10 Cheesy TV Show Opening Credits
Even our own nostalgia for these TV shows doesn’t mean we forgive—or even understand the WTF-ness of—their opening credits. After the jump, a rundown of some of the most offensive.
1.) Full House, obvs. What didn’t make the list was Taradise—Tara Reid’s now defunct travel show—but that’s only because I scoured the internet for it and it’s NOWHERE to be found. Anyway, here’s the rest of the list.
2.) Here’s Blossom, and her face.
3.) Bridget’s Sexiest Beaches has maybe the worst/best song.
4.) I cannot even wrap my mind around the intro for the latest installment of The Real World/Road Rules Challenge. I don’t know if I should mock them, or applaud them for keeping straight faces during their performances.
5.) Remember when Oprah sang her own theme song with Patti LaBelle? I tried to find the actual opening sequence used for the show, but Oprah controls the world and internet now, so we’ll have to do with this.
6.) I genuinely like the theme song for the canceled soap Passions, but it gives no indication that this show involves sorcery and dolls who come to life as little people.
7.) I love to hate staged opening credits that feature cast members doing things, and then stopping and looking at the camera. Case in point: Family Matters
9.) I find Night Court to be guilty of this as well.
10.) Even though Ray Charles was obviously still alive when this Designing Women theme was filmed, it looks like they’re all hanging out with him in heaven.
Bonus:
I don’t know why I loved Zoobilee Zoo so much as a child, because really, I should have been terrified.
10 cheesy tv show opening credits
blossom
clips
family matters
full house
night court
passions
tv
zoobilee zoo
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@EsmereldaFitzmonster: I LOVED that show. Matthew was my first crush.
Did anyone mention Magnum P.I.?
@mcq: Cluth my pearls! You've never seen Night Court? Oh my stars and garters, you need to head to YouTube pronto and discover the joy of the magic of Harry Andersen.
Real life magic! And Markie Post hair! Which is just like magic, but with lots of flammable hairspray!
@Joyce Carol Hall and Oates: ACK! I just google image searched it! Why did I do that?!?!! Why are there pictures of Ruthie in her underwear!!!!!?!?!?!
@haguenite: FTW!! I was always kind of sad that Lila wasn't as awesome on TV as she was in print.
@Everything MidnightBikeRide does is a balloon.: Maybe this is where my love of redheaded boys began?
@Everything MidnightBikeRide does is a balloon.: Yeah because it was a REAL band! Pete & Pete was awesome, I was already in junior high [high school?] when it was on but I loved it.
@Vivi21: *slow clap*
Uncommon Whore
I was actually hunting all around for that Oprah theme song recently! It really is nowhere to be found.
Oh! And my sister and I always used to be allowed to stay up to watch Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman... even though I would hide my eyes at the bloody parts!
@[www.imdb.com]
adoranora
That road rules thing is ridiculous, i bet some of them prepared their "intense" face. Also i just pictured a tiny tracie singing along to the Zoobilee Zoo song. Which in my head was precious.
xuatastic
@EsmereldaFitzmonster:
Oh. My. God. I LOVED THIS SHOW. I was so excited to go to college after watching it. And then I discovered 10 years later that Dwayne Wayne does not exist furrealsies, that I am more Whitley than I care to remember and that my mommy has her own TiTi the dog that replaced me when I went away.
"Empty Nest" is incredibly dated as well as cheesy.
@Jello Mix inspired Little Chocolate Donuts, No. 5: I can envision this whole thing from memory without having to watch it. SCIENCE RULES!
I repressed all memories of Zoombilee Zoo intil now thank you.
BitchyD
@Everything MidnightBikeRide does is a balloon.: "Mom's Plate". I will always have love for this show!
@hortense: You're taking me back to Friday nights spent on my bed with my cat watching TV. How did I watch this without aid of laptops.
@hortense: omygod hortense! yes. that is all I can say.
@megnificent: Any show that has a character named "Donkey Lips" is a winner.
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: You are killing me with these today! I loved Parker Lewis!
@Fridge Hussy : Emissary of Hell: Oh, Ducktails.
On the 80s/90s cartoons front, I have to add:
Dodgergirl
I always loved a Different World... definitely has the cheesy credits going for it.
@burningdinner: It's the baby, who is named Baby. I was a creative kid, obv!
She has both arms and both legs but her pipe cleaner hair is gone and all the lace that used to go aroudn ehr body is gone too. She's also gray in color and a little lumpy but I think she should get some slack because she's 22 years old - and in pillow person age that's like, what, 128?
@m4mugatu: Hey, don't hate on Mark. He's made himself a career, and you should respect that!
Plus, his has rocking abs and looked hot in his speedo.
@haguenite: YES. This is one of my favorites.
