celine dion

YouTube Knows Defamer Australia So Well…

1:14PM Jess McGuire | This just came up as a ‘Recommended For You’ clip on our YouTube home page. It’s described as “Voici un vidéo sur la magnifique histoire d’amour de…” which I think is French for “Assorted pictures of Celine Dion with some old dude.” I also love this comment: the part i love about this song is “i’ll paint a sun to warm your heart” back then it was meant a sun like from outside but now they have a child, a son. thats what it makes me think of. a child that brings us love. little rene charles True dat. More »

Celine Dion Does Not “Do” Australian Air

2:20PM Clem Bastow | With every passing day we’re starting to realise how much we actually love Celine Dion. A cursory glance through Defamer Australia’s history will reveal as much, but she’s just so lovably crazy we want to eat her up with a spoon! And her first few moments in Australia (on tour) are no exception to the rule, getting about like Michael Jackson (though we’re not sure whether it’s to stop her from infecting everyone else, or vice versa): Celine Dion brought back memories of the SARS days on the Gold Coast yesterday, appearing in a medical mask when leaving her luxury hotel with husband Rene Angelil and son Rene-Charles. The French-Canadian warbler has angered fans by postponing her Brisbane concert, due to a throat infection and “irritated sinuses”. Oh Celine! You had us at It’s All Coming Back To Me Now. Speaking of which, some mid-afternoon power balladry for you, after the jump! Motorcycles! Lightning! Possibly excessive use of wind machines! Enjoy! More »

Fear Not, Men Of The World: Celine Dion Has Waxed!

10:25AM Clem Bastow | Lordy… Remember the kerfuffle that blew up because Celine Dion dared to go onstage without submitting her body to a full hair removal session? Well, you’ll be “pleased” to know that she has capitulated to the gaze and made sure all that “unsightly” hair on her thighs is gone, daddy, gone. Now if she could just work on Third World poverty and maybe a cure for cancer, that would be ace. There’s a pet. Celine appeared to have taken care of all her grooming details, including waxing her thighs. And there was no repeat of the furry incident as the smooth-skinned French-Canadian star took to the stage looking completely fuzz-free. No doubt those poor, poor souls who had to witness her unwaxed thighs that night are looking into some sort of post-traumatic stress class action. It’s only reasonable, really. More »

Today In The Daily Mail’s Enduring Love And Support Of Womenkind

8:43AM Clem Bastow | You know how sometimes you go out on the weekend and see a pool of spew on a street corner, and then all of a sudden, having realised its existence, you start seeing vomit splats everywhere? We feel something vaguely similar about the Daily Mail and their treatment of female celebrities. Last week we noted their apparent shock that Celine Dion couldn’t be bothered waxing her thighs; today, we have these two clangers: We scoured the article for any quotes utilising the term “elephant legs”, but it was not to be. Thus, the Mail is apparently speaking for itself when it uses the term “elephant legs”. One more time: “elephant legs”. Charming, isn’t it? Next: Yeah, shut up, you ugly hag, go and hug your money! The Mail fail to see the irony in the juxtaposition of their continued “OMG hairy/fat/lesbian/other” campaigns and quoting SJP, no doubt in some misguided sense of sympathy, “Am I really the unsexiest women in the world? Wow! It’s kind of shocking when men… It’s so brutal in a way, so filled with rage and anger.” Any bets the men (and, sadly, probably the women) of the Mail staff have pinboards and dartboards at home covered by the photos of women who scorned them in, like, Grade Four? More »

World’s Press Shocked To Discover Women Actually Have Body Hair

9:30AM Clem Bastow | There’s nothing that riles us up more than when the press has a field day over a woman who chooses not to maintain her body hair to the same pre-pubescent standards as every other starlet (remember the Julia Roberts underarm fiasco?), and the latest victim in the war against full womanhood is Celine Dion. A “Celebrity Blogger” who shall not be named was the first to kick the “story” off, which we more or less expect given the quality nature of his blog, but we were dismayed to see that ‘proper’ news outlets followed on. To wit, the Daily Mail: Her face had been carefully made up, nails polished and outfit primped just so, but Celine Dion forgot one important thing before performing in Toyko over the weekend. It appeared the My Heart Will Go On singer had forgotten to wax her legs, with severe back lighting revealing their rather hairy state as she strutted around the stage. But despite the grooming oversight, she succeeded in wowing the crowd with a typically dazzling performance. New York’s Daily News got in on the beauty editor witch hunt, too. What?! She FORGOT TO WAX HER LEGS? We’re surprised there weren’t mass walk-outs and demands for refunds! Oh but, hold on, it’s okay – even though she was a hairy hosebeast, she still managed to sing well. Lucky for her… Unwaxed legs, what a complete affront to everyone’s senses. Perhaps these news dudes would like to book in for an upper-thigh wax, and then see whether they still feel that Dion “forgot” to carry out what they seem to be implying is a basic necessity, or whether they’d rather stick pencils in their eardrums than slather themselves in hot wax before yanking out their body hair. More »

