bindi irwin

Aussie Hip Hop Star Bindi Irwin Excitedly Talks About Her Exciting 10th Birthday Celebrations: “I’m Very Excited!”

11:44AM Jess McGuire | Rap star, Logie winner, fashion icon, and queen of Australian tourism Ms Bindi Irwin has, on the eve of her 10th birthday, been interviewed by The Courier-Mail – and boy, is she excited about turning double digits! Using the words “I’m very excited” at least 12 times in as many minutes, she said: “Our tradition is that birthdays are not just for yourself but for sharing. “Every birthday is very exciting – you wake up in the morning so excited because everyone is coming. It’s so exciting I can’t wait. Double digits means double the fun which is so exciting.” Uh-huh. Exciting stuff! I also quite enjoyed her views on her simple living brother Bob-Bob. (Bindi) said she preferred to focus on the good things in the world and believed in the simple philosophy often demonstrated by her younger brother, Robert, 4, who liked to live in the moment. “Robert has a great approach to life,” she said. “He lives one day at a time and doesn’t worry about what will happen in the future. He just likes to play with his chickens and revels in the moment which is happening . . . which is a good way to be. An uncomplicated four year old – I’ll be damned! I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again – Robert “Bob Bob” Irwin is my great hope for the future of not only Australia Zoo, but Australia itself. Although the way Bindi’s taken to describing him in this interview, I can’t help but suspect we might lose him for a couple of years to the Nimbin massive as he explores the appeal of certain herbs and tries his hand at African drumming. More »

Bindi Irwin Is A Winner!

1:25PM Jess McGuire | After last night’s Logies, Bindi Irwin can add another piece of hardware to the trophy cabinet, and no doubt she’s making some room in there in anticipation of receiving one of those awkwardly shaped ARIAs in a couple of months time. Two things I would like to note. Firstly – An excitable and articulate Bindi said she was shocked to win. “This is so exciting. I can’t believe it,” she said on accepting the gong at Melbourne’s Crown Entertainment Complex. I’d definitely like to dedicate this to my mum and dad, and I would also like to thank everybody out there who helped to watch Bindi: the Jungle Girl. It’s so nice and I’d also like to thank John Stainton, who has helped me all the way through. Thank you very much. Eeeeeeee!” Yep. Even seeing it in the written form, that blood-curdling scream of glee (perhaps a shout out in her native tongue, Animalese, to her four legged supporters watching from their enclosures at Australia Zoo?) still makes me shudder a little bit in fright. Secondly – Bindi has already decided where her Logie is going. “Straight to the pool room,” she said. Oh, Bindi. Regurgitating one liners from beloved Australian films will not be enough to endear you to the Australian public. You scare them. But what can you do? You know no other life than to perform for the camera. Just like Britney. Can we really judge you for doing that which you were born and raised to do? Yes. It freaks us out. More »

Bindi Irwin Hopes Australian Children Want To Wear Her Beautiful Skin… Sorry, Clothes

9:22AM Clem Bastow | Despite what you may glean from her perma-enthused persona, Bindi Irwin is not actually a cyborg child from planet Goblin just like the rest of us: she gets nervous when her pet project is laid on the line for the children of Australia to judge (i.e. with their parents’ money). That’s right, Bindi’s new Bindi Wear International range of branded clothing debuts at Myer stores this week, and the crimping iron fan is hanging out to see how her range of sensible slacks goes down with the little’uns. While the label was officially launched at the Magic clothing fair in the US in August, Australia is the first country where the clothes for babies and girls and boys up to 12 will go on sale. “I am so excited to have my own range, I can’t wait to see other kids wearing it,” Bindi, 9, said. In its first real test before it hits stores, two fashion-loving Sydney sisters put the range of cool and khaki clothes to the test. Avid Bindi fan Hannah Stevenson, 5, loved that there was more than khaki in this collection, with a pink-dappled camouflage dress with front bow and ruffled skirt one of her top choices. While it was a pretty piece, it was in a canvas material and was tough enough to endure jumping off the garden fence at her Croydon home, one of her favourite activities. Canvas! Great! Isn’t that the childrenswear equivalent of, dunno, a kero bath for nanna? Like, sure, kids’ clothes need to be durable, but canvas? What next, chainmail? Here you go, little Johnny, wrap yourself up in this nice, snuggly Kevlar dressing gown! The label says it’s stingray-proof! More »

Bob Bob Bitten By A Snake!

