People

After We’re Gone, Celebrity Wang Lives On In Our Hearts

By Foster Kamer on March 1, 2010 at 1:30 AM

Sparkly vampire Robert Pattinson’s big orgy debut angers his non-sparkly girlfriend! Lindsay Lohan is out on the town, partying again. A-Rod dumped his new girlfriend. Oprah has secrets. Presenting my final Gossip Roundup:

  • Lindsay Lohan sucks. [NYDN]

  • A-Rod sucks. [Page Six]

  • Tyra Banks sucks. [Page Six]

  • Charlie Sheen sucks. [TMZ]

  • The Black Eyed Peas suck. Unless they’re punching Perez Hilton in the face. [Page Six]

  • Britney Spears sucks. [Just Jared]

  • Oprah sucks. [TMZ]

  • Robert Pattinson and an orgy. [The Sun]

  • U2 sucks, but only recently, particularly over the last decade. [HuffPo]

  • Something about Lady Gaga’s penis. [Page Six]

  • Chris Rock is the man. [Just Jared]

  • Janice Dickenson sucks. [TMZ]

[Image not via The Smithsonian Archive. That turned out far stranger than I'd originally anticipated. Still, I enjoy it. Also, if I ever put "Photoshop Proficient" on my resume, at least you know I'm lying now.]

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