People
Gossip Roundup: Jon And Kate Gosselin Plus Legal Eagles
Jon and Kate are packing legal heat, now; so is Evan Dando, and Kobe Bryant’s maid, too, which finally gives TMZ the opportunity to teach readers about legislative law. Also, Marilyn Manson and Nazi Pubes. Your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:
Oh, shit. Jon and Kate Gosselin might be lawyering up; Jon gave People an interview from a lawyer’s office. This sucks. [Page Six]
Pregnant R & B singer Kelis managed to Twitter – over a series of five or six Tweets – something about someone being a cheater, and cheaters cheating on people who don’t deserve to be cheated on. She’s probably talking about Nas, who she’s getting divorced from soon. Meanwhile, a few Tweets later, she gives us the following film review of “The Hangover,” out this weekend: “P.s there was a cute asian man in the movie. Very rare sighting so had to say it :)” In other news, Hipster Runoff is teaching celebrity blogging courses, somewhere. [P*r*z H*lt*n and Kelis' Twitter]
Jim Carrey’s in some kind of freaky New Age Eastern Think group. Go, Hollywood? This is kind of 1999ish. [Hollywood Reporter]
Evan Dando’s about to fuck. Some shit. Up. Except not. The Lemonheads’ lead singer is suing GM for using “It’s a Shame About Ray” in a bunch of their commercials without licensing it. As TMZ – who, really, is getting great at covering the legal affairs beat – explains, GM’s broke-phi-broke, and Dando’s lawsuit is kind of frivilous in that regard. Oh well. [TMZ]
Ha! TMZ’s educating their readership about California legislative power by demonstrating how Cali’s anti-SLAPP statues are helping Kobe Bryant’s maid talk to the press about her lawsuit against the Bryants. Next up: when and when not to engage in jury tampering. [TMZ]
Julia Roberts is in town filming Eat, Prey, Love and she’s renting a place at 1 Morton Square in the West-West Village. I’d drop off a basket, say hi, maybe try to get her or Danny Moder to do a guest blog post, but that shit’s so far west you need a visa to get there, so forget that. [Page Six]
Phil Spector’s 28 year-old girlfriend – only three years older than his daughter, it’s helpfully pointed out – says that this guy is a sex-crazed fiend, or at least that they did it all the time. [Page Six]
Marilyn Manson shaved a swastika into his new porn star girlfriend’s ladyparts, and he used a protractor to do it. This sounds like something you do when you’re 23 and going through your fifth year in college and the only girl you can bring home for the holidays is this batshit insane freshman goth, and your parents are talking about Republican politics at the dinner table, and you’re like, OH YEAH? WELL THERE’S A SWASTIKA IN HER VAG AND I PUT IT THERE, SO THERE! and even the girl is thoroughly embarrassed and dumps you when you get back to school. You should probably graduate and get through that rebellious phase, you know? It’s about time. Also, stop pretending to like The Smiths. [Kinda NSFW at Drunken Stepfather]
Blake Liveley and Penn Badgley were among the people who the W Hotel in Ft. Lauderdale paid to show up at the opening of their place. Penn’s rocking a beard and I kind of dig it, if only because it’s very “fuck you” to the teenage-celebrity-industrial-complex. Rebellion! Meanwhile, Ft. Lauderdale’s entirely geriatric population is psyched to hit the bumpin’ lounge at the Dub. [PopSugar]
Ron Weasley’s main squeeze, Hermione, is magical in real life: she’s doing all these fashion-forward things and the like. How can you not like Emma Watson? Seriously. She probably knows that if the real-life version of Hermione were a drunk moron, it’d be really sad. So she’s either saving it until the movies are done, or she’s an actual, responsible, image-conscious person in the best way. Which is, come to think of it, entirely possible. [Daily News]
Kevin Bacon is a responsible person when he flies the LA to NYC flight. He’s nice, courteous, and folds his blankets. And here’s where I explain that it’s nice to not write something salacious or stupid about this, or him. [TMZ]
Bury-The-Lede Obama Bonus! The Obama women visited the Eiffel Tower yesterday while Dad was in Germany on business. It’s their first trip abroad, ever. U Can Haz Jelusy. [NYDN]
Comments (AU Comments | US Comments)
I love the Obama family. Also the Ghosts of Old Girlfriends movie has what I'm calling the first "Obama" look alike, sound alike actor in an ass charming role.
