New York Rich Kids Show To Make The Case For Being Old And Poor

Suddenly, the annoyingly privileged, stuck-up kids I grew up with in the Detroit suburbs, who spent their summers touring Europe & acted like they were a "failure" if the best school they got into was Cornell, seem surprisingly authentic. At least they weren't trying to pretend they watched Ingrid Bergman movies.

what year? There were at least 4-5 expelled my freshman year.

RomeoGanjiro

@Fry_Bread_Power: To hide that "Dead behind the eyes" look that is sooo last season.

@mslewis: that is the truth.

the_k_record

I can't get angry at these fools since I agree with Richard . . . no REAL parent from the Upper East(West) Side would allow their child to appear on a stupid reality show on Bravo, especially if they are told to talk about money, clothes and other shit that doesn't matter these days. This sort of thing is just not done amongst the true elite of NY. Like all of the "Housewives" on all of those shows, these people are NOT the cream of the crop!!!

mslewis

They should have just cast this around the daughters of The Real Housewives of NYC. I have a feeling Avery is the HBIC.

Mostly I want to see Ramona at a school dance, doing the Tutu Fufu again.

Yitzhak

@easternsike: That's pretty much what I did do. (Of course, he'd heard of the movie; "Forest Whitaker won the Oscar for that, didn't he?" Sigh.)

I'd be more impressed if he claimed to be hot for Isabella Rossellini.

@RomeoGanjiro:

I was expelled from that school!

PictureItSicily

@Fry_Bread_Power: Blindness?

Mymoustache

@Mama Penguino: I was thinking more about the Gossip Girl demographic.

Mymoustache

@OrneryBabe: is that better or worse than a "woe is me" guttertramp?

Having gone to Regis (as one of the few low-income kids still allowed in there) I have tried for years to explain to my non prep school friends just how heinous a breed of humans entitled NYC prep school kids really are. I have just one thing to say to Bravo: THANK YOU. I. Cannot. Fuckin. Wait.

RomeoGanjiro

@DahlELama: You were at 2nd and the Bowery, right? You walk two blocks to Lafayette and Houston streets, and you get on the subway at the Broadway-Lafayette station.

If the B is running, you take it straight to 86th and Central Park West and walk a couple of blocks to Amsterdam. One train.

If it's not running, you take the D to 59th Street and change for a local to 86th and CPW. Or, you head upstairs at 59th and switch for a 1 to 86th and Broadway. Only one transfer.

I am proud of the fact that I graduated from Collegiate.

I just had to say it this last time thanks to the very real possibility that one of these preening touchwipes robs me forever of the sentiment.

EddieTheDane

mmmmm open season. i love it!

somethingsfishy

@Kid Twist: Please, enlighten me--what one magical train goes from the UWS to the East Village, at any point during the day?

DahlELama

@DahlELama: Please. You had to take two trains. One, if you traveled at the right time of day.

@heywhat: And perhaps Bravo will throw in a coke whore or three for good measure!

OrneryBabe

What? No tits?

snapfinger

@eXXX: yeah, i grew up on the UWS and going downtown did seem like a huge pain in the ass. of course, retrospectively, i was kind of lame.

smartastic

@Fry_Bread_Power: Recent cataract surgery?

@Mymoustache: I don't think the 12 yr olds in the Midwest think about these people at all. Not to sound all sour grapesy, but kids in the Midwest don't necessarily look to the coasts for cool.

it's a good think the ICL exists to uplift other cultures. and... that was where my patience snapped.

smartastic

I stopped after "the recession's my bitch." I'm struggling to pay my student loans and these little asshats get to ride on mommy and daddy's money.

Andalucía

@eXXX: Going lower East to upper West is a pain in the ass, as is lower West to upper East. But going from the UWS to basically little west 12th street, which is what this kid is essentially describing, is not a pain in the ass unless you're a complete prick. Is my feeling. And I live in Brooklyn.

being on a bravo television show about how much money and power you have is like walking down a crowded street with a "kick me" sign on your back.

i'll wear my most pointy boots. can't wait!

the_k_record

@El Matardillo: I watch Bravo, and I own a handgun.

Portmanteautally

@valet_of_the_dolls: do you realize that the 30 year old was born when idi amin's regime went down? If I were you I would have just told them to watch last king of scotland and call it a day.

@DahlELama: Yeah I guess I could see it in the case of dating someone who lives far. I dated a guy in Brooklyn while living in Queens and that sure was annoying. Am I just flying my bridge and tunnel flag by scoffing at the idea that getting from point A to point B anywhere (subway accessible) in Manhattan is a royal pain in the butt?

@ShreyashiBarbatus: Bet its Dwight.

nicepony

@Mymoustache: Fortunately, Midwesterners are now too poor to afford cable TV.

