‘Lost’ Smoke Monster Returns To Administer Deadly Valentine’s Day Hug

The return of Ol’ Smokey on Lost answered one of the drama’s many questions (at least for us): What exactly is the Monster? Guilty of loving too much, that’s what!

Unglimpsed since a brief cameo last season (and inconsolable now that its partner in smoky crime, Katherine Heigl, is leaving ABC), the monster bounded out of the jungle to love up on all the surprisingly hot Frenchies in Rousseau’s science expedition. Sadly, after an unrequited embrace with Nadine went awry, the monster switch-hit (they’re French, so it’s OK) and went after Cam Gigandet clone Montand, dragging him to its secret lair to eat popcorn and watch the first season of Mad Men on DVD. Like all romantic pairings on Lost, this innocent plan ended in shouts, tears, and dismemberment. Happy Valentine’s Day! [ABC]