9:49AM Jess McGuire | We damn near had a heart attack when we read yesterday afternoon that little Bob Bob Irwin, the golden haired replica doll-less child we’re pinning all our conservation hopes on, had been bitten by a snake! The 4-year-old son of Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin was not at all alarmed when he was recently bitten by a baby boa constrictor, according to his mother. “He picked one of them up and it bit him on the finger, and he was so proud to have copped his first hit,” Irwin’s widow, Terri, said today at an appearance at the FAO Schwarz toy store with her two children to promote a new line of toys. Obviously we shouldn’t have been too afraid for Bob Bob’s welfare. Let’s face it, once you’ve faced off with a crocodile whilst still being physically unable to hold your own head up and lived to tell the tale, something as trivial as a snake isn’t going to faze you one little bit, although the Pete Doherty-ish use of the words “copped his first hit” worries us slightly, as it paints a tragic picture of an older Bob Bob becoming an adrenalin junkie, taking unnecessary risks and performing death defying feats for the cameras. And we all know where that leads… We’re pleased Bob Bob was switched on enough to ask an all important question once he “copped his first hit”. “He said, ‘I hope it wasn’t venomous’, so I assured Robert I wouldn’t actually let him play with venomous snakes,” she said. At least he’s learned from the mistakes of the past and has no intentions of messing with venomous creatures for kicks. We’re also chuffed that mother Terri would never have him play with a poisonous snake, choosing instead to go for a more constricting beast. Terri Irwin said the couple’s 9-year-old daughter, Bindi, was first bitten by a snake when she was 18-months old. The girl, who is featured in the Discovery Kids Channel show Bindi the Jungle Girl, posed for cameras with a new action figure in her likeness. Typical. Anything Bob Bob can do, Bindi can do better. “Bitten at 4-years-old? Dude, please. By four years of age, I was cage fighting with Siberian tigers, eating live red back spiders for breakfast, and hot wiring vehicles in the Australia Zoo car park in order to joyride with delinquent chimpanzees. Crikey! Word to yo motha!” Don’t get too comfortable on that throne, missy, surrounded by your mindless lackeys and assorted dolls. Bob Bob will have his day, mark our overly dramatic and completely ridiculous words… More »

Bob Bob Now The Only Irwin Family Member Without A Doll In His Likeness, Continues To Be Our Small Blonde Hope For Australia Zoo

7:06AM Jess McGuire | Because we’re just in that sort of mood this morning, we’d like to begin by looking at the positives in this article regarding Bindi Irwin’s new incarnation as a talking doll. Firstly, Dark Crystal fans, Bindi is still being officially classified as human. Says mother Terri “She is still a nine-year-old human being. She is a real girl,” which is comforting – if there’s one thing Terri Irwin knows about, it’s the classification of animal species. Secondly, Bindi is like a Mr Chips for nature-obsessed children. Continues Terri “She takes being a role model seriously, she equates what she does with being a teacher, like her teacher Miss Emma.” Please note, it is highly unlikely Miss Emma is a plump affable middle-aged human tutor with a heart of gold, but rather some kind of hyper-intelligent monitor lizard from Papua New Guinea who communicates with Bindi using a complex combination of tail flicks and text messaging. At best, Miss Emma is a strict but wise orangutan. Australia Zoo only allows four human members of staff on the grounds at the one time, and the merch store requires many human fingers to handle the complex EFTPOS machine. Thirdly, Terri does not want Bindi to grow up feeling different from other children, even though, you know, Bindi is quite rich, famous, lives in a Zoo, and is completely different from pretty much every other child her age. Mrs Irwin was left to launch the doll, which plays recorded messages from Bindi, at a New York toy fair alone after organisers banned children. Bindi and her mother declined a special offer to allow her to attend because other children were unable to see the wonderland of toys. “They said they would make an exception for Bindi, I said ‘No thank you, I don’t want Bindi to grow up being the exception’,” Mrs Irwin said. We fear it will be quite impossible to imagine a room full of kids where Bindi wouldn’t be considered the odd one out, but whatever. Noble sentiments from Terri Irwin. Alright, now we must get to the more disturbing aspects of the article. Bindi saw the dolls, which repeat favourite sayings such as “love it, don’t hurt it”, on Saturday night in New York and told her mother it was every girl’s dream to have their own doll. Bindi’s favourite saying is “love it, don’t hurt it”? We cannot personally come up with anything more horrendous and frightening than the idea of being surprised by a small doll with Bindi Irwin features which repeatedly howls “LOVE IT DON’T HURT IT” in our direction but hey, that’s just us. Bindi’s young brother Robert is the only family member not to have a doll, with dolls of Mrs Irwin and her crocodile hunter husband already on sale. Oh, Bob Bob. You continue to keep it so real. With Bob Bob, it’s all about the conservation, you know? Not the trappings of fame like dolls and spin off rap projects (although we still want Bindi to win the ARIA for Best Urban Release this year) and meddling in Britney Spears’ troubled life. Keep on keepin’ on, Bob Bob. More »