@schweppes: Oh my! I had forgotten that particular repressed memory. That even has Bosom Buddies beat:
@SkipToMyLou: I was encouraged to Watch Dad's Army (my dad's favourite show), but not Hogan's Heroes. Why? "Because the war is over!"*
* They are both set during WWII!
Kids Incorporated... K-I-D-S OOooooh it's something something cuz we're Kids Incoooorporaaaated!
@colormeroutine: I had a black crushed velvet one with rosettes made out of the same fabric! And a denim one with a pink flower!
OH GOD TGIF!
Twin Peaks. Not cheesy but completely awesome and weird.
honeydooo
Wow, I sure miss me some Night Court, it makes me think of college. I hear the theme song and immediately think "bong hits."
SomeAuthorGirl
Square One TV (How awesome that there was entire TV show about math, and it was good, too!)
Ok, my favorite show opening isn't particularly clever, but it makes me happy.
@Jello Mix inspired Little Chocolate Donuts, No. 5: I loved this show soooo much!!!
cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
@Fridge Hussy : Emissary of Hell: those, along with Tiny Toon Adventures are the best cartoon themes ever.
@hortense: In the winter we always traveled on the weekends to go skiing and we'd leave on Friday after my dad got home from work. I relished the days that he had to stay late so that we could catch some of TGIF before the three hour car ride.
@Jello Mix inspired Little Chocolate Donuts, No. 5: BILLBILLBILLBILL!
@thecameralovesyou: HA! Awesome!
HELP! I CANNOT STOP WATCHING THESE VIDEOS!
Tracie we have our differences sometimes but man, this is the most addictive thing ever.
I really loved Zoobilee Zoo as a kid too but I was always, ALWAYS, afraid of the Fox guy. I cannot watch that clip because I know he'll appear.
@veronykah: Me too! Crazy. Those neurons must be permanently wired up after the hours of my formative years spent watching cartoons.
brinkswomanship
@devilchyld22: I'm wondering if the Maori people are a little offended by this? I know lots of rugby teams do the haka before games, but still.
librariansti
@megnificent: I totally forgot about this show, I remember watching this and Wild and Crazy Kids.
BitchyD
I love shows that are so high-concept that the entire backstory needs to be explained to you with the opening theme. I suppose Gilligan's Island or The Brady Bunch are über famous examples, but I especially love Remington Steele or A-Team.
MyNameIsChris
@Hamsterpants: What I want to know is what are those writers doing now, because that is some crazy I could use more of.
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: Then your mum and I have a fantastic interest in common. It was actually on again for a while during dinner time last year, and I got sucked in again, straight away. And no matter how many times I had already watched that ep where David plummets to his death, I cried when it was on again!
@EsmereldaFitzmonster: I used to watch it during summer vacations. It was on in the morning. I had no clue what was going on, either, but loved the dog.
@hatepaperdoll: I love the "Therrrrrrre were TIMES... I'd lost a dream or twoooooo" part. Sa-man-thuh!
@PersonalBest: Oh god, was that episode terrifying! Wasn't there one with enormous spiders or something? I'm recalling evil spiders.
Pshaw - this is the best. Got it as my ring tone and everything
Night Court opening rules!!! I always loved the graffiti'ed subway trains, and the smoke coming out the street and the cab. Sure, the actor shots are cheesy, but the music rules...where would the Seinfeld theme song be without it?
@AwkwardTurtle: Hahah - well it makes sense, to call her Baby - that's what her pillow says!!! I'm so jealous - I wonder where Tuesday is...
@hortense: That was my Saturday morning, pre-cable and I am a grown woman.
I have low TV standards.
@pandorasmittens: I have noticed that my embeds have a tendency to fail. Help. anyone? Buehler?
@katie.scarlett.o'hara: Oh man, that was a sad day. It was like "Yes, she has lots of cool costumes and wigs. That's nice. Can I have my black screen back?"
But it does make me want to pull out my Alias DVDs...
Dodgergirl
Where is "Hey Dude"? That's one of my faves. I will always heart David Lascher. The day he left that show a part of me died. Good-bye, Ted, Good-bye, it feels like I could cry. Indeed.
@girlwonder: It was supposed to be a video of the One Day at a Time opening. I have no idea what I'm doing wrong, and am going to give up now and enjoy everyone else's videos.
@Vivi21: This reminds me of the day a co-worker and I (also a fellow jez) broke out into this song for no reason in particular. People thought we were crazy. Oh, I miss watching this show.
thatsleepyperson
@maneki neko: OMG YES
@burningdinner: Good God, I'm glad you warned me! I think I might have to pass.
This might be a bit of a niche one but this was by far and away my favourite theme song as a kid:
Fighting evil by moonlight! Winning love by daylight!
brinkswomanship
@hollygolightly: It was Travis Schuldt, BTW, and he played Ethan Crane, the "hunk" of the show.
