afl

AFL Surprisingly Not Keen On Players Wearing Nighties, Monster Cocks In Public

1:30PM Clem Bastow | As reported yesterday, Carlton’s Brendan Fevola was looking festive on Mad Monday when he hit the bars of Federation Square along with his teammates, donning a floral nightie, pink cloche hat and giant rubber dong that looked just precious with his eye colour. In a stunning development, the AFL (and the government, and the Australian Family Association, and…) has reacted with disappointment to the Blues’ star’s latest bout of public revelry (who can forget that old “pissing on the wall of the Police station” chestnut) and while they’ve not made it clear if they’ll extend their “Mad Monday” party pooping (or is that “poopering”?) to the entire league, Victorian Premier John “No Fun” Brumby is hopping mad. “You expect footballers to have a bit of fun and let off a bit of steam at the end of the year but you don’t expect them to parade around Federation Square in public the way these footballers were. Yes, yes, very good – now do you want to see VIDEO FOOTAGE of Fevola’s comedy knob? Of course you do. More »

Play On, Playa: Barry Hall Adds A THIRD Girl To His Harem

10:50AM Clem Bastow | Anyone who has read the Herald Sun and its interstate stablemates over the past three months or so will likely have been amused by Sydney Swans player Barry Hall’s turbulent love life, which until now involved two separate girls, and was aired as a possible reason for his predilection for punching players out on the field. However not content with two squeezes, Bazza’s seemingly decided to make it an uneven three and go for a lady hat trick. Hall was spotted enjoying a night off with a mystery blonde at a Sydney cinema on Monday night. More »

Sam Newman-gate: More Calls For Sacking, No More Coming On

9:50AM Clem Bastow | After “accidentally” saying a female MP was “worthy of coming on” on last week’s edition of The Footy Show, the calls for Sam Newman to take a permanent holiday from the AFL chat show are growing louder. I think we can safely say, however, that the surprise in this instance is not that such words could accidentally tumble out of Newman’s mouth, but more that he is still on-air in the first place! Federal Minister for the Status of Women Tanya Plibersek said Newman’s comments were offensive to women. “No matter what women achieve, some people apparently still see them as sex objects,” she said. “The public response to Sam Newman’s latest outburst shows that most people appreciate how stupid and shallow his comments are.” And Victorian Workforce Participation Minister Jacinta Allan called on the network to take Newman off air. She said: “Sam operates outside the boundary of good taste. Like most people I find the comments highly inappropriate.” Public Transport Minister and Western Bulldogs’ No.1 woman ticketholder Lynne Kosky said she had stopped watching The Footy Show because of Newman’s behaviour. Ms Wriedt was a personal friend, she said. “Paula’s a fantastic person and she just doesn’t deserve it,” she said. Melbourne Demons board member Karen Hayes said people would hold Newman accountable based on his track record. “It’s not funny any more,” she said. While I’m inclined to believe that Newman didn’t actually mean to say he wanted to give Wriedt a pearl necklace, there is such a thing as a Freudian slip and the fact that a) Newman said it and b) his co-panelists heard what they wanted to in what he said suggests that the climate at the Footy Show studios isn’t exactly reconstructed. More »

Sam Newman Surprised To Find Saying Woman Is ‘Worthy Of Coming On’ Could Be Misconstrued

2:40PM Clem Bastow | Oh Sam Newman, you incorrigible rogue, you! The beleaguered Footy Show star has stepped in it again, though this time he claims he had no idea he’d said something naff. And not only that, but he was “horrified” to think that anyone could’ve misinterpreted what he’d said about Tasmanian MP Paula Wriedt. [T]he controversial Newman asked: “We couldn’t get her on, could we?” The remark sparked a raucous reaction from the audience and panel, before Newman continued: “Worthy of coming on, her.” The comments immediately drew the ire of co-host James Brayshaw, who berated Newman telling him: “Sam you cannot say that.” [...] After Newman’s aside co-host James Brayshaw was clearly upset and took the former Geelong star player to task several times. Newman then became defensive and said it was a genuine slip of the tongue. Co-host Garry Lyon sided with Newman, but news reporter Craig Hutchison appeared unhappy with the comments, saying “that’s disgraceful”. Newman accused his co-hosts of misinterpreting his meaning. Well, at least this time the co-hosts called him out. Perhaps this is like that horror movie where the person gets a hand transplant, and they’re evil hands, and they kill people against the body’s will? Maybe Sammy got a sexist scalpel left inside him when he had surgery, and it’s making him say bad things. Is that right, Sam? More »

Sam Newman-gate: Advertiser Boycott Encouraged

9:25AM Clem Bastow | The fallout from Sam Newman’s hilarious mannequin stunt on the Footy Show continues to ripple through the industry, with word that other major advertisers could join ANZ in pulling their funds from the Show’s ad breaks. Women’s Forum Australia, a national lobby group, is – understandably – pressuring major advertisers to take a stand against the Footy Show’s dark ages sexual politics. The director of Women’s Forum Australia, Melinda Tankard Reist, said a wider boycott would have broad support. “This is definitely worth us doing,” she said. “The program has caused a great deal of hurt to a lot of women and if The Footy Show can’t respond in a proper manner, then maybe they will respond when they start losing money.” The group, led by a Canberra-based board of female academics, doctors and welfare experts, will consider the issue at a board meeting next week. Advertisers or sponsors on the show include Nissan, Mitre 10, Safeway, Mazda, Arnotts, Telstra and Toyota. Current advertisers McDonald’s, Foxtel and adidas ruled out a boycott. Apparently a show staffer has quit over the kerfuffle as well, though he a) requested anonymity and b) issued a “no comment” as to his exact reasons for leaving the gig. Basically whatever happens through all this, it would just be nice to have it end with Sam Newman eating shit his words and being made to make a formal apology – on the day The Footy Show is cancelled for being irrelevant and is replaced by Straughnie. More »