AuntPeniston

@Dickdogfood: I'm not sure whether that makes me feel better or worse...

Dear Lawson,

Please make your re-caps of NYC Prep less delectable and luscious than the ones of the Real Housewives. I have to draw the line somewhere, or my boyfriend will probably crawl onto the roof and snip our cable line.

With most sincere thanks: Pickles.

No Buppies?

@sirjohnoldcastle: None of the people who actually matter watch Bravo, so no.

@ArmCandy: Ben McKenzie's fake OC name was Ryan Atwood DUH. And none of this explains SouthLAnd...

lempha

@eXXX: When I was a senior in college, I lived on 2nd and Bowery and my boyfriend lived on 87th and Amsterdam, and going back and forth between the two actually was a royal pain in the ass. When I was that age and going to high school on the UES, I don't think I ever went below 72nd. Ever.

It's times like this--when things like that come out of my mouth--that I'm kind of glad I'm on NY-hiatus in Philly right now.

DahlELama

Is his facial hair penciled on?

@Conch: In the past few years they've really tapped into something strange and ancient and dangerous and wonderful.

@Dickdogfood: sigh*

I may say this stuff is total crap but, in all honesty, I'm takin what Bravo's puttin out.

Oh God. At least they spared us from seeing their nouveau riche mothers who think that owning last season's Louis means something. By episode three the internet will be filled with information about how their parents all have third mortgages taken out on their houses, are being sued by former investors who they ripped off and about to go to jail.

heywhat

@Fry_Bread_Power: To hide the fact that their eyes are bloodshot from partying.

Setting the TIVO now.

@sirjohnoldcastle: I think you're onto something.

@cdmunch: and...SNAP!

I'm suddenly so proud of my 17 year old nephew whose ambitions include attending community college and obtaining a '96 Toyota Camry.

AuntPeniston

Oh Richard, I am so sorry you are going to have to watch this crap in order to give us our delicious, delicious recaps. Actually, who am I kidding. I will also be watching this crap.

@Fry_Bread_Power: No one ever says "florist." I don't understand children.

Going downtown (FROM THE UWS!!) is a royal pain in the ass?

@Richard Lawson: Seriously. He had a girlfriend? "PC" must stand for "patient cock."

@Dickdogfood: (It turned out the movie she was thinking of was Friday the 13th, you see.)

That whole "what do you want to be when you grow up" with PC reminded me of the same answer you'd get from an 8-year-old: I want to be an actor...and an architect...and an astronaut...and president...and a doctor...

@Fabrice Sensation: Correct. On both the jacket criticism and the use of the word 'queen.'

@valet_of_the_dolls: Last year I had to explain who Karl Marx was to a thirty-something co-worker.

The same person, a different time: "I've never understood why so many buildings don't have a 13th floor. You have to figure most of them were built before the movie, right?"

Does anyone know what school they attend? $10 it's Dalton.

ShreyashiBarbatus

The Dalton Gang.

@Fry_Bread_Power: It is very bright, but a kind of white light from the photographers and video peeps, not so bright that you need sunglasses. It is to emulate Ms. Wintour.

Is Bravo quietly stoking a class war in this country? That would redeem them totally.

That queen doesn't even know how to properly button a jacket. ALWAYS SOMETIMES NEVER.

Genuine question: Why do people wear sunglasses at fashion shows? Is the runway really bright? Are they trying to look cool?

I stopped caring about NYC prepsters when Robert Chambers got a pass. I think some of these kids would be surprised that outside of 12 year olds in the Midwest, most people don't think about them at all.

Mymoustache

@cdmunch: now that's what i call a motherfucking takedown!

johnny_carsick

Christ on a crutch, that AC/DC t-shirt and fashion scarf ensemble just gave me a stomach pain reminiscent of early labor.

Beginning to think that Bravo is the voice of reason here in a world of trash. Love the fact that they are exposing to the world the narrow-minded, selfish, (frequently creepy), greedy, self-absorbed, clue-less, strangely motivated, social climbing, phony, nouveau riche, shallow, needy, whiney, co-dependant, brain-less, cosmetically altered, rude, mannerless, uneducated, idle personalities that float amongst us masquerading as leaders of business, government and community. Maybe it's the ultimate wake up call and Bravo will be cited as the catalyst to a more concerned, evolved, connected society. Who knew that the RH shows would be so educational???

MelitaPolyhymnia

Remember, the O.C. led to Laguna Beach led to The Hills.
This kid : Dan Humphrey :: Brody Jenner : Benjamin McKenzie

We lose.

ArmCandy

@nicepony: mazel for that dead on definition.

@Dickdogfood: I'm just impressed that he knows who she is. I had to explain Idi Amin to a thirty year old the other day, which was depressing.

