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Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Can ‘Horton’ Get A Woop Woop?

2:25AM Seth | You wake up cold and confused, naked except for the half-singed bonnet on your head, and surrounded by hundreds of empty Peeps boxes and decapitated chocolate bunnies. Damn it: You’ve surrendered to another Easter weekend bender. Enjoy the last pulses of glucose shooting through your veins as you peruse the box office numbers: More »
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Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Box Office: Horton Hears Talk Of A Sequel

2:30AM Seth | In honour of St. Patrick’s day, we invite you to revisit the Crichton Leprechaun, peruse the screensavers and wallpapers available for download at colinfarrell.org, and dive into that bowl of cornflakes before the green beer turns them soggy. And while you’re at it, have some box office numbers for good luck: More »
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Clan Of The Cavemodels

3:00AM Seth | As you recover from one of the more jarring daylight savings shifts in recent memory, try as hard as you can to avoid the stares of co-workers who can’t help but notice you sporting your stubbornly punctual morning priapism. Perhaps the box office numbers will ease the transition: More »
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Saturday, March 8, 2008

When CGI Shlock Ruled The Cineplex: ‘10,000 B.C.’ Opens To An Ice-Agey Reception

4:50AM Seth | Poised to overtake Semi-Pro as the #1 comedy in America this weekend, 10,000 B.C., Roland Emmerich’s hilariously bombastic homage to the dawn of CGI-man, officially opens today. Along the way, it has inspired film critics to some of their best movie-panning in recent memory, with the NY Times’s A.O. Scott having dubbed this tale of a “tribe of snuffleupagus hunters” a “sublimely dunderheaded excursion into human prehistory.” Here’s a sampling of some of the caveman-themed headlines that contributed to its 9% Tomato-Meter score: More »
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