Queen of the Passive Aggressives
Good for you, Jon! Lawyer up, my brothah.
Claire Keaveney
I never knew who Jon and Kate were until recently and wish I didn't now. Can't they just go away?
Cameron L. Mitchell
@snugbug: Too true.
GAG, *EYEROLL*, YUCK.
forwardmotion
@VoxPopuli:
Does her milkshake still bring the boys to the yard?
Anyone?
stanhalen
@Crabbie: Word. Just kill me now. And darned if I'm not going to have to rush out to see EPL. Compelled. Wearing my little hate coat and matching gloves.
Banjo-Sea Kitten
Ugh. Hate seeing Hermione all tarted up.
The Obamas took the kids to Kenya a couple of years ago, so this isn't their first trip abroad.
@Oxycontin Merry-go-round: Totes, and hopefully after they properly split the media will back off a bit because the story won't be as juicy, you know... for the kids.
@blakeley: TV was just an accelerant. Those two were doomed from day one.
@snugbug: It's perfect casting. PERFECT!
Crabbie
I love Evan Dando in a way that only a Boston girl who came of age in the 90s can, so I know you'll understand and hope that you'll forgive me for saying that I think it's awesome of him to sue GM. Hell yes.
Also I enjoyed this post. Don't let the spelling bee dorks get to you, grasshopper.
"Julia Roberts is in town filming Eat, Pray, Love.."
Oh mama. Thank you, Hollywood, for kicking up the annoyance factor of this bestseller into the stratosphere.. Elizabeth Gilbert got on my nerves like gangbusters in print; Julia Roberts has consistently and relentlessly got on my nerves through the 90s and 00s*. Looking forward to this movie; it might satisfy my masochistic needs for months and years to come.
*=Exception that confirms the rule: "Duplicity."
snugbug
@blakeley:
That's pretty clear. It seems like they have legitimate issues, which is why I'm positive about the whole thing. People arguably need to see kids and fame fail to save a marriage to develop healthier approaches to relationships.
Oh, and I call bullshit on the Marilyn Manson story. What porn star has pubic hair these days?
Or so I've heard.
Oh, Kelis. Blame your crazy on hormones while you still can.
@blakeley: Instead, you can smoke two bowls and go back to bed!
@Unsolicited Advice: I doubt it was just the pressure of being on a reality television show that pulled them apart.
The Eiffel Tower has been an inspiring site to every occupation army that has ever captured it.
@Foster Kamer: If we were at the office Julia would already have made us two pots by now... at least!
I'm sort of pleased at the Jon and Kate thing, actually. It's a national divorce with kids. Given that, what, 60% of marriages end in divorce it's probably a good thing for us to talk about every excruciating detail the public space. Good for us, not for them, but they wanted to be on teevee...
@BxgrlJeri: Oh, god. You guys are starting in already. I JUST WOKE UP. I thought you were asleep for an hour. Never. YOU NEVER SLEEP, GODDAAMNIT.
@Hirondelle: correct away. I love grammar/spelling nazis. I truly do. There's simply not enough of them these days wot w/ ev1 txtspkng
Julia Roberts is in town filming Eat, Prey, Love
Prey? Not Pray? There's gotta be some sort of cougar joke here. I'll hope this is a typo and not another Pursuit of Happyness thing where I have to concentrate very, very hard not to pull out a black marker and correct the display in the theater lobby.
Hirondelle
@Claire Keaveney: This is inexplicably funny. +5.
Marilyn Manson's swastika haircut? Sounds like Doucheland Uber Alles!
Martiniman