I feel like such a nerd.
@Samanthrax: We share the same ritual. Do you also round it out with a Golden Girls afternoon?
And to complete the TGIF lineup:
@hortense: That is going to be in my head for weeks now.
Something about mid-to-late 80's TV themes, really--they were all that hyper-optimistic. It's disturbing now.
@hortense: Perfect Strangers is probably my favorite sit-com of all time. The chemistry between Balki and Larry is awesome! I own the first two seasons on DVD, but there is no word yet if season 3 will be released. I am dying to get the whole series!
audiochick
@hovy: And Bull the Bailiff!
Seriously - Night Court may be in fact the reason why I am now an attorney...
@EsmereldaFitzmonster: hahah my mother was obsessed with this show. i remember being 3 or 4 and being scared of that horribly huge dog.
@Khrushchev: THIS IS OUT ON DVD NOW. I am so excited! (I'm so scared!)
@Pieces of Pi... delicious pi....: Yeah, Timmy's demise was the end of my Passions-watching too. Shame, when I looked up all the crazy that happened afterwards I kind wish I had stuck it out.
andonthatnote
@thatonegirlsays: BET just started airing episodes on their channel, although I'm not sure what time. I'm thinking it's at night, but I love accidentally catching it. It makes me so happy.
@hortense: Haha, I loved the song so much when I was a kid. Still kinda do...
"Standing taaaaaalll on the wings of my dream/Rise and faaaaaalll on the wings of my dream..."
It's my life, my dream. Nothing's going to stop me now.
HuggaWugga
@megnificent:
Ug: Budnick, why aren't you swimming in the lake?
Budnick: Cuz fish fart in it.
I totally agree with Budnick.
@pandorasmittens: You're special just because you're you!
OMG, Passions! I remember the huge ad campaign for its first season when I was in high school.
I even met one of the original guys from that show, randomly, at a sports bar. He was really nice and I gave him my opinion on his love interests on the show like he was really his character. How embarrassing.
@SkipToMyLou: I think it's funny sometimes, what parents won't allow, like this girl I knew whose parents worked for Coca Cola, she was forbidden from even trying Pepsi. My parents are from India and they banned me from doing/watching TONS of stuff that they called "too American" because they were afraid I'd assimilate(sorry!). I was basically allowed to watch PBS(public television), Full House and Family matters, because they showed good Indian family values.
@EsmereldaFitzmonster: aretha sings the hell outta that song!
@mbot in ... Hushed Rapings: Oh, I don't know how to embed things...
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: OOOOOOOOOOOH MYYYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOOOD. I haven't heard The Country Practice Theme for so long! I think I may have blown something in my brain. Molly! Esme!
brinkswomanship
@honeydooo: Oh yes! The spooky theme tune was great!
cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
@veronykah: Ohhh the Real Monsters!! Now they were great!
@girlwonder: Crap! Embed fail!
The theme to Night Court is ALWAYS stuck in my head.
@raysanni: Oh and tale spin of course!
@audiochick: The distinct lack of the Perfect Strangers opening here is a crime to 80s sitcomdom...
@brinkswomanship: Sorry, that was supposed to say - they give it away in the credits that she's the moon princess from episode 1, but the post ate my html tags.
brinkswomanship
@mbot in ... Hushed Rapings: I still know the Fibanocci sequence due to this show.
@formerly it takes a lot to laugh: She's sorry if some of the video links don't work. She sent this from her fucking iPhone.
JessaFields
@pandorasmittens: Yes, but it was the version I grew up with so I still have a soft spot for it, even though since then I've watched them all again in Japanese!
I especially love how in the English version they that she's the moon princess from episode 1!
brinkswomanship
@tell Dolly Parton again: I'm still not over them swapping in a new Vivian Banks on The Fresh Prince.
BellaNotte
@Fridge Hussy : Emissary of Hell: Ducktales FTW! The fam and I were recently talking about old tv shows, and my dad couldn't believe that I still remembered the words to the opening.
sassafras
@femputer: Purely from memory 12 years ago in college when for some random reason Michigan television would air it every day at lunch, and I became addicted:
"Neiiighbours,
everybody needs good neiiighbors,
with a little understanding,
you can find the perfect blennnnd....
Neighbours,
Should be there for one another,
That's when good neighbours, become, good, friends!!!!"
formergr
@hortense: You can watch full episodes on Youtube! Huzzah!
Wanna laugh?! These are classic!!!
Nicole Sanabria Shelton
And I know Daria was an animated show but you can't deny the awesomeness of, "You're standing on my neck. LA LA LA LA LAAAA."
@brinkswomanship: The English dub of that show was so wonderfully awful.
