When we last popped over to pop star and errant awards ceremony host Lily Allen's MySpazz blog, she was heading out to get a colonic irrigation. The perfect cure for any Large Hadron Collider fears one might be "internalising"!

In her latest post for online pals, she reveals she's happy, she can't wait for this year to be over (you can't blame her, all things considered - I'm personally completely with her on that one. Two thousand and hate can go and fist itself into oblivion, I'm hankering already for two thousand and fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine), and guess which one of the Kings Of Leon she's got the lady-horn for? Oh! And there's a dollop of opinion when it comes to US politics too!

I'm off to paris for the weekend, so excited. I love paris, and the sun is shining, it's going to be beautiful, im gonna listen to Kings of leon ,TV on the radio and the new Roots Manuva album on the plane.

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Lily Allen, my favourite celebrity MySpazz blogger (well, it's really between her and Courtney Love, and Lily comes out on top due to the fact you can actually make out what she's saying most of the time), has once again used her login powers to inform her gazillions of friends that she most definitely did not engineer a wardrobe malfunction in order to garner some publicity. She just happened to be bra-less on a warm day, and these things just happen!

hello , i wore a loose fitting t shirt yesterday . I was very hot in London yesterday , and it's no secret I don't like wearing bras , besides i don't need to, measuring in at 32A it hardly seems necessary .My boob fell out twice and people on the blogs are saying it was a publicity stunt . Can I just say , i have been keeping myself very much to myself recently , i've been gardening , decorating my new flat and looking after my greiving grandfather .

Note the reference to her grieving grandfather - a nicely timed reminder that Lily only recently lost her grandmother, and therefore folk flinging accusations of street sluttery in her direction should feel doubly, nay - triply ashamed of themselves.

More of Lily after the jump.

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"Adventure tourism" is a concept that I never really 'got', to be honest; if I'm going to have a holiday, chances are I'd rather spend it vegetating than risking death in a small sardine tin while being pelted down a waterfall in the middle of tornado season (or whatever).

However, when it comes to travel writing about adventure tourism, I appreciate the need to create a sense of danger, excitement, and living on the edge, maaan. Perhaps that's what happened to SMH blogger Sam De Brito when he went on a shark dive - in a tank.

Recently, I had the opportunity to swim with the man-eaters at Mooloolaba's Underwater World and it ranks as one of the most surreal, challenging half hours of my life.

If you've ever been paddling or surfing in the ocean and spotted a nearby shark, you'll know it's about as chilling a feeling as you can experience; every fibre of your being screams "GET OUT OF THE WATER, NOW!"

To voluntarily induce this meeting of man and fish thus runs counter to millions of years of evolution. Much like skydiving or driving very fast, your body knows you shouldn't be doing it and to cope, coughs out primal chemicals which provide that rush adrenaline junkies hunt for.

Sinking into the busy blue of the Underwater World aquarium and seeing an eight foot shark cruising towards me put a lot of things in perspective. Whatever stresses and concerns I had prior to entering the water disappeared the moment I looked into the completely remorseless eye of a sand bar whaler.

Except for one thing: unless the sandbar shark thought Sam was a mollusc, it actually probably would've been pretty remorseful after all.

Underwater World's own PR describes the dive experience as featuring "large but docile grey nurse sharks, sandbar whaler sharks, wobbegongs and bamboo sharks", while according to the clearly learned people at the International Shark Attack Files, sandbar sharks have been responsible for "a total of 7 recorded attacks since 1580 with no deaths". Now, I'm no mathematician, but 7 attacks in the last 428 years sounds like pretty wide odds to me.

But then again, "I had the opportunity to swim with the bottom-dwelling-fish-eaters" doesn't really cut it in the adventure travel writing stakes, does it?

The best thing we ever did was subscribe to Ryan Adams' Tumblr blog. We've spent the last few days inflicting repeated viewings of his videos on friends (check this clip out - WE LOVE HIM SO MUCH) and his random ramblings make our heart swell too.

In this entry, Ryan talks about the time he met the new Mr Beyonce, hip hop superstar Jay-Z.

