Lindsay Lohan Will Stop At Nothing To Expand Her Spray-Tan Empire

@ChillbearLatrigue: And so easy to find in the dark...

@kimberlydebarge: No idea what the fascination is with her...yuck

Bedheadjc

@CaptainFantastic: Seriously. She was like a dull plastic mannequin between two radiantly gorgeous real women.

@ChillbearLatrigue: It would be nice if pale="fair" yet again rather than "pasty."

I'm from Dallas (I know) and when people in cities in the Northeast I meet hear that, I invariably get a comment like "...but your're so pale"--like everyone in Texas is a farmer or something. Not a fan of my homestate in many ways, but we do have indoors and sunscreen.

@easternsike: But Neely O'Hara would be such wonderfully meta casting. (Plus, I can actually picture her keening away in alley somewhere, shouting her own name to the heavens...)

@ChillbearLatrigue: Mae West and my grandmother told me to never, ever go in the sun.

Here's a nice piropo I received from a cute Puerto Rican boy not long ago: "Baby, you so white and beautiful, you make all the clouds jealous."

@CaptainFantastic: exactly. give me Cate over Angelina lite any day of the week!

@ChillbearLatrigue: ..He was my first childhood crush. Scout's honor! I somehow got a hold of an illustrated bio and swooned for about six months around the age of 10. One of the hottest enlightened despots of all times, before the bloat and the crazypants megalomania set in.

snugbug

@Heywoodjablome: I have yet to find a spray tan or lotion that doesn't produce orange streaks on my whiter-than-white legs.

Even that Jergens SUPPOSEDLY gradual tan lotion didn't work.

The One

@The One: the neutragina spray tan shit is pretty good...i discovered it at Target on my jaunt to Texas, and it doesn't make me look Cheeto-ey.

Heywoodjablome

@Ladies and Gentlemen-Mr. Burt Bacharach: I can admire that you saw the camp in that piece of shit movie. I just found it horrible. Sad really, cuz I think Lilo actually as talent.

Heywoodjablome

@DahlELama: Heather sometimes shows sense, too. Lindsay is much more prudish with hers.

deardearfriend

@cmd: You're in my company then. You probably understand why I'm pushing this agenda.

@snugbug: Bad-ass.

@HeScoresHeShoots: Fear not. If you are naturally dark of skin, you will be considered exotic and rare. This is just a trend that will save us pasty people from contracting skin cancer in a desperate attempt to fit in.

I always see that Lohan spray tan shit in Sephora, and each time, I wonder why someone would purposely want that Doritos-like orange skin she's known for sporting.

The One

Meh. Megan Fox is trying too hard.

And what the ferg do I hear of her possibly being the lead in a Supergirl movie remake?! Please someone out that as rumor. That's like half a click away from Wonder Woman and that would indeed be too much.

Spirit Fingers

"Britney Spears was living it up in Paris, touring the Eiffel Tower with her kids.."

Even more sinfully, she then toured a McDonald's joint nearby.

snugbug

I read on Lilo's twitter than she was reading a Valley of the Dolls script. I nominate Lindsay to be Jennifer North! Fake lesbian with big tits and no talent.

@HeScoresHeShoots: Consult Michael Jackson's physician. He's reputable.

@ChillbearLatrigue: I guess I'll be in fashion now. Well, except my arms and neck. Could I get spray on something for them? Maybe "white-out"?

HeScoresHeShoots

@ChillbearLatrigue: Sirs and gents, PLEASE also start wearing those French Rev-style ascot/cravats/scarves again underneath your jackets.. Very handsome on a man!

This fox here demonstrates the look:

[www.uh.edu]

I also approve of his haircut.

snugbug

@CaptainFantastic: Right? I've seen people bronze their faces and not take care to make the rest of their skin catch up to the tan (yours truly is definitely guilty of this sin) but the opposite actually looks even more bizarre.

DahlELama

@bboston88: You are correct, sir. They are living in sin. And should continue to do so, as Halle Berry seems to have finally found a relationship style that works for her. Marriage? Not so much.

DahlELama

@Artie Fufkin: Lindsay showed boob in New York Magazine, and crotch everywhere, so I'm pretty sure she would've been up to the task.

DahlELama

Megan, you looked great in that dress, but your foundation was the wrong color and you sat next to Cate Blanchett, who threw on some old thing, pulled her hair back, and upstaged you.

Baby Berry is ridiculously cute. I'm embarassed to admit that I think they are not married though...

bboston88

Megan Fox wears a cocktail dress in the daytime? Smells of desperate for attention.

Rumpelstilskin

Lindsay Lohan is such a lost cause at this point, it is almost unbelievable. Though I will say, I enjoyed "I Know Who Killed Me" for the camp value and wouldn't be totally upset if she continued to do such Razzie winning films.

@ChillbearLatrigue: As a frightened-by-the-sun redhead, this would be a dream come true.

cmd

Pale is the new tan. We are headed back to the beauty standards of the Age of Enlightenment. So ladies, be prepared to polish up your white round shoulders and long graceful necks. Gentlemen, let's start looking for a way to make knee socks work for us.

Are those photos of a drag Megan Fox impersonator? They should have focused on how chic Cate Blanchett looked instead.

And Mischa Barton looks sickly either way. When she's thin it looks like coke face and when she's bloated it looks like weed binging. Ick. She needs to formulate a plan for eating human food on a regular basis.

Heather Graham was really so much better than Lohan would have been. Because she showed her boob.

Mischa looked almost normal in those photos where she had puppies on top of her head, from that same event. I don't know what Goldilocks writer at the Mail does their gossip, but not too thin, not too fat, but just right will never, ever happen in the world of celebrity. That writer may as well shed a tear now.

ampersandparade

Bridget Bardot must have had the same problem with her teeth.