@PersonalBest: Yeah! All shows from before about 1990 have really long opening themes. Any show that's been on for more than a season now tends to ditch it altogether in favor of a two-second thing where the title card comes up.
@artyfarty: If I am able, you bet!
@KerrySlade4: YES!! I cried myself to sleep for a week after watching that episode.
dingdang
Ok, some of y'all might not know this one, but I was an anime freak and I used to LOVE this show. And the theme is cheese-tastic:
@hortense: I think that the intro to "Perfect Strangers perfectly" captures the experience of immigrants to America.
They leave their homeland with very little. Find a relative to help guide them through this new experience. And then get involved in a series of wacky adventures and teach us all a little bit about ourselves in the process.
@maneki neko: I was too old for it, but my best friend's little brothers loved "Pokemon" and also "Digimon." I'm not sure what the difference was between the two, but I loved both of the theme songs.
JessaFields
How come no one has mentioned this one yet?
and my favorite to sing along to! JOHNNY MATHIS!
and lastly
@Ninja Robot Pirate: Fooouuuund a traaaail, and at the end was you!
@librarianette: huh, would you look at that, all i had to do was paste in the url
amazing
@hortense: Or press enter, rather.
@+ Watch video
i don't know how to imbed video, but you really need to watch it to see the stark contrast between the two.
Comments (AU Comments | US Comments)
@femputer: Oddly, enough, no. Not until I was old enough to really make my own TV watching decisions. I remember when Home & Away began, becuase I was allowed to watch that.
Do you need a Nighbours refresher?
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I know every word to this one without even thinking about it: Brand new life! Brand new life around the bend!
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@femputer: I've never seen the L Word, so I have no idea what the into is like, but from what you have here, all I can think of is the Sound of Music.
Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes....
twinkette
@Everything MidnightBikeRide does is a balloon.: Wow, when I was a child I did not realize this song was actually good.
@Khrushchev: Do you remember that show "Running the Halls?" Because NOBODY ever remembers it and it was a part of that lineup for at least one season.
@Jello Mix inspired Little Chocolate Donuts, No. 5: I loved Bill Nye! He remains the basis of all of my science education.
Family Matters is the reason I call every who spells their name Stephen (traditionally pronounced Stephen) Stephaaaaan. Oh hot Steve. How I love thee
porto-hottie
Oh snap! Zooblie Zoo!!
And do they even have enough road rulers left to keep doing these challenges?!
@fol_de_rol: Yo you need to google Ruthie and see what she looks like now. It will BLOW. YOUR. MIND.
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This was my all-time favorite show opening! Whenever the music started playing, I would literally sprint to the TV and sit really, really close to it and watch it.
*sigh* I miss Rugrats...
@SkipToMyLou: Well, I just linked to Flying Doctors! Though that was cheesy too.
@pennycandy: I just assumed they probably did the openings after the shows...but now I'm not sure.
@rednrowdy: Haha me too!
@Uncle_Billy_Slumming: THANK YOU. I loved this show and knew the whole song (even the spoken opening. Good call.
@VegetableServing: These people have zero shame...and what is Mark, like 45 now?
Can we take this moment to remember the random daughter character on Family Matters who literally just disappeared one season? It's SO WEIRD when TV shows do that!
@hortense: Oh, Evie. You had it made.
Ducktales?
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I loved Animaniacs. I thought I was so clever when I got the references to Boutros Boutros Ghali!
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Not cheesy, just straight up AWESOME...I bring you
PETE AND PETE
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Reading Rainbow!!!
also I hearted everyone who loved Zoobilee Zoo
@Jenavira: agreed, but tell me you didn't cringe even harder when Carmen first met Shane and HAD to play her this really hot track, and it was some silly mashup of the theme song "this is the w-w-w-ay that we- the way that we li-i-i-live"
You are making me remember how much I LOVED my "autographed" ticket stub from a live Zoobilee Zoo show (or maybe it was just a meet and great) from the Children's Museum in Boston. I thought I was the shit.
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: I would always try to emulate her dance moves too!
@maneki neko: YESYESYESYESYESYESYES!
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: Exploding pants FTW!
@AwkwardTurtle: Which one????
I used to have the little girl and the baby - named Monday and Tuesday, respectively. Such originality I exhibited at such a young age...
@hortense: I begged my mom to let me stay up late to watch this.
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Bill Nye the Science Guy deserves a mention, for sure.
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@formerly it takes a lot to laugh: I would like for you to throw a soda bottle down my hallway.
And the Grey's Anatomy opening! So cheesy and creepy...I;m glad they got rid of them (not that I, ahem, still watch Grey's or anything. Yeah.).
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@mizprickers: You're showing a video of the New Zealand haka, not a Tongan haka. There are tons of different hakas and BTW, they're not always a war dance.
