ABC Internal Video Teaches Us How To Market A Shitty Show
US ABC’s marketing department is so hardcore that they will get Mickey Mouse to hand out cigarettes to children if that’s what it takes to get people to watch their crappy shows!
We got leaked this parody video starring the network’s marketing heads Mike Benson and Marla Provencio in which they “pimp” a made-up show called The Smoking Clown. For fourteen profanity-laden minutes, the crack team guides us through the soulless business of commodifying and selling something you absolutely hate. Everything is covered smarmily—from bitchy contract-waving actors, to competition with other networks, to strategies for ensnaring lucrative and elusive kids’ eyeballs.
And while it’s all pretty ha ha, sure, it’s also pretty insidious. In that, while The Smoking Clown doesn’t exist, utter ABC dreck like Private Practice does. And, through all of the nefarious means depicted here, the show is fed to and lapped up by brain-addled regular Americans. They’re being manipulated, people! And ABC are just sitting back and laughing.
Keep an eye out for Lost co-creators Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse playing themselves. Network cross-promotion!
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Comments (AU Comments | US Comments)
No one knows how to market smoking like Fox
+ Watch video
FaceMelter
I think these are the douche bags responsible for all those years of 'According to Jim'. Lets get 'em!!
every time someone said "fucking brilliant" I wanted to stab them in the fucking face with a fucking chain saw.
I pity whoever is forced to watch this as a team building exercise.
@TedSez: That right there made my day.
Krusty: "They drove a dumptruck full of money up to my house. I'm not made of stone!"
@5:12 the assistant comes in to tell them that NBC has a competing show called the "Snorting Clown."
i'm a bottle
That clown looks familiar.
Well, that too-long bit explains a lot about ABC's lineup.
Damn! How about now?
+ Watch video
I hope I did this right...
Thanks for the heads up it's 14 minutes. No way can I click on something that sounds like an even shittier version of the job interview "Sell me this pen" crap.
although long, this was head and shoulders above the one we made one christmas for the CW marketing/promo department that i worked for at the time. i laughed really hard at the "Temp" scenes because that was in literally every promo for the CW until we got the final elements to put in for broadcast. and yes, the temp scenes are really that lame in real life.
"From all the producers of LOST, but not JJ Abrams."