Jennifer’s Body: Another Diablo Cody Horror Movie

@T-RO: I don't think I'd like her in real life, nor did I like her forced dialogue (the tone was the same for each character, except for Cera's). Anyway, she, to me, is a Burner/Suicide Girl/Bettie Page mash up ... yawn ...

@eleusiswalks: Actually, that makes it much clearer. Thanks.

@DannyNoonan: Diablo Cody is not part of the "alt" culture when she dresses and speaks exactly like my group of friends in Lawrence, KS circa 1992.

I thought Juno was a genuinely terrible movie, with silly, unfunny dialogue, 2 dimensional characters and a ridiculously unbelievable plot.

The characters were cardboard cut-out sterotypes, nearly every moment of the plot was contrived and unbelievable. The whole theater groaned during the "Honest to blog" line. No jealousy here--not an aspiring screenwriter by any stretch.

@SpyMagician: I'm talking about everything he's ever done. I could spend days talking about exactly how BtVS, even, is incredibly misogynist. He's a talented writer -- despite his tendency to get caught up in his own fetishes -- but he's really not a feminist by any stretch. I think he really believes he is, though, and I can't blame him for trying... but it's almost invariably a mess.

Dollhouse, actually, I found to be among his more gender-egalitarian outings. The "dolls" include males and -- while the focus of the series itself is on a female one -- it never seems like 'woman victim' is the crux of the show, at least not to me.

It certainly is just yet another one of his explorations of -rape-, though, which he clearly feels is an instrumental part of a woman's development as a person.

eleusiswalks

@Ken Green:
word!

JudyPaceFace

@[famousplastic.com]

@BBooms: Awww, poor thing. I hope the disequilibrium clears up!

@DahlELama: I didn't read the words too good. It's Monday.

@eleusiswalks: You're talking about Dollhouse right? The premise and title alone bellies his ability to spin his intentions in any way.

they should recut the trailer using the pixies "i bleed" as a soundtrack.

criticism is envy with wings.

@SpyMagician: I would, because it'd be yet another expression of his deep-seated sexualized misogyny. I loved Buffy and (especially) Angel but my god if that man claims to be a feminist one more goddamn time I will just snap.

eleusiswalks

@BBooms: are you serious?

@NoodlePress: I know! I noticed that too. Color Guard represent!

You know, pouring through all these 70s and 80s montages of MJ and Farrah the last week I'm filled with a sad longing for when beautiful women didn't feel the need or push from agents to enhance their looks with tank tops, spray tans, DDs and fish lips. Siggghhh. I saw an interview with Megan and her fat lips and I couldn't believe it. What is she? Like 25? WTF? Are we going backwards?

franimaljones

@bess marvin, girl detective: Or, maybe, she's just really fucking hot. How do you know she's had her nose and boobs done? And the lips thing? 23 year olds don't need to get their lips done.

I have not seen Transformers so i'll bite.

@badasscat: Hey, they said "fuck" alright?

ColbertNation

@mimigoliath: and he's wearing EYELINERRRRRR.

ampersandparade

@Colonel Mustard: Also, did I see Amy Sedaris's name flash by? She tends to pick the worst possible movies to grace with her presence, but I adore her.

@Lulupasternak: I'm not over it. Yeah, I'm jaded. It's the zeitgeist now where it would be very hard to make a movie like this about abortion. It's not the movie per se. It's the creeping anti-choiceism that has swallowed this country whole. And a grudging kudos to those church ladies (and men). They have done a swell job of demonizing this, a most personal choice. And now, along comes dear Juno and presto: they are cool, hip and ironic.

Banjo-Sea Kitten

@SpyMagician: Well Joss has talent. That's the different. I mean I hate him as a person, but the guy knows how to write.

@Colonel Mustard: I'll take a moronic burger phone over a 17 year old girl smoking tobacco out of an old man pipe. But I adore Amanda, too!

