Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 8:05 AM on April 26, 2008
The 24 hours since Wesley Snipes's three-year prison sentence for tax evasion have allowed for some perspective-gathering among the crack legal analysts at Defamer HQ. Sifting through the wreckage, we think we've discovered the key weak spots in the Snipes defence that, if only someone had acted sooner, could have kept our 18th (19th?) favourite action star a free man. Don't let this happen to you; follow the jump for a glimpse at the Chuck Norris factor and other Achilles' heels in Snipes's strategy.
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Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 6:42 AM on January 5, 2008
For anyone with even a remotely legitimate interest in yesterday's historic Iowa caucus, we refer you to our Beltway brothers' coverage over at Wonkette. We, on the other hand, are purely fixated on how the celebrity factor figures into Barack Obama and Mike Huckabee being handed such landslide mandates for change from voters in the corn-shucking state. Huckabee's acceptance speech--capped by a funky improvisational jazz bass performance loosely inspired by the Barney Miller theme--was greeted by longtime kung-fu sparring companion Chuck Norris, hovering over his shoulder with the kind of warmly proud look one typically associates with future First Ladies. The Democratic side, meanwhile, benefited from a far bustier and less hirsute celebrity endorsement:
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Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 8:15 AM on December 19, 2007
Christian chop-socker and 2007's "Most Forwarded" Chuck Norris sat down with Larry King last night to share his opinions about who should run the free world. It's Mike Huckabee. So, when you're in the booth next year, about to press flesh to Diebold, remember: Chuck Norris endorses Mike Huckabee. (You might want to bookmark this page.) The mind reels at the the "Norris Facts"-esque gems inboxs will clog with over the coming year: "Mike Huckabee doesn't believe in creationism. He created it." "Mike Huckabee once quarantined and entire gay pride parade...with his bare hands." "Mike Huckabee doesn't cut taxes. He shames them into hara-kiri." Should you press play, stick around to the end where Chuck asserts that, were he to run for office, he'd choke every opponent unconscious. (Were he elected, he'd probably choke every terrorist unconscious before wrapping his hands around the uninsured, since it's safe to assume he'd run on a "choke all problems unconscious" platform.)
Walker, Texas Kingmaker · With these words, action star/political activist/internet demigod Chuck Norris abandons his own promising presidential candidacy and makes his official endorsement for the Republican nomination, pledging to saddle up and rise a conservative dark horse all the way to the White House: "A short time ago, I wrote in jest about what I would do if I am elected president. Of course, that was written all in good fun. Like most of you, over the summer and into the fall, I've been watching, listening, studying and praying about who could lead this country as our next president. I won't leave you in suspense. Though Giuliani might be savvy enough to lead people, Fred Thompson wise enough to wade through the tides of politics, McCain tough enough to fight terrorism and Romney business-minded enough to grow our economy, I believe the only one who has all of the characteristics to lead America forward into the future is ex-Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee." [World Net Daily via CNN Political Ticker]
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