Get Out The Croquet Set, Heathers Is Headed To TV
Fox announced today that they’re bringing the dead mean girls back from the grave for a small screen version of every hipster’s favourite 1988 black comedy. So, what’s their damage?
The show will be written by Mark Rizzo (of Men in Trees fame) with help from Jenny Bicks (of Sex and the City), with the cooperation of Lakeshore entertainment, which owns the rights to the movie. Says Lakeshore honcho Gary Lucchesi: “We had the title, and talked about doing a film remake at times, but doing it for TV seemed like a fresh and original idea,” Oh yeah, that idea is about as original as a Winona Ryder shoplifting joke.
All the characters from the original will be back, but no word on how it’s going to work as a serialised comedy. Can you really keep faking suicides for seasons? Rizzo hasn’t discussed any updates, like changing the name to Madisons. Guess we’re just going to have to wait and see. And, what does this mean for Heathers: The Musical? We’d much rather see that.
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Comments (AU Comments | US Comments)
@valet_of_the_dolls: yeah, damned if generation zzz gets to co-opt that mutha. that shit is OURS.
levari
@Proofer3: well, soon we'll see how much you'd like that limp wrist with a pulse.
levari
Yeah, don't worry about "faking suicides for seasons." With those two as showrunners it won't make ONE season. Only in Hollywood could someone say that a remake is fresh and original idea with a straight face.
HandsomeBwonderful
I love the movie Heathers like a son that died in a suicide pact and turned out to be gay. I LOVE MY DEAD GAY SON!
MosseyCade
The fucking fuck?! Nothing is sacred. Nothing at all. I mean is Gossip Girl really so illustrious that short of copying that show and calling it Rumor Chick (which is not nearly as lame as this), "originality be damned" nonsense it's better to trot out every teen based movie/show from twenty years ago to try and capture some Gossip Girl dregs of win? Total and complete Hollywood ass-faces!
I have an idea. Ooo, it's controversial...why not hire some decent writers (which apparently went to ground after Friends and Seinfeld ended) and come up with new shit?
How fucking lazy can you be? More to the point, if you want to be jerks, hire me. I'd like several million for researching imdb.com all day. Lookee here, I can sell you Splash for CBS, Weekend at Bernie's for ABC, and Soul Man for NBC. Black face is kinda happening now, right? Fucks.
And also I can't believe no one at all said this yet:CORRRRRNNNNNUTTTTS!!!
Spirit Fingers
@Brian Moylan: Exactly what I was thinking. Gossip Girl? Good. Mean Girls? Good. GG/MG mashup? Goooooood.
DahlELama
you guys, you guys, there are a myriad of reasons to love this remake.
cocodevaux
@dummyfakeroller: As much as I want to hate this, you make it sound awesome!
Brian Moylan
@valet_of_the_dolls: I need to bring that phrase back into my repertoire.
No! Blasphemy! This film worked perfectly as a quintiseential cult classic dark comedy whatever-you-want-to-call it, and should not be skewed under the photoshopped eye of the current era. I said no!
Antonella
@veronykah: I read your comment as saying "As I was talking to my dog..." and I was just imagining your dog shaking its head over the idea.
@thegreatfratsby: It was more a comment on a generation that knows nothing about Heathers. I had a younger friend who loved Jawbreaker and had never heard of Heathers. It brought out the sad in me.
But knowing that Mean Girls is based on DC brings out the happy in me.
@Lymed: Of course we will, you youngster.
Noooo! Why remake this? Doesn't the Y Gen already have their "Mean Girls"? Back off, man.
Fuck me gently with a chainsaw.
I have a horrible feeling it will turn into a weird Gossip Girl/Mean Girls television mashup.
@PamBeesley:
Q.E.D.
@Mikey-B: Mr. Lucchesi, you keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
@veronykah: But this version will be different! Gays will be accepted! Girls will be size 0! Foie gras instead of pâté!
skymotel
Yet again the remakers miss the point. It was the execution, not the basic idea, that made Heathers work. If they could get someone like Rob Thomas to make it, it might have a chance. They won't even try, though.
@Senator Sully: I'd promote this comment if I wasn't just a gawker commenter pee-on. you are so on the money with FOX.
HypocriticalOath
All Fox has left to offer is date rape and AIDS jokes.
Jesus fucking Mary and Joseph, can't these people just leave my few remaining spots of sentiment and nostalgia alone? Isn't it enough that they've taken away my personal favorite Senator this week? Will my agony ever end?
Screw this, I'm going back on my meds.
skippywasserman
As I was walking my dog here in LA yesterday past ads for Melrose Place and 90210, the thought popped into my head..."Why can't they come up with NEW tv shows anymore?"
And now this? HEATHERS?!
Sacrilege.
Anyone old enough to know the movie is probably not going to be watching a tv show based on it on Fox.
Why can't they just come up with NEW concepts, is it really that hard?
@Lymed: Hey now. Mean Girls may have gotten inspiration from Heathers, but it was also based on a book written about National Cathedral School in DC.
Yeah, that's right. DC Private Schools: we got the Obamas, and Mean Girls!
thegreatfratsby
TV execs and their shower-nozzle masturbation material...
Understater
Seriously? On network television? This is why I only watch Food Network and Comedy Central. Ok, and House.
@Smitros: Not the F.B.I., the C.I.A., or the P.T.A.
Ugh.
Even dumber than trying to make "fetch" happen...
City_Dater
The Vassar College Croquet Club is either gonna be overjoyed or pissed off. And you wouldn't like them when they're pissed off. In fact, you wouldn't like them when they're overjoyed either.
RollsRoyceRevenge
@RheaPollstry: and she was that much hotter in Nowhere
And now all these kids will be talking about how this new show is a rip off of Mean Girls. Ugh.
How VERY (stupid).
HypocriticalOath
Fox is just producing this because they've run out of good shows to cancel.
"We had the title, and talked about doing a film remake at times, but doing it for TV seemed like a fresh and original idea."
I think Mr. Lucchesi has been misinformed as to the meaning of 'original'.
@mfnher: I'm sure that'll be edited in some markets to "I love my gay son dead."
TubOfTaft
Nobody can stop J.D.
@PamBeesley: But is, "I love my dead, gay son" too risque?
mfnher
Wow, Shannon Dougherty used to be attractive.
Heathers, let me count the number of times thee has been copied already:
(Well it's really too much effort, but there are a lot.)
I'd see the musical for Kristen Bell, but I think that's where I draw the line.
DahlELama
Is nothing sacred? You know, when something's timeless it doesn't mean "let's keep repackaging it as a remake", it means "you can leave it alone".
hilikusopus
If you want to fuck with the eagles you have to learn how to fly.
This is a travesty. If they can't say "fuck me gently with a chainsaw" or "they all want me as a friend or a fuck" why bother?