@T-RO: I saw Juno at a screening far before Ms. Cody had turned herself into a red carpeteer. And thought it was a piece of crap. Then, once everyone on the planet decided it was the Greatest Thing Ever and she started showing up everywhere with her "Fempire" (her. word; i shit you not) the coterie of similarly too-cool-for-school chick writer friends she hangs out with, I decided she was a piece of crap too. The fact is, SHE has put herself out there as a commodity (her NAME for starters) and therefor is up for as much ridicule as her movie. Certainly the H'wood press is partly to blame--she seems like a good story--but I dare say some of those 40-something pros you mock have been working longer and harder and written better scripts and haven't gotten a sliver of the attention or accolades (or money). The point about it being hard to get a movie made? EXACTLY; except for freaking Diablo Cody. People are irritated by her precisely because it HASN'T been hard for her and she frankly seems much less a talented writer than a canny self-promoter. Which, to my mind, makes her the absolute opposite of authentic. Hunh. Just like her writing.

Then again, had I thought to change my name to Beelzebub Earp, maybe I would be less bitter.

@aedude01: But a good script doesn't mean good movie, as the original Buffy film shows us. Which would you have rather have had--one movie or all those seasons on TV?

Lulupasternak

OMG, Adam Brody is so cute.

Sorry, that was appropos of nothing.

@Banjo-Sea Kitten: But if the character had had an abortion, the movie would have been 15 minutes long. The character isn't you, or your pals. It's fiction. Get over it.

Lulupasternak

@robotsattack: But how would she know?

Lulupasternak

The fact that Diablo Cody, Jason Reitman & Karen Kusama felt compelled to release a different cut of the trailer than the official one (which is getting released July 10th) does not bode well for the box office success of this movie. And from the looks of this version, I think they should hand out a complimentary keg to anyone watching it. They'll need it. It's just....boring.

HaldenSiren

@Ken Green: THANK YOU! I've been calling the damn thing 'Daria gets Knocked Up' since it came out. How people decided it was "fresh" is beyond me.

@T-RO: "Like Us?"....speak for yourself Linda Tripp.

nicepony

@DannyNoonan: One line to say it all "Honest to Blog!".

@CaptainFantastic: Disagree. Megan Fox is way hotter than Sasha "Eyebrows" Grey.

Agreed, this looks like a 12-year old Twilight fan saw Teeth, missed the point, and was hired to rewrite it.

Speaking of Teeth, here's a fun party trick: Put the movie on with a group and watch everyone laugh/squeal, etc. If anyone arrives late, just before they walk in rewind to the makeout scene at the lake, then tell them the move is called Young Love.

@BookishLookish: That was the scariest part of the trailer, agreed.

@atlasspanked: ahahaha you just brought up fight club apropos of nothing on the internet, good job bro.

"From the mind of Diablo Cody"

That's fucking grim.

@T-RO: "she comes out of 'alt' culture" omg r u carles? i <3 alt bros, such the best!!!!

@atlasspanked: I'm not on the Megan Fox hate bandwagon but, surely you know that her looks are anything but genetic. Plastic surgery took care of her nose and breasts while frequent Restalyne visits keep the lips plump.

I do agree with your third point though, so you got that going for you...which is nice.

@checkyaself:

Yeah, that droll detachment from the rest of the whole teenage experience was just a coincidence.

Ken Green

Nope, awful.

nicepony

Three observations:

1) Juno hate is always justified because the movie sucked. Gigantically.

2) Megan Fox ripping sounds like jealousy...which is understandable given the gross genetic inequality most of us are forced to live under.

3) There is no such thing as alt culture except in the mind of altsters. It's just generational marketing targeted toward ones' inflated sense of individualism - even if your name's Diablo and you once pole-danced.

'You're not your fuckin' khakis'.

So wake me up if Cody makes something better than Fight Club. Until then I'm surfing for MF web shots.

atlasspanked

@T-RO: I like a lot of people on a personal level who I think are terrible writers. You're arguing a moot point.

@Ken Green: The only thing Juno had in common with Daria is brown hair.

checkyaself

@T-RO: I know these are just opinions, but all terrible pop-references aside, JUNO was god-awful.

