aleisha

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

An Appearance On Big Brother Can Lead To Lifelong Friendships/Sharing Of Leases

11:58AM Jess McGuire | This is nice to know, isn’t it? They were besties in the Big Brother house, now Aleisha Cowcher and Emma Cornell are living together once again. Proving friendship can survive outside the Gold Coast compound, Cowcher, from Cobram in rural Victoria, has shacked up with the fitness instructor in an Eastern Suburbs apartment. Even though we thought Emma was diabolical when she appeared on last year’s season of Big Brother (remember last year? We barely do…), we were assured by a Big Brother employee that she was nowhere near as heinous as we believed her to be, and Jamie was a thousand times worse than any of us could have imagined. We’ve never met the sob-happy D&D fan though, so we’ll reserve judgement for now. More regarding Aleisha, please! Now her BB appearances are finally over, the bubbly blonde hairdresser is looking for a job as well as battling traffic out to Castle Hill to visit her lad Kris “Billy” Bentley. Your Editor grew up out in the Hills District, so we will be sure to keep an ear to the ground regarding tales of Billy and Aleisha gyrating awkwardly on the dancefloor at the Tav (“It’s happening at the Tavern, the Castle Hill Tavern, it’s happening at the TAVERN toniiiiiiiight” – whaddajingle!) and any potential illicit carpark fondles at The Mean Fiddler. More »
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Thursday, July 12, 2007
Monday, July 2, 2007

Jamie Gets Our Hopes Up In His Goodbye Message

5:04PM Jess McGuire | For a very brief moment, we thought Jamie had very succinctly torn Joel a new one in his goodbye video. Joel. Joel, I really don’t like you I never have. We gasped in excitement, but further down the transcript, the truth was revealed. Joel, I was only joking, you know that. You’re more than just a funny guy. Let everyone see the real Joel. Whip him out, let everyone have a look. That’s all I can say. Because we’re bitterly disappointed Jamie’s farewell message didn’t contain anything controversial, we’re going to choose to believe that his last instruction to Joel – “Whip him out, let everyone have a look…” – is about Joel’s penis. In other news, how’s the homo-erotic tension between Joel and Billy? Huh? It can’t be just us who saw it on the Daily Show last night! They run out to the back yard to hold each other, they love nothing better than stripping off and spa-ing together… they are definitely secretly bumming each other and Aleishshaisheesshsseaaaaaaaa or whatever the fuck her name is has been employed by Billy as a beard in true Scientology fashion. Perhaps he is bribing her with lollies he saved from the period he was nicking stuff from the other housemates? We don’t bloody know. We just like a good, ridiculous conspiracy theory now and then. It makes things more tolerable and infinitely more watchable once you’re madly hunting for a rainbow-coloured subtext in every interaction. More »
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