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NYT Reporter David Rohde And The Great Taliban Escape
12:45PM Foster Kamer | New York Times reporter David Rohde was held hostage by the Taliban for over seven months before he escaped. The Times coordinated a media blackout on the story to protect Rhode. Rohde’s publishing it in the Times. It’s pretty incredible. More »
‘Watchmen’ Teaser Debuts to Utter Confusion, Slight Ear Pain
7:40AM Defamer Hollywood | In a summer where we seemingly can’t go a full day without facing down some newer, denser wave of comic-book effluvia, the recently released Watchmen teaser is up there among the more nerve-rattling encounters we’ve endured. It may just be the destabilizing Billy Corgan whine, or poor Billy Crudup writhing in CGI anguish, or the idea that Zack Snyder is actually the “visionary director of 300” to which the ad copy refers. Or maybe it’s just that the only teasers that seem to captivate our attention any longer feature either vaguely racist chihuahua dance numbers, Brad Pitt aging backwards in Spanish or some permutation of men saving Earth — usually brooding and often in slow-motion. Maybe it’s just that we need to get out more. In any case, here you go. Did we mention Billy Corgan whines? Never mind. [Empire] More »
New ‘Mamma Mia!’ Trailer Plays Up Streep Slut Humor, Vaguely Swedish Noise
7:44AM Defamer Hollywood | No sooner did the Universal logo appear onscreen than straight men around the world shrugged at the sight of the new Mamma Mia! trailer, a glittering, sensory-overloading hint at this summer’s forthcoming tribute to the revolving institutions of ABBA, Meryl Streep, and general gayness. More »
Beowulf Marketing Team Deems Product Perfectly Suited for Public Storage Facility
6:45AM Defamer Hollywood | Should we be surprised that the largest visual Beowulf marketing placement in Tinseltown is a customised gift-wrap of the Public Storage facility squatting at the corner of Santa Monica and Highland? Nay! The well-researched placement is simply Paramount’s attempt to sequester a share of the eyeballs normally reserved for Apple’s longstanding “We are fucking huge, and we are here to stay” tribute to dancing and antisocial >> behaviour directly across the street. More »
David Hasselhoff Given Inevitable E! Show
4:30AM Defamer Hollywood | Today, the creative dream team of American Idol host/tireless megaproducer Ryan Seacrest and America’s Got Talent judge/off-key finale-stealer David Hasselhoff have announced their promising collaboration on Tales From the Hoff, a scripted E! series that should provide a much-needed respite from the celebrity-fellating network’s nonstop countdown-related programming. If you’ve ever furrowed a brow at the actor’s repeated attempts at sustaining a post-Baywatch show business career and thought to yourself, “This man’s sad quest to remain relevant to a generation that’s never even heard of Knight Rider would make a darkly funny television show,” then this upcoming project will quickly find itself on your Season Pass list, according to Var: More »
Opportunistic Producer To Dramatise The Greatest Hits Of Your Favourite Celebrity Trainwrecks
7:00AM Defamer Hollywood | Hoping to further exploit the seemingly inexhaustible demand for stories about the Denali-jacking, coke-panted, briefly-incarcerated-but- frequently-rehabbed starlets whose misadventures move as much tabloid product as the public can choke down, producer Joe Nasser – you may know him as the mastermind responsible for the upcoming Willa Ford vehicle Anna Nicole – today announces his intention to eventually bring Celebutard: The Motion Picture (inferior working title: Hollywood Brats) to the big screen. Reports the Times: “It’s all about these girls in Hollywood getting into trouble,” Nasser said. “You see them all go to jail, you see them get arrested, you see them go through trials and tribulations.” More »New Technology Helps Angelina Jolie Return To Her Nudity-Positive Cinematic Past
3:50AM Defamer Hollywood | [Note: video possibly NSFW] The release of the red-band trailer for Beowulf finally provides a promising demonstration of the powerful motion-capture technology director Robert Zemeckis has been trying to perfect over the last handful of years. While earlier versions of his moviemaking technique were able to produce nothing more impressive than disturbingly dead-eyed, animated children in The Polar Express and somewhat less disturbingly dead-eyed, animated children in Monster House, the director’s mainframes can now generate computer-enhanced images of a naked, golden Angelina Jolie so compellingly lifelike that audiences will momentarily forget about all the fantasy-destroying, do-gooding baggage she’s accumulated since acquiring her debilitating orphan-collecting addiction. Beowulf Uncensored Internet Trailer [YouTube] More »
