Gretel Killeen As Logies Host: The Verdict
Let’s ignore the fact that I was sleeping off illness and missed the live Logies broadcast. Who needs to actually watch it on Channel 9 these days, anyway? Between celebrities updating their Twitter accounts through out the night and citizens of this fine country uploading footage to YouTube, it’s possible to piece together an opinion on the event without ever having switched on your telly.
In my role of Forensic Blogtologist, I have searched far and wide online and gathered as much evidence as I can in the hope of delivering a verdict on Gretel’s performance as Logies host.
EXHIBIT A – THE PAPERS
Here’s what The Age had to say about Our Gretel.
Though her gags were not strong, the blame should not rest entirely with Killeen. Let us not forget that she was performing in front of a room full of actors. Surely they could have done a better job of pretending to have a good time.
This was a woman accustomed to controlling whooping hordes of Big Brother-obsessed teenagers. Her shtick was to channel that energy and transform it into something vaguely watchable. Confronted by a resoundingly non-shrieking audience, vaguely watchable proved mission impossible. There were moments during Killeen’s hosting duties last night when you could almost have heard a pin drop.
Ouch.
Sporting a radical new look, Killeen stumbled early with a series of self-deprecating jokes, which were met by indifference by the audience. This was followed by a skit that had Killeen supposedly shot and actor Steve Bisley saying “another death at the Logies”. He could have been talking about Killeen’s hosting performance up until then. The former Big Brother presenter appeared nervous and floundered on the stripped down pedestrian-looking set.
Poor Gretel. The one time she doesn’t want the crowd “quiet as a mouse”, she’s met with stony silence.
EXHIBIT B – YOUTUBE
The opening of the Logies (featuring the shooting sketch everyone keeps referencing).
- She gets a pretty big cheer when she arrives on stage! And her hair looks fierce.
- “This is TV’s night of night” – should have gone for the plural there, Gretel.
- Material is a bit weak, poor love. She’s not a stand up though, is she?
- Shane Bourne looks particularly unimpressed by the pyrotechnics display that was meant to indicate Gretel Killeen had been shot.
EXHIBIT C – TWITTER
Here are a few quotes from Twitterers on Gretel’s performance.
- “Gretel’s “acting” makes baby Jesus cry”
- “”Gretel Killeen’s material written by Gretel Killeen” – and therein lies the problem”
Both of those were from the very clever Ruth Brown from Crikey.
- “Gretel, you are NOT Andrew Denton. This is so. very. bad. “
Noted, dear NereadersDigest.
But wait! Is there someone willing to defend Our Gretel against the haters? Why yes indeed, and it’s MTV VJ Ruby Rose!
- Think gretel deserves FAR more laughs from the audience.. Come on guys… She’s fucking funny
- Yeah but its a tough gig, many would have declined and she has guts, wit and looks younger than when she was on big brother – great hair
And in response to someone saying Gretel is only known for Big Brother and even that’s dead and buried these days:
- Actually BB was the least of things she did, shes an amazing writer.. Check out her Literary works before you say something silly.
Bless.
VERDICT!
Look, from what I’ve seen she seemed to be struggling as host. But Ruby Rose is actually quite right when she says it’s a tough gig. Before I make a final decision, I need to confer with the cleverest folks in the land… DEFAMER AUSTRALIA READERS HAHAHAH YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE?!
What did you think about Gretel’s performance? Get your Margaret and David pants on, and rate her hosting using the much loved five star system in our comments section.
PS: Her hair really did look good. FIVE STARS FOR THAT, GRETEL!
Comments
Yep…our kitten Loki coulda done better. That Gibney girl is hot though.
Her hair DID look good, but I eventually realised she now looks like Gary Numan, which made things a little surreal.
3.5 stars from me.
Really. I though she looked a tad more like Norman Gunston.
Clearly she lacked respect from the audience. Addressing a pissed-up room full of actors on awards night is always a challenge, but they talked over her A LOT from her second or third appearance on. Given that, and how crap the whole production was, it’s amazing she held it together at all.
I don’t know who was responsible for putting her in a toilet, but bloody hell.