Sorry you little whitey bits of upper middle class arriviste trash, your idea of the Hamptons is called the Jersey Shore, you wouldn't recognize fashion if you got a Marc Jacobs sweater enema, you don't have the money to get into Brown or Princeton and you won't get $100k+ jobs on Wall Street. Hell, I doubt you'll even get some old dude to fondle you on a casting couch, your acting skills are so pathetic and your women are crossed-eyed and ugly.

cdmunch

Ugh, these kids stink of Dwight.

Wait, what's wrong with crushing on Ingrid Bergman? OK, it's a little affected perhaps and maybe not as awesome as crushing on Dick Powell or Maria Falconetti, but c'mon, the kid's...what? Maybe twelve?

Sadness if you also tear up when Whitney Houston sings "I believe the children are our future." Joy if you're thinking what I'm thinking--liveblogging the heck out of these kids!!!

PC is who BRAVO fameball Andy Cohen always dreamed of being.

nicepony

@Richard Lawson: This kid is some hybrid of Adam Lambert and every male character on Gossip Girl, amIright?

Terrafractal

@flossy: Heh. I go to college with a girl from there. She is EXACTLY these people.

Terrafractal

I'm excited for your recaps. But moreso, I'm excited to see the closeup shots of PC getting ready for school.

@flossy:
absolutely!!

Dumb White Idiots Getting High Together... Dwight.

Not one of my friends parents growing up would have ever let their kids on this show.this shit is bush league. Having grown up on the upper east side, I am truly embaressed by the shear douchebaggery!

@Miss Smith Drank Your Vodka: When my cousin was little she used to tell people she would either be a doctor or work at McDonalds.

Dudezebel

@the_lerpa: Is that the first line of Less Than Zero remixed to fit these jokers? If so, nicely played.

class warfare anyone?

Steve Hess

"There's a different vibe that goes on in New York. Much different from L.A...." Really? Because the vibe I'm getting from you PC is the exact same vibe I got from L.A.'s Josh "I didn't steal that painting" Flagg of Bravo's "Million Dollar Listing" - the vibe of a privileged douchebag. Which really begs the question, is Bravo trying to create stock characters that they can use in all their shows? (As if Bravo is a modern day Commedia dell' Arte.) Is Danielle from The Real Housewives of New Jersey, basically the low rent version of Luanne from The Real Housewives of New York? They are, afterall, both "former models with the Ford Agency" with spurious pasts prior to marrying for money. While Isaac Mizrahi could never be Tim Gunn, it didn't stop Bravo from trying to make him into the same character.

VeasnaDione

People are afraid to merge on the FDR.

the_lerpa

@Mymoustache: Maybe. Still, we're so frigging far from NYC or LA that the kids here usually look to Chicago as definitively cool. Even more, Kansas City.

@Andalucía: Ugh I know! Same feeling here. I'm either going to have to work my ass off or take out a million loans or I'm not going to be able to continue to afford my college. But these kids are pissed because they can't afford the latest clothes or techno-gadgets or trips overseas... *gags*

@Andalucía: That's the same place I stopped! The recession is my abusive pimp and I had to pawn my heart of gold to pay for dentures.

"It's almost like you feel like you're an adult but you're only 16."

Welcome to Adolescence, oh Confucius.

@BadUncle: My BF's niece, bless her heart, said "cotton candy girl." Hey, at least she had realistic dreams.

I think it's funny that dude mentions STK as an example of one of the "great restaurants" downtown. And Spice Market. Jesus.

ligmasagbatch

@Kid Twist: That's all true, but the hassle comes in when you try to do this trip late at night or very early in the morning (i.e., after sexing and a little sleeping in the other location).

I think it's fair to say that any relationship that depends on the B train is doomed.

That blonde's family tree is a wreath, methinks. Let's hope all this shit breeds itself out.

MadameDecline

@valet_of_the_dolls: It helps that PC used to be a classmate of Ingrid Bergman's niece.

Give the kids a break! This may be the first (and possibly last) time they escape from under the suffocating Failure-to-Live-Up-to-Expectations... syndrome.

SteveManiac

PC's head looks like a bobble. It may fall off!

I like how he spasms in between "help build schools" and "you know, uplift a community (!)" as if there's some short-circuiting going on inside his brain and he's desperately trying to find any other suitable example of noblesse oblige.

zombie_dola

@Snarkastic: (I didn't go there, by the way)

Snarkastic

@nicepony: Sorry, but in my day, Dwight was not that elitist. They may have to wear preppy clothes, but they're kind of just burn-outs and upwardly mobile douche-bags with fancy scarves. Hardly the most offensive of Private Manhattan schools.

Snarkastic