On point, howevs, the cultural appropriation in that opening is gross.
@SkipToMyLou: I cried when they played the full intro
I'm slightly obsessed with all reality shows' opening credits. How do they keep a straight face? Does it take up an entire day - how awkward is it? especially when they are all strangers and have to do crazy poses together?
Like, Why did all the girls bite their bottom lip in the Paradise Hotel's opening?
or If I was in the Hell's Kitchen opening, would I cross my arms or do something crazy - do they even know what the graphics are?
or if me and my bf were in The Amazing Race opening, what activity would we be doing? would we stand back to back and glare?
am I alone in this? probably.
My Two Dads:
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@Samanthrax: Well, with Fergie involved the deck was stacked, no? She'd cut a bitch.
@Jello Mix inspired Little Chocolate Donuts, No. 5: Heehee, "slight danger." She might fall, and maybe scrape her arm! I'm a bit sad that I remember that exact episode.
I just realized that the main parts of the house from Family Matters, Full House and the Wonder Years (a sad exclusion, btw) are eerily similar. Race and excessive decorative plants are the only differences.
Katxyz
Also, I choke up whenever I hear this
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because the memories of being bathed, wrapped in a gigantic towel, put down in a corner of our big couch and allowed to stay up a whole our late to watch Flying Doctors if I was really, really quiet come flooding back.
Those were some good Saturday nights.
@TheFormerJuneBronson: What struck me is that you hardly ever see opening credits that last 1:30 anymore.
I watched this show all the time when I was little and the main lesson I learned: Never get stuck in an abandoned fridge.
PersonalBest
@Fridge Hussy : Emissary of Hell: Balki!!! (is that how it was spelled??)
@hortense: I've got that stuck in my head now just from looking at the still.
@Vivi21: I meant to put the ellipsis before the "Chillin' out"...sigh.
Vivi21
night court was real?!?! i thought it was made up when i saw it on arrested development!
mcq
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: is she wearing birkenstocks in the opening dance outfit?
Out of this World:
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@SkipToMyLou: I wasn't allowed to watch Full House either although I don't know why, I'm american so it's not that
I also wasn't alowed to watch You Can't Do That on Television
My favorite was the Clarissa Explains It All intro...my friend and I used to pretend, whenever we did an imaginary game, that we were on TV and so we'd actually do an "opening credit" montage (and they ended up being Clarissa-style, every time.)
posy
@hortense: Oh my god I totally forgot about this show. Peter Engel was like the master of my childhood.
This is giving away my relative youth here, but Pokemon? Anyone?
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@megnificent: Because that isn't cheesy; it's high art! Camp Anawanna, we hold you in our hearts.... (I don't even need to watch the clip you posted to recall all the lyrics)
@SkipToMyLou: I'm from Australia too and I wasn't allowed to watch Neighbours or Home and Away. At the time it was a tragedy but I'm ok about it now!
cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
@Fridge Hussy : Emissary of Hell:
rise and faaaaaaaaaaaaaall!
on the wings of my dreams!
@hortense: This is weird. This is the second time I've seen this video this week.
@femputer: I am so glad I am not the only one who found that opening cringe inducing! But then again The L Word was wonderfully over the top and a perfect soap opera.
@hortense:
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Remember when they changed the Alias credits so that they nearly gave you a seizure when you watched them? I DO.
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And they had been kind of cool and simple before. Less is more, tv dolts.
@hortense: I know, right? The sadder thing is that I probably sing both the "California Dreams" and the "Hang Time" theme songs weekly.
@hortense: I loved how Balky was pen-friends with Wayne Newton!
@Khrushchev:
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@mbot in ... Hushed Rapings: I kept TRYING to remember wtf this show was. It creeped me out so bad as a child. I'm still afraid of whatever Zaboombafoo might be because of the similarity of names.
@Fridge Hussy : Emissary of Hell: Whoops. Someone beat me to it!
My favorite (if only for the song)
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Kidd Video FTW.
redqueenmeg
@GatsbysLover: I actually loathed "Friends", so I'll second that emotion.
@otherginger: Oh, now that IS nice. On the intro they even sing it badly - like all out of tune. I bet the band singalong was actually fun.
@Khrushchev: Again, you have split my sides. And renewed my childhood crush on Matt from that show.
southernbelle
@Uncommon Whore: Chillin' out, ...maxin', relaxin' all cool, and I'm shootin' some bball outside my school when a couple of guys who were up to no good, started making trouble in my neighborhood, I got in one little fight and my mom got scared, she said "You're moving with your auntie and uncle to Bel Air".
"I pulled up to a house about seven or eight and I said to the cabbie, "Yo holmes, smell you later!" Looked at my kingdom I was finally there, to sit on the throne as the Prince of Bel Aire!"