Oh, and a couple of years ago she guest-hosted GMA and was fantastic, so I don’t think her being ‘accustomed to controlling whooping hordes of Big Brother-obsessed teenagers’ is a valid defence.
…she’s awkward, isn’t she?
She looked like Captain Spock to me…..
Rebecca Gibney had a back fat cleavage.
If it’s too tight, don’t go there!
Was it just me, or did I hear her refer to her former husband as ‘dumb scum’? Classy touch there
The whole logies is substandard acting on substandard shows. Home and Away, Neighbours…wouldnt use any of my energy to switch on Underbelly and the likes of two bob shows like Rove…serioulsy lame humour….the hosting of such is compared to the content.
Bad bad bad and awfully lame.
Gretel makes Wendy Harmer look like a genius.
Yes, her haircut made her look like Spock. Apart from that I think she did an okay job. She was clearly nervous at the beginning but seemed to relax after a bit. You know when you watch someone dying on stage and you feel really embarrassed for them and want it to end for their own sake? I didn’t get that feeling watching Gretel. I think some people are a bit too eager to find fault with the Logies and whoever is hosting it (but they tried Shaun Micallef and I thought he was great but the rest of Australia dind’t get it). The Logies are what they are. My question and it may be controversial is this: How is it that Natalie Bassingthwaigthe often looks much less prettier (scuse grammar)than she actually is? And older than she is? I think her stylist needs to think about this.
I think its foul for envious, self-opiniated, second rate “personalities” to so viciously critique a colleague just because she got a job they all wanted. How the hell would boring, unfunny Will Anderson know how Gretel was performing if he was so busy twittering through her entire performance? I give Will five stars for being a thorough moron.
Part of me hopes you are Gretel Killeen. Wil Anderson needs someone to have another hugely public barney with, it’s been a while since the infamous Shannon Noll verbal fisticuffs.
Part of me wished I was Gretel Killeen also, until last night of course, because now her life sucks.
Didnt her life suck before ? I mean hosting one of the worst reality shows in the history of television (excluding Australian Idol) Big Brother…now that should account for her ability to host anything. But I suppose the mental depth of the Australian TV industry (and followers) are about the same level as Big Brother fans.
Poor Gretel. I really like her, but I thought she was smart enough to know this; Logies = death. She did a good enough job IMHO, but the highlight for me was in the ladies room, when Ruby Rose was searching for a nice woman (she’s hot and lovely-separate thoughts) then Kerri-Anne practically got shoved into the frame, but steadied herself with a quip about how she missed sexual harrassment. Carson saved the segment though as he always does.
Seems to me that the Logies should not be televised, and everyone knows this, but they persist in putting it on as it IS an institution we all love to take the piss out of, and let’s face it, we would all whinge and whine if it were ever abolished.
I’m sorry but that new hair-do made her look like an elf from Lord of the Rings,Did she have to have it SO short,anyway she did her best but it wasn’t good enough, She was just wrong for the gig
could of been worst it could of been Shelly Craft!
oh wait she’s hosting next year, what’s wrong with geting a duo like Hamish & Andy, or Adam Hills & Cal Wilson ? As soon as I herd Gretel I got a cold shiver down my spine, who thought of her? she should stick with novels.
Very tough gig that’s for sure but she still made me cringe.
But then I also cringed with much of the people’s voting – but them’s the breaks with the GP out there.
Shame about Adam Hill and other ABC/SBS excellence overlooked – but thats non commercial television – who watches that………
Hey Page U are right about all the ABC guys getting overlooked once again but then again 15&16
teens wont be watching the ABC, Maybe Spicks n’
Specks is too educational for them. I just wish those Dumb kids would stop voting for Rove, I mean come on! he just keeps recycling the same jokes since his 1st season, the show is only funny
when Hughesy,Hamish & Andy are on.
Im not a massive fan of Killeen, but I think she did a magnificent job as host. It is a very difficult and brave role to undertake and I think she should actually be congratulated for her composure whilst being haggled by a restless and drunken crowd of industry professionals.
