Penelope Cruz Isn’t Looking Forward To Valentines Day
Oh wow – Penelope Cruz and yours truly have something in common! You see, we both know Valentines Day will only lead to disappointment for us because it was created by people who suck cock in hell!
Penelope Cruz has never received a Valentine’s Day card. The actress – who doesn’t like talking about her private life – has always been left disaspointed on the romantic day. She said: “I do not like talking about love. It is too revealing. But I have had so much love in my life, and I am always open to it. Valentine’s Day cards means nothing to me. I have never sent one – and never had one.
Actually, I suppose that’s less her saying Valentines Day will leave her bitterly disappointed, and more her saying that every day of her life is one glorious romantic experience after another. So I suppose what I’m really trying to say here is that Penelope Cruz sucks cock in hell too. No surprise, really.
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Comments
Hey Jess,
Why don’t you give us a postal address and maybe we (the fans) can turn your weekend around? That way you can spend Sunday writing Valentines back to us all and a whole heap of people can pop their V-day cherries together.
ED: Arf! That’s a very nice idea, although I am notoriously terrible with correspondence at the best of time, let alone when it’s me versus up to three people by hand. But I am always contactable c/o RRR’s mailing address for gifts and things that won’t make the Baby Jesus cry when I open them (ie. GWYNETH’S HEAD IN A BOX).
This is kind of a dumb question, but what is ‘your mother sucks cocks in hell’ from? It’s really bugging me. Don’t worry about the Valentine’s thing, at least it’s not as crassly religious as some of the other ‘Buy stuff’ days.