Small Screen

Arthur Kade Will Not Let Vagina Stand In The Way Of Reality TV

In an exciting bit of rumour that almost makes us want to take the rest of the week off, a tipster tells us they heard on Philly radio that Zoolanderesque performance artist Arthur Kade’s getting a reality TV show. Uh.

According to our tipster:

I just heard on the radio here in Philly that Arthur Kade and another Philly born celebrity Richie Rosati just signed on to do a new Philly reality tv show called “I’m a Philebrity, Get Me Out Of Here”.

It’s supposed to also star Philly famous band G-Love and Special Sauce and another famed Philadelphian but not sure who?

We can find nothing in the news about this, and it could well be a total farce, since not even A to the K himself has blogged about it yet. He’s staying focused:

I ran into my new boy, Mickey Rourke (I am compared to him a lot because we both don’t really care what people think, and are considered sex symbols early in our careers, but I have to make sure I control myself because he is am animal), who I said hello to and chilled with for a hot minute, and I think he appreciated the attention that a rising superstar like Arthur Kade gave him, showing him that the new generation of rising actors does remember it’s past. People recognised me all through the club, watched every move I made, and I told the girl at one point, “I am very well known in NYC and LA”, and I wonder when I will end up in as Page 6 fodder…

The new Arthur Kade puts his fans and vision first, and he will never let vagina stand in his way again.

Mickey, you have something on your lip, bro. Anyhow, who knows if AK even has time for reality TV? His journey is one of altruism: “I want to eventually work with small African children, Afghan refugees, and even Central American refugees to show the world that Team Kade can give back (I will bring t-shirts, food, and other Brand memorabilia to help clothe and feed them).”

Comments (AU Comments | US Comments)

  • mslewis

    Does Mickey have on clown make up?

    mslewis

  • downlow

    @mwynn13: I thought it was a still from his audition tapes for the part of the Joker in "The Dark Knight". You know, before they gave the role to Heath.

  • johnny_carsick

    wow. so i'm guessing rourke is technically classified as a liquid now?

  • DorothyBarker

    As I read about Kade's desire to bring t-shirts and branding to the needy, t-shirtless and brandless third world I can't help but wonder: are we absolutely sure he isn't Sasha Baron Cohen's next creation?

  • thisisnotradio

    From the same Mickey Rourke post:

    "We also almost got into a fatal accident on Houston St. at Allen"...sigh...

    thisisnotradio

  • Veillantif

    @mwynn13: Really? I was going to say Nadya Suleman.

  • UrineToxicated

    This guy wouldn't know vagina if it sat on his face!

    UrineToxicated

  • heartbreakturnip

    "I'm kind of a big deal ... I have many leather-bound actor friends."

  • fragglewaggle

    @Conchie Birdie: I second your motion for a moratorium on Arthur Kade posts. He's a pig.

    fragglewaggle

  • mwynn13

    I'm a mean, mean person for saying this, but in the thumbnail, Mickey Roarke looks like the Elephant Man.

    mwynn13

  • MrInBetween

    I wish Arthur Kade and Julia Allison would bang each other into oblivion.

  • Conchie Birdie

    I propose an A.K. posting freeze. This is a recession, people, we can't be wasting our time on some douche pretending to be a douche just to be noticed for being a douche so he can get some douchey roles on some douchey tv.
    Although comparing yourself to Mickey Rourke and calling him your "new boy" is quite a smooth move, if I do say so myself.

  • DahlELama

    @irishflyesq: What do you want to bet he's also got the arm-thinning hand-on-hip gesture going on below the border of that pic? Not to mention the overall-slimming leg extension.

    DahlELama

  • CaptainFantastic

    @crotchety: Exactly. The role of Arthur Kade could have been a meaty one, but it's cast all wrong. This dude is more big man on campus of a suburban midwestern large high school, than Hollywood hunk. Also, he blew his load to quickly, which probably imitates life.

  • Caius

    @dado: I love you for this.

    Caius

  • irishflyesq

    He's got the teenage-girl-posing-for-Facebook-profile... head tilt down pat.

    irishflyesq

  • Nice Beaver

    . . . the new generation of rising actors does remember it's past.

    So, he's in on the joke?

  • Ellabella

    @depardoo: The "Brand" merch better suits the small...

    Ellabella

  • TVAddendum

    @TheHonJudgeSmails: DUTV- Drexel Channel 54 is proud to present "Another punnily titled knockoff show, shot with my disposable video cameras frm CVS"

    TVAddendum

  • Mama Penguino

    @TheHonJudgeSmails: a la Wayne's World.

  • City_Dater

    Being photographed with Mickey Rourke immediately after he's been enthusiastically kissed by a hooker is probably the closest to both fame and vagina this guy is ever going to get.

    City_Dater

  • crotchety

    Until today I thought this fellow was serious but I see now that this is all performance art. Good show, A. K., I finally get the joke. Kindly exit stage right now.

    crotchety

  • dado

    I'm not sure why that picture makes me think of Melanie Griffith and Antonio Banderas, but it does.

  • jobsworth

    Gawker, I remained quiet when you continued to fawn over JA but I will not be silent about this! Please, I beg of you, stop writing about this knob-end. You are giving him what he wants. I don't care if he's being ironic. He is fucking insufferable. Make him go away.

    jobsworth

  • depardoo

    Why is he discriminating against larger African children? Does he have a "little people" fetish?

    depardoo

  • resipsaloquacious

    Christ, did Rourke get a free herpes graft with his collagen injections?

  • Fry_Bread_Power

    But Arthur Kade is a vagina, a big one at that, so I'm glad to see that he has enough self-awareness not to stand in his own way.

  • TheHonJudgeSmails

    The lack of a network associated with this supposed "I'm a Philebrity, Get Me Out Of Here" reality show makes it pretty clear that this is in development for some Philadelphia local access channel.

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