@T-RO: If you think that Diablo Cody is "alt" culture, you probably enjoy Urban Outfitters, trucker hats, skinny jeans, and Fall Out Boy for their unique and rebellious attitude. That or you are some lame flack who works in a studio or the production company that made Juno. Either way you suck.

Charolastra

@Ken Green: DARIA GOT PREGNANT? I must have missed that episode.

@valet_of_the_dolls: no, but i had her bad dread-like braid.

@Richard Lawson: Oh come on now, someone can't have a different opinion? My point is that I relate far more to someone like Diablo Cody than, I don't know some random 40-something dude who has been a pro screenwriter for 20 years and is all slick and cheesy. She comes out of "alt" culture, and as such, we probably like a lot of the same stuff culturally, and I thought it was so cool to see someone who resembles me and my friends, on that stage. And so I root for her success, no matter how much I thought Juno's dialogue was just too perfect and perky, and that the premise was as ridiculous as Knocked Up (pretty young girl with her future ahead of her, decides to have a baby for no discernible reason other than to serve as a plot device). Again, I have never written a screenplay, but I have all these friends trying to make it, and the Diablo Cody hate that comes from people who would probably like her in Real Life, just smacks of envy and jealousy (she sucks, I'm smarter and better, and doggone it people like me!). That's all I was trying to say. I'll shut up now.

@ThaLza: It does seem very "Ginger Snaps," but that's not necessarily a bad thing. At least steal from something interesting.

@power_stroke: I can hang with Jolie and her global activism. I like that she has adopted. What's unfortunate are her movies and the fact that in interviews she and Brad continue to say that they want more natural babies. Stop, already.

Banjo-Sea Kitten

@Jackiewsu: Only not as hot as that porn star that was recently in the real hollywood movie about hooking.

@GooberSaysHey: yeah but we ARE lesbians.

@DannyNoonan: I love when commenters go right to accusing anyone of not liking something/someone as being jealous. That's like the asshole guy at a party that thinks all the women who won't go home with him are lesbians.

@Colonel Mustard: and...Burger Phone Girls CHOOSE LIFE.

Banjo-Sea Kitten

@badasscat: yep, Badass. Well put.

T-RO, I actually like some of Cody's snappy writing and the performances in Juno were quite good, but the fact that they cuted up a teen pregnancy and then the teen spent all of 2 minutes "deciding" what she would do with the fertilized egg, just smacked of anti-choice nonsense to me.

Banjo-Sea Kitten

The trailer looks amusing. You don't see a lot of horror movies where an incredibly hot girl kills all the guys.

They found pieces of Megan's careeeeeeer

Ginger Snaps was way the fuck smarter than Jennifer's Body will be, guaranteed.

@Banjo-Sea Kitten: I concur. She's like Angelina Jolie, minus the embarrassing public attempts at social consciousness.

power_stroke

@DahlELama: I'm just hoping they don't kill me!

@T-RO: "Like us"?
You've got a lot of mileage out of being a former exotic dancer too?

@Richard Lawson: Stop trying to silence T-RO, your jealousy is showing.

@good_times: That she is. She looks like a porn star that they let work in real hollywood movies.

@T-RO: Oh shut up.

@DontMakeMe: It appears so, but I'm wary of getting too excited since I have learned the hard way that they are oh-so-fleeting...but I appreciate your excitement about it, and as such will do my best to propagate your fine contribution.

DahlELama

Touche! Seriously, few people will be able to tell the difference. I'm sure Joss himself is upset at this an the whole Twilight franchise.

@DahlELama: Yay! You've been reinstarted [my "contribution" to the Gawker lexicon]!

@Banjo-Sea Kitten:

"Transformers is not a movie about acting"- Megan Fox

She was annoying and then that quote sort of won me over.

robotsattack

@T-RO: "Juno" wasn't like us; it was a parody of us.

Awesome X

Diablo has seen "Ginger Snaps", no?