Vivi21
@hortense: C-I-T-Y you can see why...
EKane
@femputer: I'm friending you for the Zoobilee Zoo love
@happysquid: I mean, I love them too, but they're sooooooooo bad.
@VegetableServing: Seriously, that is so freaking strange. I have to change the channel and turn it back when I know it's over.
You all have noticed that no shows have full credits anymore, right? They would never spend hat ad time on a minute and half of the same dumb song every week. I watched the final of ER the other night and they showed the full credits at the beginning and it was weeeeird.
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: I had soooo many of those hats. My two favorites were a denim one with pink trim and a giant sunflower stuck on top and one made entirely out of red crushed velvet
colormeroutine
@hortense: AWWWWWWWWW, GOLDEN RETRIEVER PUPPY!!!!!
@Samanthrax: And starring Happy the dog, as himself!
@Uncommon Whore: Blossom was right after. And I can't watch a Phillies game without singing the whole song. My husband says its getting old but I think it is tradition at this point.
southernbelle
@Khrushchev: Sky above, sand below, good vibraaaaaaaations! Feelin' mellow!
I am embarrassed at how quickly those lyrics came to me.
I can't believe no one has mentioned Salute your Shorts. Where is your appreciation for fart jokes, people?
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Take me away, Mayor Ben!
Kari? Is that you? What have you done with Tracey?
Does anyone remember Parker Lewis Can't Lose? What happened to Corin Nemec? He was sooooo cute!
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cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
@femputer: ugh. totally cringe-worthy.
acrobatic rabbit
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: I had a floppy hat, no flower on it though - too shy.
@SkipToMyLou: So you must've watched a lot of "Neighbours"? To this day, I cannot get that damn opening song out of my mind (but I don't remember the lyrics, just the tune, so that I hear "Neiiigh-booourrs...Neighbours, Neighbours, Neighbours, Neighbours, Neiiiighbouuurs")
@burningdinner: There is a pillow person under my bed. My mother has sewn her legs back on about 1,000 times and she doesn't have hair left but she is definiately still a pillow person.
There was music playing during Bridget?
rte148
@hortense: City Guys!! CITY GUYS!!!!
@+ Watch video
@fol_de_rol: You all are a bunch on nutbags.
My first repressed memory--Zoobilee Zoo. I am still shaking in terror. Why did they have to have such scary faces?
WHAT? NO PERFECT STRANGERS?
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COUSIN LARRRY!
@hortense: I just feel like putting on my tube socks and running a marathon to this song. And then jumping up in the air at the end, fist pumping the air. It's THAT triumphant.
acrobatic rabbit
now i'm laughing at the night court theme sequence credits because i'm remembering the 30 rock episode.
Please. You know SVH is where it's at!
"Is she really everywhere or a reflection!"
Totally! She's fantastic! Made of Plastic! This title sequence actually blows all other staged opening credits away!
Stephanie Bencin
@Khrushchev: I just snorted up a chocolate chip cookie crumb reading that, and damn it hurts so good.
southernbelle
@Khrushchev: You can't Hang at Hang Time unless you first roll with the City Guys. That's just the way it is when you're trying to make your California Dreams come true.
oh, brilliant.
i remember singing the oprah theme that patti sang way, way, waaaaay back.
i still liked the oprah theme that carlton danced to on fresh prince.
@hortense: Whenever something good happens to me and I have a good friend or colleague nearby, I insist on grabbing them and doing the Myposian Dance of Joy.
Shotrock
@Samanthrax: Win. Zach Attack for Grammy.
acrobatic rabbit
@Khrushchev: THE ANSWER IS HOME.....It's the one place that you'll find:
@BellaTricks: A somewhat serious gripe: Why did they list the male children before the female children? It went Matt, Simon, Mary, Lucy, Ruthie. That's not alphabetical, that's not chronological, that's f'd up!
They are doing a traditional maori greating/dance on the road rules openner. It's nice of them not to laugh, and make fun of it. You know, so as not to make fun of a group of people.
@maneki neko: hate to disagree, but i do~ I love REAL tv intros, memorable ones.
happysquid
I would like this opportunity to point out that I was not allowed to watch Full House or Family Matters as a pre-teen becuase my parents said they were TOO AMERICAN! And too cheesy! I wasn't allowed to watch anything that ended with a hug and a major chord and the audience sighing "awwwwww".
(I am from Australia- they were on TV in vaguely the same early nineties era)
@hortense: I had completely forgotten the grocery-carryout aspect of this opening theme. You hardly ever see little kids in artfully non-matching clothes carrying groceries for tips anymore.
@Khrushchev: The answer is hooooooooooooooome, that's the one place that you'll find..."
"Georgia on My Mind"--what a wonderful song.
