Recession Kills SpongeBob
In your inexorable Thursday US media column: Nickelodeon magazine folds, newspapers face threats from within and without, Glenn Beck is allegedly a superstar, and the answer to a question you didn’t know you had:
Goodbye, Nickelodeon Magazine. Viacom is folding the kiddie title and laying off 30 people thanks to you, the thieving internet hordes. Just remember, even if your magazine has a circulation of a million, you will still be destroyed. Condolences to the fallen.
Apocalyptic newspaper news roundup! One Colorado paper is saving money by using all-volunteer photographers. How about a volunteer publisher instead, hey! Elsewhere: editors who worked for Sam Zell think he’s an idiot, a newspaper delivery guy stole $US200K from the New York Times, and the Boston Globe newsroom is threatened with a 23% pay cut if they don’t accept the company’s offer to cut their pay, in a different way.
Forbes somehow calculates that Glenn Beck is the most “ultrafamous” celebrity in all of the media. All of it. Which might make you mad until you remember that Forbes writers are now expected to make up 8 listicles per day, each.
Have you often asked yourself: “Why does the New York Times call its readers ‘Users,’ rather than ‘Readers?!?’” Well, that question has now been answered for you. It’s because all New York Times readers are on heroin.
- Next Post: The Chaser Anger The Public With Their “Chaser Style Prank” »
- « Previous Post: Time Puts Twitter On Cover, At Vanguard Of American Economy
Comments (AU Comments | US Comments)
@No Day Like Friday: I use to read it all the time until the cashier at the store told me that I was too old to be reading it. Then I started to read YM and Seventeen.
@Mama Penguino:
+ Watch video
uncivily obedient
@magnets: It was the only comic book I didn't mind reading aloud!
I used to read Nickelodeon back in the day. Anyone remember those awesome commercials.
I remember a lawnmower, some green goo, and various forms of deception to acquire a subscription.
@Mama Penguino: Nick mag was the shit, man. Spy for the discerning second-grader, left Disney Adventures in the dust
magnets
I know of one five year old who is going to be crushed at this news.
Thanks God for Glen Beck being ultrafamous because I got a break from him this morning during the drive to work. He had a sit in host with better voice since he is doing some "stage show" tonight that was sold out.
uncivily obedient
Glenn Beck and Nancy Grace could be the most ultrafamous couple since Brad and Angelina.
SultanaEleusis
Just as paranoid and twice as delusional as Bill O'Reilly, Glenn Beck is a legend in his own mind.
@pumpkinsoup: They'll live, just throw a few Star Magazines at him and if he's good, some Salem Lights. Oops, that was my childhood sorry...
@No Day Like Friday: Nickelodeon Magazine, Please?!?! Good times, good times.
alpinerover
YES! Glenn Beck IS a SUPERSTAR! A Warhol Superstar, the bestest, most drug-fiendy kind there is!
@Mama Penguino: I just let my son's subscription lapse a few months ago, not because he didn't like looking at the magazine, but our household budget had to be tightened.
Fucking recession. Now I feel guilty:(
pumpkinsoup