Celine Dion’s Leg Hair: It’s All Coming Back To Her Now

8:50AM Seth | International ambassador of the ancient Quebecois artform of chest-thump singing Celine Dion was nabbed by an unfeeling British tabloid press recently. Her crime: performing to a Tokyo crowd sporting a pair of unwaxed legs, giving her the aura of a power-ballad-belting kiwifruit when exposed to harsh backlighting. It’s precisely this kind of music industry double-standard (Tom Jones had to insure his chest against depilatory acts of God) that really makes us appreciate all that goes into being a French Canadian diva, and resist our reflexive instinct to make greatest-hits-inspired jokes (”I Drove All Night (To Find An Open Drug Store Selling Venus Razors),” “(What Do You Say To) Taking Personal Grooming Chances,” etc…) at the singer’s expense. Hair-raising: Celine Dion takes to the stage with furry legs [Daily Mail] More »

Top 10 Worst Of The Worst Of The Worst Oscar Outfits (Have No Fear, Swan Head Is Here)

6:23AM Molly Friedman | Yes, sadly, it’s that time again. Time to stare into the lifeless abyss that is the Swan Dress. But Bjork’s legendary snafu has friends! Like Celine Dion’s Backwards Suit, Gwyneth Paltrow’s Saggy Boob Goth Gown and Corey Feldman’s Hammer Pants. All have appeared at one Oscars showdown or another, and all are here for your enjoyment once again. More »

Celine Dion To Reveal The Woman In Her In Shocking CBS Expose

6:08AM Defamer Hollywood | Steve Jobs announced at Macworld that every major studio would now offer movies for rental on iTunes. $3.99 per new release gives you 30 days to start it, then 24 hours to finish it, and a virtually limitless amount of time to bitch about how you just blew $3.99 of beer money on Norbit. [THR] At last, Oprah Winfrey gets her OWN network: The Oprah Winfrey Network. (Get it? OWN?) When it debuts in 2009, look for her to select it as the Channel of the Month for her newly formed Oprah’s TV Club, ensuring boffo launch ratings. [THR] With the one-two foam-baton punch of Deal or No Deal and American Gladiators, NBC easily swept up in the ratings last night, a victory they have a few hours to savor before Fox unleashes a rampaging, 70-foot Abdulosaur upon the TV landscape. [THR] The High School Musical gang has signed on for another sequel, High School Musical 3: Senior Year, which will escape from the basic cable ghetto to premiere in theaters. [Variety] Celine Dion: That’s Just the Woman in Me, a special taped Saturday at the Wiltern will air Feb. 15 on CBS. We realize this isn’t a groundbreaking announcement, but it did provide a nice excuse to run that ridiculous photo. [Variety] More »

Sometimes… There Are No Words

4:18PM Clem Bastow | We know, we know, two laffworthy UK tabloid-related pieces in quick succession, but we couldn’t let this one pass you by: You’ll thank us one day, we’re quite sure of it. More »

When Two Long-Faced Divas Collide…

10:33AM Clem Bastow | Recently sexed-up songstress Delta Goodrem has been dealt a good hand, with Celine Dion requesting to record a song Our Delta wrote last year. In case you don’t know who Celine Dion is, the French Canadian warbler has sold a few records here and there, so this could mean a significant cash injection for Goodrem if Dion chooses it as a single. Goodrem wrote Eyes On Me last year with Swedish hitmaker Kristian Lundin who has penned hits for the Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears. It was originally meant for her upcoming third album, Delta, but did not make the cut. It was then offered to Dion, who chose to record it for her comeback album Taking Chances which is out on November 10. We’re pleased for Delta’s bank balance, but really, if the powers of Dion and Delta combine, won’t it tear a hole in the space/time fabric or something? Get ready for cats and dogs living together in mass hysteria! More »