Teresa Palmer Struck Down By Severe Case Of Facebook Oversharing

You all remember Teresa Palmer, right? I am fairly sure she’s an Australian actress of some description, although for the life of me I cannot think of a single role she’s played (this may be due to a case of post Golden Plains brain). The only thing I know about her for sure is that she briefly won the heart of Russell Brand before losing the heart of Russell Brand. And sandwiching the unsuccessful Russell Brand experience appears to be Topher Grace, who we discovered was “just good friends” with Teresa back in July of 2007, and who now appears to be the goddamn love of her life.

How do we know this? How does anyone know anything any more these days? FACEBOOK.

Teresa Palmer may play coy on her Hollywood boyfriend Topher Grace in interviews, but she’s been unable to resist showing her love for him on Facebook.

The Bedtime Stories star, who has taken Grace to visit her native Adelaide, described him as “everything I could ask for”.

“He’s the most genuine person I know — giving and kind, talented and smart, loving and honest,” Palmer blogged.

If that turned up in my friend feed, I would be looking frantically for the button to click which says “Jess McGuire vomited at this“. Because I am a horrible, bitter woman.

Oh, and by the way… Teresa works hard, and she plays hard….

She also suggested there was a darker side to her squeaky-clean reputation.

“I have a habit of having parties that somehow get out of control and they usually take place in abandoned houses,” she wrote.

You know the Global Financial Crisis™ is really affecting people around the world from all walks of life when Hollywood starlets are forced to party in dingy squats. What next – no more cocaine? No more anal bleaching? WHEN WILL IT END?!

MORE: Teresa Palmer talks up love for Topher Grace on Facebook