I also love the intro to "Who's The Boss," mainly because they drive out from NY to Fairfield, CT and I'm from the area, so I get the fuzzies when I see the fall foliage and the references to Fairfield County.
Vivi21
@femputer: I agree, but it was amazing to hear the enthusiastic singalong of that theme when the band (Betty?) played at the Gay Pride Parade here in SF's Civic Center.
otherginger
@mbot in ... Hushed Rapings: Zoobilee Zoo = THE AMAZING
happysquid
I've always loved the "Littlest Hobo" theme song, despite my fear of German Shepherds.
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Small Wonder FTW
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@hortense: Amazing. I want my life recapped in a 1 minute TV show opener.
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: Me, too! Well, I didn't pretend to be her. But I thought she was a great dancer! :-)
blades31
Another British show.
Grange Hill. Set in a high school in East London.
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cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: I loved the show and the intro as well. I coveted that black and white dress. Yes, when I was 9 or something!
I actually always thought Friends had a cheesy opening, especially the whole dancing with umbrellas in a fountain part.
#4: Not a lot of the MTV audience would get the Tongan Wardance (also New Zeland rugby) reference:
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mizprickers
I can't watch your videos so I don't know if someone has already posted this, but all I'm gonna say is "Surf dudes with attitudes. Kinda groovy! Laid-back moods."
@hortense: Hell. Yes. Kids Incorporated would have kicked the Mickey Mouse Club's ass in a dark alley.
Oh "Passions", how I miss your plotlines involving hooking up on the downlow, Satan, serial killers who are literally half man and half woman, strange interludes involving Princess Diana, and beautiful lesbian tennis players.
@hortense: I was singing along with this (in my head, I AM at work after all) and I still remember EVERY SINGLE WORD. what is wrong with me? that brainspace could be put to much more effective use.
mynamebackwards
They don't make opening credits like they used to. And with this post, we can probably all agree that this is a good thing.
@Plum-Pie: Don't forget the floppy hats with a big flower!
cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
@BellaTricks: Where do you goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
when the world don't treat you right?
My god, I still know the lyrics to Zoobilee Zoo. Frightening!!
I can remember the exact moment when I realized I was too grown up to enjoy "Full House" anymore. It was the episode where Michelle was challenging Danny's notion that she was still a baby and climbed on top of the school backstop to retrieve a ball. The slight danger! The suspenseful music! The cheese factor!
West Philadelphia, born and raised, on the playground is where I spent most of my days... sorry, but when I was watching Blossom it was always on right before (or after?) the Fresh Prince. The two will forever be entwined in my head, like M.A.S.H. and the annual televised showing of The Wizard of Oz.
Uncommon Whore
@EsmereldaFitzmonster: Or, you know, before my adult-type job.
Zoobilee Zoo! I forgot all about you! And Talkatoo Cockatoo, and Van Go Lion... Oh MAN!
It is flashback week for me - yesterday I spent a good chunk of the day google image searching for Pillow People, in particular Sweet Dreams.
Oh, 80's.
Everybody look around, hear the sound:
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Oh my god-- Zoobilee Zoo! Visceral memories... flooding back...
This is from one of my favourite British shows ever. The Goodies.
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cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: My sister and I used to sing along!
The sun is gonna shoooooorely shine!
What about Hang Time? Working together? Hang Time? Putting it on the line? Hang time? Something forever? Me and my friends at Hang Time?
What, no Seventh Heaven??
@Samanthrax: Whoever thought of putting Saved by the Bell on before school was a GENIUS.
Small Wonderrrr, she's a smaaaaall wonder! That gets my vote for fave song!
schweppes
Tracie, were you being blind, or just a little unkind, when you neglected to post this:
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Don't know. Seems you can't be sure of anything anymore, really.
The Real World/Road Rules Challenge--big WTF moment for me.
CurtCole
Re: #4
They should be mocked. It's utterly cringe-inducing. And that one blushy-faced guy gets so into it - Oh God. Kimberly is the only one that visibly is like, "Wtf are we doing."
VegetableServing
zoobelie zoo FTW! Okay, but seriously, # 11 should be that damn obnoxious "L Word" intro. "Girls in tight dresses...Laughing Living Loving..." etc. It makes me cringe every time.
I loved the Blossom opening! I used to pretend I was her, camcorder recording dancing and everything.
Yes I was a weird child. What of it?
cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
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THE WORST! But also kind of the best.
What, no Saved By the Bell AKA my morning ritual, monday - friday? Come on, now.
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@Heydiddler: Sabbath Lily Hawks: Dude, it is like a bad acid trip.
I still love the "Passions" song, it just makes me happy... the show however.. after Timmy died I never watched again.. one cute, but living doll, ok... multiples? not so much
Pieces of Pi... delicious pi....