While We Wholeheartedly Believe The Irwins Are Wonderful People With The Ability To Change The World For The Better, Even We’re Sceptical Their Animal Loving Ways Can Help The Troubled Britney Spears

11:53AM Jess McGuire | Could it be true? Are Terri and Bindi (“And Bob Bob, what am I, chopped liver?” – Bob Bob) Irwin actually trying to get Britney Spears to visit them Down Under for a rejuvenating jaunt in the Outback? Terri Irwin has offered troubled American pop singer Britney Spears the chance to escape Hollywood for the Australian bush, according to online reports today. On websites such as PR-inside.com, the widow of Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin has been quoted as admitting she and her family have been watching the madness surrounding Spears in recent months and believe the singer should head to Australia for a break with nature. “Bindi’s the one who said: ‘People who are having trouble should go in the bush with us when we do our crocodile research work’,” Mrs Irwin reportedly told the website “If Britney and her family want to go in the bush with us, we’d love to have them.” Oh, Bindi’s idea, was it? This makes much more sense. It has very little to do with helping Britney Spears get through this difficult period in her life, and everything to do with Bindi’s burgeoning gangster rap career. Obviously the Cockmen Crocmen aren’t delivering the goods on stage, and Bindi is envisioning Britney joining her on a worldwide B&B tour, where the mother of two will act as Dido to Bindi’s Eminem, offering up catchy hooks and the occasional dance routine while Bindi “spits” about playa haters and whale conservation. More »

Bindi Irwin for Best Urban Release At The 2008 ARIAs

10:16AM Jess McGuire | The other day, Defamer Australia’s Editor and Associate Editor were thrilled to open our mail and discover a copy of the Bindi Irwin single ‘Trouble In The Jungle’. “Ah ha!” we though to ourselves, “just what every pop culture obsessed Australian in their mid-twenties could ever want – a bouncing musical number about conservation!” We popped it on, ad lo and behold… we discovered something we were NOT expecting. Bitch can rhyme in a phat manner, yo. Seriously. Before we received a copy of her new rap single, we had simply filed Bindi Irwin away in the Things We Don’t Really Understand section of our brain, alongside “Sneaky Sound System’s Continuing Career Success” and “Why Our Boy Puppy Pees Like A Girl”. But now? It’s all hideously clear. Bindi was born to deliver the flow. The beginning of the track sounds like something the Hilltop Hoods could have released, but when Bindi unleashes her panda-related tirade (”Mr Panda, whatchoo gonna do? Cos as man expands there’s no bamboo for you to chew through…“) it suddenly hits you – she was put on this earth to rap. Give her twenty years, a break down, a possible drug habit, and some time with Dr Dre, and we’ve no doubt we’ll see Bindi’s full Compton-esque potential fulfilled. In the meantime, could she please re-record Trouble In The Jungle with the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra? IT WOULD BE AMAZING! Here’s a clip of Bindi delivering the goods LIVE on the Today show, with thanks to Jezebel. REPRESENT! If she doesn’t win the Best Urban Release award at next year’s ARIAs, we’re gonna choke a bitch. PS: If you would like to send us stuff to look at, listen to, touch, eat, or call the police regarding – you can do so via our charming overlords at Allure Media. More »