bad enough that Corey Worthington Delaney has been being paid to do DJ gigs and promotional appearances ("Add a touch of cockspankness to your function today! Call 1800-COREY now!") and hadn't actually been done away with when he was "bashed" in a shopping mall.

Now it seems that the cultural oracle that is MTV Australia has allowed him at least another few weeks in the spotlight with a nomination in the upcoming MTV Australia Awards:

In one of the more unconventional categories, the television moment award, Corey Worthington's A Current Affair interview will be up against Snoop Dogg's MTV citizenship campaign, The Chaser's War On Everything's APEC stunt, skateboarder Jake Brown's X-Games 45ft (15 metre) stack and stand, and A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila.

Happy to extend his 15 minutes of fame, Worthington said he was pleased to be up against fellow bad boy Snoop Dogg.

"It's cool to be considered for an MTV award, and to be included in such great company," he said.

"My vote's for one of my favourite acts, Snoop Dogg. I'd love to meet him."

Although Britain's Gemma Anscomb can't quite lure in the impressively high number of punters to a party that Corey Worthington/Delaney/MySpazz can (the alleged Narrewarren 300 being hard to top), we'd say the quality of the damage she caused to her parent's home after throwing a wild knees up while her folks were away more than makes up for the measly 50-something number of attendees to her do.

Highlights - or perhaps we should say lowlights - of Gemma's party include -

· A drugged out dog named Bailey ("He did eventually wake up, but for days he was very quiet, hardly moved and wouldn't eat his food," revealed a visibly distressed Mrs Anscomb yesterday. - and probably had a nasty bout of the Suicide Tuesdays to boot, poor pup. Drugging pets is not cool, kids!)
· Group sex on a washing machine.
· A £600 fridge scratched to bits with a knife.
· Beautiful cream carpet turned to black ("..soaked through with alcohol, mud, cigarette ends and chewing gum.")
· A dining room with a floor covered with four inches of beer (what a waste of perfectly good beer! Youngsters these days...)
· An eight year old girl's bedroom used for illicit sexings, with underwear left between the sheets and a pair of handcuffs remaining after the kinky jamberoo.
· A sixway shag session in the parent's bedroom.
· Perhaps most horrifying of all, 57 (57!!!!!) calls made on the home phone. And not a penny left to cover costs.

Read the whole story here.

Gemma, like Corey, has revealed she has no regrets about the party, stating on her Bebo page "Yeahh it [the party] went wrong but it was well good. . . I mean it was f****** good.", and - once again, like Corey - she hasn't returned home to face the wrath of her oldies.

We recommend the pair hook up on one of those social networking sites immediately. One poke leading to the odd message, and before you know it - it'll be the international teen wedding of the century. And imagine the reception! It'll be epic!

When reader Beth (thanks, by the way!) sent us in the following clip for our daily dose of YouTube idiocy and we saw the title of the piece was Corey Delaney: The Leader Of The Liberal Party, we thought "Oh no! We're over Corey, will we find this video amusing?"

The answer is yes, kids. Wonderfully put together, and Corey Worthington Delaney MySpazz Whateverthehellnameheisgoingby still delivers a less infuriating apology than Brendan Nelson.

Bravo, Beth!

Readers should send in their nominations for YouTube Clip Of The Day here.

We have been quite amused by The Papers and their glee over Tony Abbott's Corey-esque weekend adventures, when the former Government minister (it feels SO GOOD to type former, you know) had to deal with a horde of teenagers turning up to gatecrash his daughter's 15th birthday party. We dare say it's the first time a shindig at Tony Abbott's place has been a weekend must do.

Police were twice called to the Sydney Northern Beaches home of former federal health minister Tony Abbott last weekend when throngs of gatecrashers descended on his teenage daughter's birthday party.

Neighbours of the Abbotts yesterday said the sheer number of teenagers in the street was blocking access.

"They were all over the road. I was trying to drive down the street and I was frightened I would hit one of them," one woman said.

Others woke to find bottles and beer cans strewn across their lawns.

A resident across the road told of how distressed the Abbotts were when they saw at least 50 uninvited teenagers congregating outside their Forestville home.

Much like in the case of MySpazz party kid Corey, it appears the exact number of naughty would-be attendees at the soiree is a mystery - we've read 50, we've read 200 - but on the upside, Tony and the coppers handled things beautifully and there were no arrests.

At least two other parties were being held in nearby streets and it is understood the rogue guests wandered down under the misguided belief that Mr Abbott was holding an open house.

Mr Abbott confirmed "there were a few kids in the street who tried to gain admission to our daughter's party, but we didn't let them in".

"After a while the police suggested they move on and I must say the police did a terrific job," he said.

We particularly enjoyed the description of the gatecrashers as "rogue guests" and plan to add the term to our vernacular immediately.

The idea that a former member of John Howard's government would have an open door policy when it comes to folk looking for a better place to go is indeed "misguided".

Incidentally, last night we hosted our pub trivia evening and included a question about Tony Abbott's Corey-moment. A friend who had been overseas for a couple of weeks asked "Who's Corey?" and we were flabbergasted. Was there really a time when Corey was just a name, and not another way of saying "Massive party, dudes!"?

Suffice to say that laughs have been a bit thin on the ground this past few weeks, so we were mightily pleased when the following item popped up in our Facebook News Feed, and had us laughing into next year:

In case you missed the punchline, please let our art department's technical wizardry explain the joke to you in a little more detail:

Feel like organising a maxi-taxi to Narre for the night? Here are the deets!

However, we assume "Da Partaaayy God" will be doing the right thing - a la "We're having a 21st tonight and just wanted to let you know" - and calling the police in advance this time.

Defamer Australia, like most normal people, lost interest in the Corey Delaney Worthington story a couple of days after it broke. Kid has party, kid is a smart arse to smarmy television host and becomes world wide YouTube hit, kid gets arrested, kid continues to ride the publicity wave all the way to the bank... Exciting stuff, to be sure.

But when we heard Zoo Weekly were auctioning off his famous sunglasses, we thought two things.

1) If you bid and win Corey's stupid glasses, you are officially a fuckwit.

2) Is the money going to charity? Specifically, the Further Breast Enlargements For Krystal Forscutt Fund?

Now we learn Corey's been beaten up by a "gang" of teenagers (it's all Bloods and Crips out there at Fountain Gate shopping centre).

Party pest Corey Worthington has been caught on camera taking part in a "pre-arranged" fight with a group of teenagers near a Melbourne shopping centre. The Narre Warren teen was filmed on a mobile phone camera trading blows with other teenagers at a park near Fountain Gate shopping centre on Monday afternoon.

"Chris, give it to him," one onlooker is heard to say on the footage shown on Channel 9's A Current Affair last night.

An unnamed witness said a fight broke out and Chris started hitting Corey in the face.

"The fight broke out when I got to the oval. Chris started like hitting him in the face, kneeing him in the face," he said. "The group didn't like him.

"Corey walked past the group that didn't like him. It was a sort of planned fight. He came with all his friends to fight. He thinks he's all that because he's famous now."

Kids, eh?