cheyenne tozzi

Australia’s Next Top Unsubstantiated Host-Related Rumour

8:51AM Clem Bastow | After the whole ‘oh moy gourd, you guise, Jodhi Meares has totally quit Australia’s Next Top Model, this is soy upsetting’ fiasco, industry tattle talk has turned to discussing which leggy stunner will take over from the Tigerlilly designer in the show’s host/mentor role. So, while Foxtel remain tight-lipped and watercoolers at Portmans stores the country over are deep in considered conversation on the topic, the Tele’s Ros Reines offered her own theories on the topic: It is believed that the stunning Tozzi would fit the bill in hosting the model quest and bring so much to the small screen. More »

Brandon Davis Back To His Old Horrendous Ways… Erm, We Weren’t Aware He’d Given Them Up?

8:59AM Jess McGuire | Unfortunate news for karate champ Cheyenne Tozzi – her beau Brandon Davis, the man responsible for bringing the insult “FIRECROTCH” into the popular vernacular, is not a changed man after his recent stay in Sydney with his ladylove. It would seem he’s been running amuck in Florida now that he’s escaped the vigilant watch of his martial arts-skilled girlfriend. Word from the US is that, despite his recent “sober and slimmed down” appearance, the oil heir has slipped back to his greasy ways. Spies from South Beach Miami have told The New York Post they saw Davis in Florida nightclubs without Tozzi, “straddling girls and playing with their bras under their shirts”. Let’s not be too hard on Brandon and his bra fiddling ways. He was probably attempting to borrow the chesticle holders, not play with other women’s breasts. He’s still all yours, Cheyenne! More »

Cheyenne Tozzi Possibly Stupider Than We Originally Suspected

12:30PM Jess McGuire | Although we don’t know the woman from a bar of soap (what does she actually do these days, other than greasy oil heirs?), we’ve never thought of Cheyenne Tozzi as one of the brightest minds this country has produced, although a Wikipedia search informs us she and sister Tahyna Tozzi – as well as sharing parents who are apparently rather keen on giving their daughters monikers created by grabbing random letters from a bag of Scrabble pieces and putting them together as best they could – are Australian National Karate champs. Whatever. Cheyenne lets Brandon Davis place himself inside of her, and surely we can all agree that’s not the sign of an incredibly switched on woman? Now we hear the following snippet from Crown Towers. Cheyenne Tozzi and her playboy beau Brandon Davis have hit more bad luck, after arriving in Melbourne for the Millions Main Event tournament at Crown Casino. … Heading to the exclusive Mahogany Room instead, the cards didn’t fall much better for Davis or his gal pal, who won few friends among the hotel staff when the couple checked in. Sources tell Confidential the couple came with a list of demands at the neighbouring Crown Towers. Lobby spies say Tozzi was seen on Friday night ordering a Crown concierge to find her a charger for her mobile phone. But when she was told one was not available she demanded a digital camera instead. Poor Cheyenne… so dim, she thinks she can make phone calls from a digital camera. You can just see her putting her Canon camera to her ear and shouting “Hello? Hello? I can’t hear you at all, we must have a bad line!” as hotel staff roll their eyes and wish for a quick death. More »

Aussie Model’s Oily Boyfriend Detained On Suspicion Of Being The Little Man In The Peanut Butter Jar That Gave Millions Of ’80s Kids Nightmares

4:18PM Clem Bastow | Ho-hum Australian model Cheyenne Tozzi flew into Sydney with celebrity boyfriend Brandon Davis – aka Mr ex-Mischa Barton, and originator of the “firecrotch” dramz – to spend some quality time hanging out where the paparazzi are sure to make them both look important, but the gruesome twosome were held up at customs when it turned out Davis was planning on going buck wild down under. Loaded with US dollars, the 28-year-old was delayed for more than two hours, while his pin-up girlfriend became increasingly agitated while waiting in the arrivals area. “She was pacing around the whole time, with her mobile phone at her ear, trying to look anonymous,” a witness told The Daily Telegraph. “With her sunglasses on inside, everyone was looking at her.” A Customs spokesman declined to comment on individual passenger details for privacy reasons yesterday, but said travellers were required to declare if they were carrying more than $10,000 or the equivalent in foreign currency. Davis, who began dating the younger of the two Tozzi sisters last year, was finally allowed through to meet a waiting car and driver about 10.30am, after arriving on an 8am flight from the US. By that time, Tozzi had been collected by friends in another vehicle, leaving her wealthy beau behind. Davis was later spotted being accosted by some firemen who’d purchased some industrial strength, king-sized oil blotting sheets and were trying to roll him up in them. More »

Cop A Load Of These Celebrity Tatas – All In The Name Of Art, Maaaan!

10:42AM Clem Bastow | Australian artist David Bromley has unveiled his latest collection of portraits, a faintly naive jumble of sketchy nudes – posed for by Kate Ceberano, Cheyenne Tozzi, and Megan Gale, among other less interesting, non-A-list bosoms. And even though the paintings “retail” for around $16,000 (we’ve really got to get into this art jaunt! Check out these amazing portraits of Mel and Kochie that we did with a Sharpie and a packet of Cheese & Onion Pringles! That’ll be $25,000, thanks! Oh, sorry…), those kind folks over at News Ltd have hosted them all for you to feast your eyes on. Leap over the jump to gorge on Australia’s favourite Scientologist’s arty (and probably NSFW, unless you work at the Norman Lindsay Memorial Breast Examination Clinic) nungas. More »

The Ongoing Saga Of The Surfer And The Supermodel Reaches New, Sweary Heights

10:57AM Clem Bastow | In an effort to become more like NW, we told you the other day about the love triangle of Taj Burrows, Cheyenne Tozzi and Brandon Davis; well, now we have pro-surfer Burrows’ stance on the whole thing – which, it turns out, is a whole lot of *$#@!! (And no, we’ve not stopped swearing all of a sudden, we just like the old comic-book technique when it comes to accurately describing a particularly foulmouthed outburst.) The surfer dude poured his heart out to wave mag Stab, proving that gnarly tube-riders have feelings too, dude. Cowabunga. More »

Taj Wipes Out Cheyenne; We Do Not Know Any Other Surfing Terms With Which To Make The Witty Puns

11:26AM Clem Bastow | In a decision he will possibly live to regret, pro-surfer Taj Burrows has dumped “Our” Cheyenne Tozzi, celebutante and model, the blonde swimwear pony has revealed in a shoot and interview with GQ. Evidently Burrows wasn’t too keen to get any of Brandon “Oily Peanut Butter Man” Davis’ grease on him after Cheyenne was spotted lunching with the US heir-about-town. “Taj and I broke up – he’s an easy-minded pro-surfer and didn’t need the extra shit in his head. I said: ‘Look I know those pictures look damning…”‘ Just think, Taj, now the grease monster will be free to drape his sweaty paws all over your pretty Shire princess. Is this how you pictured your adult life when you were a child? IS IT? More »