Letter From The Editor

Good morning, darling readers. How are tricks? All good, I hope. Listen, I just wanted to have a quick word with you regarding the next couple of days. Spare me a moment?

As I may have mentioned – quite a bit – over the last few weeks, tonight I am hopping a plane to London. Well, I am actually hopping a plane to Kuala Lumpur, waiting around for ten hours (I will not smoke! I WILL NOT SMOKE!), then jumping on another flight to London where I will arrive at the entirely inconvenient time of midnight and hope to god someone loves me enough to come and pick me up.

Point being, I will not be writing tomorrow or Friday because I will be in the midst of a hellishly long trip to Ol’ Blighty. I know what you’re wondering – what will become of you? Who will delight and entertain you with quips about Home & Away stars? Share stupid videos with you? Ramble on about Stevie Nicks until your ears begin to bleed?

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO DEFAMER AUSTRALIA…. MS CLEMENTINE BASTOW!

The wildly popular Ms Bastow has very kindly agreed to fill in for me while I am “in transit” and I couldn’t be happier to leave my interweb baby in her care. I trust things won’t get too Hand That Rocks The Cradle, but if she offers to breastfeed you, say no. That’s our special thing.

I’ll be back on Monday though, writing with a Mockney accent and dribbling on about Eastenders, so that’s something to look forward to, innit? ORRIGHT, GUV?

x

PS: Cheap/free things to do in London – recommendations, please? It’s been a while since I was there.