He made a video for Jay-Z. Beyonce' showed up. Which makes him very close to a religious icon in my opinion.

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Oh, John Mayer. With each passing day, we here at Defamer fall a little more in love with you.

Here's John's latest blog entry.

Guffaw!

Oh happy day, citizens of Nerdistan. For it was written that one amongst us would be chosen to entertain the masses with pithy social commentary and weekly question and answer sessions and be celebrated for this kind dorky activity, and so it is today we learn Ms Fits (also known as Triple J breakfast host Marieke Hardy) has won herself a Bloggie at the Eighth Annual Weblog Awards!

Hardy said she hadn't expected to receive any awards for the blog, where she posts a mix of wry observations and left-wing political commentary as the cynical Ms Fits.

"I'm still somewhat surprised about it all, to be honest. I wasn't expecting to win any prizes for my semi-regular inane internet rantings," Hardy said today.

"At least now I can tell my parents my little hobby has paid off."

We asked her for an official statement for Defamer Australia readers, which she promptly gave us.

"Christ."

Thank you, Ms Fits.

Better go and read the News Ltd article if you want proper quotes and stuff.

In any case, we suppose whoever put forward the winning bid in the recent eBay auction for a night on the town with Marieke Hardy will be pleased. We suggest marking her price up, and selling her on.

While Defamer is running our own live Oscars blog, we're not immune to cruising the web to see what "the other half" are doing with cinema's big day.

During our travels via the Vogue Forums we were most pleased to see that NineMSN had given our favourite Australian designer and hilarious Australia's Next Top Model judge ("Those eyebrows have been raped") Alex Perry his own live Oscars red carpet arrivals blog.

Feel free to browse by yourself, but we've collated some of Alex's more considered moments of serious fashion commentary for you here:

11:51am:Calista Flockhart and her grandfather She's looking a bit scary..

11:40am:Tilda Swinton It's a great big bag what's to LIKE. Don't put any makeup on you albino!

11:35am:Jennifer Hudson sHE just unleashed a white gladiator dress, unfortunately the white jersey couldn't contain her boobs, they look like white pointers one to the east and one to the west.

11:32am:Helen Mirren I can't believe I'm seeing a dress that is red satin with white lace, it's not friggin christmas honey and she looked so amazing last year, but this year she looks WRONG.

11:25am: Kimora Lee Can I also add she looks like a Phillipino hooker.

11:05am: John Travolta has a droopy suit on and too long sideburns, slightly Amish looking.

The Australian fashion world needs more talk of white pointer boobs, Amish sideburns and Filipino hookers.

Victorian blogger Hamish Jones made the news this morning after he was forced to stand down as the Liberal candidate for Maribyrnong following the revelation he'd said some rather unflattering things about Labor's Lynne Kosky on his now-deleted blog Ranting And Rambling.

A Liberal candidate for this year's federal election has been forced to stand down after describing Victorian Transport Minister Lynne Kosky as a "bitch" and "f---wit" on his blog. Hamish Jones, 24, was the Liberal candidate for the safe Labor seat of Maribyrnong, where he was pitted against ALP heavyweight Bill Shorten.

But Mr Jones quit after it emerged that he had abused Ms Kosky in his blog, Ranting and Rambling, in April. He was responding to an email Ms Kosky had sent to her state colleagues, saying that they should not refer their constituents' complaints about public transport to her. Instead, she advised them to go directly to the private operators of the public transport system or the ombudsman.

When the blog remarks were brought to the attention of state Liberal director Julian Sheezel, he immediately told Mr Jones such comments were unacceptable, leaving him no option but to quit. The blog last night appeared to have been taken down.

Mr Sheezel told The Age last night: "Hamish Jones had a blog which contained inappropriate and unacceptable material. His candidacy was untenable."

If using the term "fuckwit" in an idiotic online rant against someone with a different political ideology makes ones candidacy in an election "untenable", then our future political career is fucking cunted.

Well, unless we join the Labor Party.

(Here's Google's cache of Ranting And Rambling which contains the controversial post in question - scroll down to April 12th)