Sensing That Spring Is In Full Bloom, Natalie Presents

Princess Pantydala sports Spanx?

Grandma Moses: The Early Years

Picking up some extra change as Marlee Matlin's stunt double?

"This is the Church, This is the Steeple..."

"Why don't we do it (on a mat) in the road?"

New and Improved AMF Logo Adds Color.

depardoo

Men Seldom Make Passes at Girls Who are Gaseous

Between the glasses and the sanitary pad, even I, a geigh-sha, am sporting wood.

@zibby: Buff Drinklots!

Perhaps Not

@Perhaps Not: So in the future people will have no shame?

zibby

Natalie Porkmany...Damn glad to meet 'cha.

Itchy-Face

Cultural historians locate source of Summer 2009 hipster high jump trend/bone break epidemic.

was Sean Penn hanging around the set..

rustylinc

@WitchfinderGeneral: Those are stunt panties.

rustneversleeps

Is that a thumbs up from the guy on the right?

rustneversleeps

@bytememehard: Where's the pad? I see undies and a Spanx-esque control garment.

PoBoyNation

@SidAndFinancy:

That being said, I'd totally be following Natalie Portman around even if she was sporting a 24/7 gaseous cloud of certain death.

Nerdy Natalie Makes the Pole Vault. (You Can Say That Again!)

"Full bloomers?"

@zibby: "Didja see my butt?"

Perhaps Not

@The Lone Scout: Why don't yu have a seat right over there?

coyote1284

@Queen of the Passive Aggressives: It looks like an old pair of tights she cut. I do that to avoid showing my bottom when I wear skirts in the summer, you know, on the occasion of a hefty breeze. That skirt she is wearing is not form fitting (there is another pic on jezebel), so regardless of her size, she def does not need spanx.

pumpkinseed

@The Lone Scout: Really? Wasn't she, like, 12 in that movie?

PrincessKashmir

She's a size 0 yet wearing spanx.

Queen of the Passive Aggressives

Poor Natalie's nettled,
She'll get no gold medal,
To fall from fine fettle
Landing arse over kettle.

@SidAndFinancy: You're amazing.

DahlELama

American Apparel Ad Not As Appealing As Anticipated.

Once again, Natalie Portman's performance falls flat.

TableNine

@iplaudius: Yes. Just like a mandrill!

zibby

"Presents"? Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.                                                                                                    

Kurt Rambis Takes Nasty Spill

depardoo

Fosbury Photo Op

Portman's deplorably contorted comportment suggests that her motherboard may have had shorted.

Portman Looking Fann'tastic!

She engorged and receptive!

@SidAndFinancy: That's the one!

Jaleel White succumbs to Michael Jackson's mysterious skin ailment.

Scarlett Johansson Smugly Confident Over Rival's Failed Attempt to Imitate Opening Scene of "Lost in Translation."

I have to admit I still think about her in "The Professional." Often.

The Lone Scout

Ugly Booty

Who ordered the hot tossed buns?

"Clap on, Clap off...THE CLAPPER!" (clap, clap)

Spirit Fingers

@coyote1284: HA! Can I at least have some iced tea?

power_stroke

The high-jump is not for everyone.

bugupit

Gawd, if even Natalie Portman feels like she has to wear spanx, I am just going to kill myself now.

I_b_hatin

Yet I still find her to be super sexy...even with this photo. Hmmmm....