@SO I HERD U LIEK MUDKIPZ (formerly Shamrockette): Rugrats was great too! They are still painted on the side of a building here in LA along with the Real Monsters!
@[www.zimbio.com]
@haguenite: Holy shit! Flying doctors!!! Childhood memories. My Mum LOVED this show.
cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
Ya'll are trying to make me drink an entire case of champagne when I get home, aren't ya?
(Was going to happen anyway, but it's nice to blame someone other than myself for a change.)
@megnificent:
ah, young blake soper makes my heart swoon.
My husband and I sometimes do our "opening credit face with cheesy silent laughter" a la Full House. It cheers you up no matter what, guaranteed.
thecameralovesyou
@Jello Mix inspired Little Chocolate Donuts, No. 5: OH MY GOD! I thought my sister and I were the only people who had ever watched this show!!
We used to watch it after school when we were like... 8 and 10. We got about 2% of the jokes but for some reason we adored it.
@schweppes: OMG! That is most definitely the best worst opening.
freya_kahlo
@southernbelle: Yes!
@Uncle_Billy_Slumming: THIS is my favorite...the story, the song, Tom Hanks in drag. What's not to love.
WashingMyHair
@hortense: Thanks to that beautiful intro, I thought it was "_____ or Burst" in real life until LAW school.
schweppes
@Fridge Hussy : Emissary of Hell: I still know the words to Ducktales! I really don't remember the show either, so weird.
@Khrushchev: CALIFORNIA DREEAAMMMMSSS!!!
And I'll be laying here in the sun... Until my dreams are DOOOONNNNNNEEEEE!!!
@PilgrimSoul: I used to watch TGIF, too. If we didn't have a swim meet the next morning, my parents even let us stay up to watch Mr. Belvedere at 9:30. Good times.
@thatonegirlsays: To quote Saint Angie Jo, "I'm so in love with you right now." I loved, loved The Adventures of Pete and Pete so much!
honeydooo
@SkipToMyLou: Your parents were wise.
BitchyD
Zoobilee Zoo scared the crap out of me. That green bird lady, especially!! I always loved the Polka-Dot Door, myself.
@twinkette: Hahaha, that version actually fits well with the tune. I'd love someone forever who could compose the Sound of Music/L Word crossover song.
andonthatnote
The Real World/Road Rules Challenge opening doesn't bother me so much since they're doing a haka and they're in New Zealand. I give them props for pulling it off.
Nikkikkippi
When I was about five my sister tried to help me with some of the "big" words to the Full House theme song. Some how I ended up thinking that "predictibility" was "delictibility." Seventeen years later she corrected me. I spent seventeen years of my life trying to figure out what happened to delictibility because I genuinely didn't know.
PrincessConsuela
@femputer: I think i actually had to mute and fast-forward that scene, because I was damned annoyed with the use of Betty.
LOL at the Designing Women opener. I love how Jan Hooks gives this cheesy pose and smile like someone is taking her picture for the high school year book. Then Meshach Taylor just looks like oh god can I look up now? and then gives this really uncomfortable looking smile. I can't stop watching and laughing.
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: Dude, I guess that's why I am loving all your postings. Grange Hill? Parker Lewis? Clearly we were into the same TV at the same time.
@AuntieEm (robots from the year 2000 > zombies): But, but, but... YCDTOTV was Canadian! And so awesome! If you tell me you weren't allowed to watch Degrassi (original flavour) I will die of sad.
Pretty much any cartoon from the '80s and early '90s is insane (C.O.P.S. had sweet opening AND closing credits), but these two stand out:
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Bucky effing O'Hare! He goes where no ordinary rabbit would dare!
And:
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@hortense: Guessing my 2 Dads wouldn't fly these days..
@hatepaperdoll: Aww. I friended you for this one!
@cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.: I love The Goodies! Bill!
@maneki neko: I have all three seasons of pete and pete on dvd, and I am impatiently waiting for my kids to get old enough to appreciate it. I LOVED this show as a kid. It's one of the few shows that are still just as good now as they where when I was a kid.
@hortense: wesley jonathan was wayyy too cute! he hasn't stopped playing teenagers though, even though he's like 30. remember What I Like About You with Amanda Bynes?
@hortense: I remember it! That was the one at the boarding school, right? I think it was only on one season.
southernbelle
@hortense: My friends and I will sing it during class breaks and everyone will get annoyed with us. And then we throw paper planes at one another. and people who thought they couldn't hate us even more suddenly find out they can!
@Katxyz:
Oops, not the Wonder Years. I meant Boy meets World. The Wonder Years credits are pretty decent.
Katxyz
Knight Rider!!!
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cuteasabutton is cynical and sarcastical.
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*sighs dreamily*
This was my Saturday morning ritual for an embarassingly long time.
brinkswomanship