Also juggling the role with lame and boring pre-prepared skits and reading from an autocue. C’mon- she did a great job
Yes Gretel is the author of a number of mediocre children’s books but that doesn’t make her a literary genius.
Her hosting at the Logies in my opinion was shocking. Add to she was a bitter and rude and as always loved to talk down to her interviewees.
Awkward performance yes but like a car wreak, many in the audience and as expressed on Twitter cannot bear to turn away. Perhaps that is the intention of the Network when they asked her to host. Any publicity is good publicity and a controversial host cannot be bad for ratings.
“her hair really did look good”?
I thought she looked like a Vulcan.
I’m amazed Channel Nine is incapable of producing a program that looks goods and is actually interesting to watch. It seriously looked like a 1970’s set with the ‘personalities’ being deliberately ironically crap. I fail to see how winning a ‘Logie’ has any value. It’s almost a mark of shame. They should get the producers of So You tHink yOu can Dance to produce it- it would have the same level of substance and credibilty but at least it would look good.
you try host it and then see how you go
Having read the reviews of (quote, unquote) “professional critics” and the disgraceful and undeserved bagging on multiple websites, I’ve come to the conclusion that Australians are nothing but a bunch of heartless backstabbing bitches. Everyone seems to have been out to knock Gretel down from the start. Her hosting duties and admittedly at times awkward moments were nowhere near as bad as previous Logies hosts. The whole show is our pathetic attempt to be like American award shows and it has never cut it. Gretel as far as I am concerned has personality and is a damn good host and far better than half of the other media personalities that have hosted previously.
Her hair makes her head look teensy and her face look really really fat! Not a good combination, sadly. I didn’t watch the stupid show as I had no illusions about how Gretel, Natalie and the rest of the horrendous line-up would go and had no intention of subjecting myself to such a brain-sucking experience (much like my approach to BB). So I blissfully watched other stuff on other channels and forgot it was on.
Oh and just quietly – the Crikey person’s first comment is actually a common-as-muck phrase and is not her own clever or even original work.
The “[insert name of thing you want to insult] makes baby jesus cry” quip was a standard long-term joke on that popular internet snark-fest “The Spin Stars Here” – the phrase is about as original as “gets up my nose” or “makes me puke”.
The phrase “makes baby Jesus cry” comes from The Simpsons (Todd Flanders: “Lies make baby Jesus cry”). Doesn’t mean Ruth Brown’s comment was any less funny though.
Bethany Dortmans wrote: The phrase “makes baby Jesus cry” comes from The Simpsons (Todd Flanders: “Lies make baby Jesus cry”). Doesn’t mean Ruth Brown’s comment was any less funny though.
True, but the phrase was around well before the simpsons even existed.
I had to switch channels when Gretel was on I’m afraid. She was bad to the point I felt sorry for her. On the other hand, someone pointed out correctly the audience had their minds made up before she even started. Would’ve thought they would be a bit more understanding considering they were actors and would know what a bloody hard job it is to host the logies. Also I am sick of trying to be like America comments. Australia’s homegrown talent of actors and actresses have the right to acknowledge their achievements just like the rest of the world do. How else would our now famous stars like Kidman, Watts, Crowe, Ledger, Geoffrey Rush amongst many many others would’ve been discovered? Through youtube? Anyway, I thought the whole night was mediocre to say the least, and Gretel didn’t make it any better. I think there is only one direction her career is going to be at after her hosting role, and that is out the door and off our tv screens…(fingers crossed just in case)
P.S: Maybe they should cut out the booze during the show, Fatty Vautin as always looked drunk while accepting his logie! Would of been interesting to watch Reg Reagan host the show though. All in all, the whole thing was…mehhh
Gretel Kileen was always a crap host. It was like she was always set to ‘cringe-worthy’ on Big Brother. Why did people think she was going to be a good host anyway? At least her hosting skills match the prestige of the Logies.
I really can’t stand Gretel but I felt so sorry for her. What makes Will Anderson et al think they are any funnier? I am sick of these moronic (and talentless), so called “personalities”, who think that they are somehow the intelligentsia of Australian society. Wake up you wankers and try to think about how you would feel if your peers did that to you! I very much doubt most of them would do a better job.