ThaLza

@T-RO: Wait a second, "like us"? Huh?
i don't see any of your manuscripts being made into movies... does anyone have any idea how hard it is to get a movie made?
I hate that stupid argument. By that logic I can't criticize anything unless I happen to be in that field.

Megan Fox is so dirty hot. I think I love her.

good_times

@Banjo-Sea Kitten: The sad thing is, you are absolutely correct — the burger phone says everything you need to know about Juno.

And then the movie goes on for another hour and a half.

@DahlELama: I might also still have a thing for Adam Brody, but I'm not admitted anything.

She'll eat everybody alive...oh, except Michael Bay.

Martiniman

@T-RO:

"does anyone have any idea how hard it is to get a movie made."

Shhhhh....I'm busy watching "Transformers 2"

Ken Green

@SpyMagician: No because as crazy as the premise might be, it'd at least have a good script.

aedude01

@T-RO: by your i mean richard, the envy-er.

@DannyNoonan: i was going to say the same thing. you should be happy that someone who is "like us" has made it. i don't see any of your manuscripts being made into movies. beyond whether or not you think it's cloying, does anyone have any idea how hard it is to get a movie made. it's such a crapshoot, let alone if it's any good. Juno was good. maybe not oscar winning worthy, but certainly very good.

That was highly disappointing for a red band trailer. What's the point of red banding it if you're not going to, you know, *use* that designation to its fullest?

It's kind of like asking for your film to get an X rating because it's got a shot of a dong in it.

@Richard Lawson: Not to mention a bunch of right-wing propaganda masquerading as liberal open-mindedness.

So if Joss Whedon wrote this would people be whining so much about it?

@DannyNoonan:

I liked Juno when it was an animated series on MTV called Daria.

Or when it was known as a standup comedian named Janeane Garafalo.

Ken Green

@Colonel Mustard: This movie looks Godawful, but Amanda Seyfriend has brought so much good into this world...if I subject myself to this, it will be on her merit alone. But the second Megan Fox speaks, I'm joining in your bonfire of the vanities.

DahlELama

@Richard Lawson: I look forward to your memoir, LolCait:Up From Commenter.

Awesome X

@Sleepyhead: "Jennifer's Body" was on "Live Through This," so yes, EastEndGuy is correct.

DahlELama

Gawker has saved me from seeing so many movies!

Demon girl is on Flags not a cheerleader, yes!

@DannyNoonan: Well good, because it totally is. Envy that Cody has become a millionaire Oscar winner for writing a lame derivative mixtape.

Looks like the campiest thing since "Showgirls." Where does the line form?

The Juno hate reads like envy. Just so you know...

Megan Fox = I'm there

GavinGauvinized

@Colonel Mustard: but, but...a burger phone says SO MUCH. It's all you need to know about that character, right there in the burger phone.

Banjo-Sea Kitten

Parts of the clip make my loins "oddly intrigued" as well.

@EastEndguy: No, a different Hole song called.... "Jennifer's Body".

@EastEndguy: I would assume so given Cody's penchant for pop cult references. I do love that song though. Actually, the whole album. I once daydreamed of playing "Violet" at my wedding just for the "go on take everything, take everything, I want you to" lyric.

HelloTitty

Thoughts:

1. Juno, the movie, must always die.

2. I'm starting to love Megan Fox. She's gorgeous, irreverant and she dissed on Michael Bay!

3. Let's hope the title reference is from the awesome Hole record, and not some backwater, strummy indie band of the kind that made up the irritating Juno soundtrack.

Banjo-Sea Kitten

I'll give it a chance, for Amanda Seyfried, but at the first sight of a burger phone I'm burning the place down. (Hollywood, I mean.)

Can we just get the Megan Fox sex tape already and be done with it..? She's already a vampire for sucking 10 bucks out of everyone's wallet to watch her in every bad movie she makes...

I'm in only if Megan Fox eats Juno.

Awesome X

Title references the Hole song off "Live Through This," no?

EastEndguy