Thursday, February 19, 2009
Flotsam & Jetsam
3:56PM Jess McGuire | Dear Beloved Dudes and Bitches,
Tomorrow morning I am hopping on a flight to Adelaide. Why? Oh, various reasons. Bit of this, a bit of that…
And since my expertise as a merch / door bitch has been well documented by the mainstream media (well, once), I have agreed to relive my glory years and stand behind the merch table at the Frente reunion show on Saturday night at the Famous Spiegeltent and work my magic. If you’re at the show, do come and say hi. And buy some shit, or I’ll probably cop a beating. Angie Hart is small, but surprisingly strong.
Perhaps I will end up with an eye opening “behind the scenes” report on the Frentelaide Spectacular™ for your reading pleasure next week? It seems more likely I’ll end up with a hangover, though.
Anyway. I will still write nonsense for y’all tomorrow, but only if I can find a cheap internet cafe in the city. Internet cafes still exist in this age of Wi-Fi, don’t they?
If you see a confused looking girl in a RocKwiz tshirt wandering the streets looking lost and hungry, it’s probably me. Be kind, Adelaidians. And thanks for the advice the other week! I think the general consensus was that I should drink beer. Can do, kids!
x More »
Defamer Australia Versus Adelaide
3:56PM Jess McGuire | Dear Beloved Dudes and Bitches,
Tomorrow morning I am hopping on a flight to Adelaide. Why? Oh, various reasons. Bit of this, a bit of that…
And since my expertise as a merch / door bitch has been well documented by the mainstream media (well, once), I have agreed to relive my glory years and stand behind the merch table at the Frente reunion show on Saturday night at the Famous Spiegeltent and work my magic. If you’re at the show, do come and say hi. And buy some shit, or I’ll probably cop a beating. Angie Hart is small, but surprisingly strong.
Perhaps I will end up with an eye opening “behind the scenes” report on the Frentelaide Spectacular™ for your reading pleasure next week? It seems more likely I’ll end up with a hangover, though.
Anyway. I will still write nonsense for y’all tomorrow, but only if I can find a cheap internet cafe in the city. Internet cafes still exist in this age of Wi-Fi, don’t they?
If you see a confused looking girl in a RocKwiz tshirt wandering the streets looking lost and hungry, it’s probably me. Be kind, Adelaidians. And thanks for the advice the other week! I think the general consensus was that I should drink beer. Can do, kids!
x More » 
Flotsam & Jetsam
2:55PM Jess McGuire | This is, frankly, a horrifying story. Even Your Editor – a lady born without bits “down there” (< -- PAST LOVERS WILL BE RELIEVED TO HEAR, ETC) - had to cross my legs whilst reading it.
A man whose penis met an ill fate with a grinder in Brisbane’s north this afternoon has been rushed to hospital. It is understood the 23-year-old was working in Northgate when he was injured just after 2pm. A Department of Emergency Services spokeswoman could not identify the type of grinder that had injured the man or detail how he came in contact with the device.
The following sentence made me feel particularly uneasy.
Although the extent of his injuries is not known, paramedics who treated the man at the scene were able to stem the bleeding.
For some reason, I winced when I saw the word ’stem’.
Poor Grinderman :(
MORE: Man’s penis injured in grinder accident More »
‘Ouch’ Isn’t Quite Going To Cut It, So To Speak.
2:55PM Jess McGuire | This is, frankly, a horrifying story. Even Your Editor – a lady born without bits “down there” (< -- PAST LOVERS WILL BE RELIEVED TO HEAR, ETC) - had to cross my legs whilst reading it.
A man whose penis met an ill fate with a grinder in Brisbane’s north this afternoon has been rushed to hospital. It is understood the 23-year-old was working in Northgate when he was injured just after 2pm. A Department of Emergency Services spokeswoman could not identify the type of grinder that had injured the man or detail how he came in contact with the device.
The following sentence made me feel particularly uneasy.
Although the extent of his injuries is not known, paramedics who treated the man at the scene were able to stem the bleeding.
For some reason, I winced when I saw the word ’stem’.
Poor Grinderman :(
MORE: Man’s penis injured in grinder accident More »
Flotsam & Jetsam
1:53PM Jess McGuire | When the following video first started playing, I thought “My god, this is shitful.”
And then, about five seconds into it (pardon my mental slowness, I’ve had four hours sleep in the past forty hours, sook sook etc) the penny dropped. And I totally roared with laughter.
Person Who Didn’t Actually Use A Proper Name So I Shall Just Refer To Them As Rip Rip Woodchip? Thank you. That was the most perfect YouTube Clip Of The Day you could have sent me on this insanely weird Thursday. You rule.
THE REST OF YOU – WHAT ARE YOU DOING? SEND ME STUFF!
TIPS at DEFAMER.COM.AU More »
YouTube Clip Of The Day
1:53PM Jess McGuire | When the following video first started playing, I thought “My god, this is shitful.”
And then, about five seconds into it (pardon my mental slowness, I’ve had four hours sleep in the past forty hours, sook sook etc) the penny dropped. And I totally roared with laughter.
Person Who Didn’t Actually Use A Proper Name So I Shall Just Refer To Them As Rip Rip Woodchip? Thank you. That was the most perfect YouTube Clip Of The Day you could have sent me on this insanely weird Thursday. You rule.
THE REST OF YOU – WHAT ARE YOU DOING? SEND ME STUFF!
TIPS at DEFAMER.COM.AU More »
Flotsam & Jetsam
1:20PM Jess McGuire | Those brilliant minds over at RolledEdge have once again uncovered some interweb gold for us all. This time, it’s a website where animated bunnies re-enact your favourite movies in 30 seconds. No, really.
Explains RolledEdge -
No Country For Old Men, for example, goes from being a harrowing tale of drugs, money and extreme stalking to a cutesy tale of a moustached rabbit getting wacked. It’s the perfect tool for Gen Y, or anyone else who gets bored with more than half a minute of the same thing.
I GET BORED IN WAY LESS THAN THIR
MORE:
Bunny Flicks (RolledEdge)
No Country For Old Men In 30 Seconds With Bunnies More »
No Country For Old Bunnies
1:20PM Jess McGuire | Those brilliant minds over at RolledEdge have once again uncovered some interweb gold for us all. This time, it’s a website where animated bunnies re-enact your favourite movies in 30 seconds. No, really.
Explains RolledEdge -
No Country For Old Men, for example, goes from being a harrowing tale of drugs, money and extreme stalking to a cutesy tale of a moustached rabbit getting wacked. It’s the perfect tool for Gen Y, or anyone else who gets bored with more than half a minute of the same thing.
I GET BORED IN WAY LESS THAN THIR
MORE:
Bunny Flicks (RolledEdge)
No Country For Old Men In 30 Seconds With Bunnies More »
Online
11:55AM Jess McGuire | Web designer lads and ladettes! Would you like to work for our kindly, attractive daddy company Allure Media? It’s your lucky day!
Our brother site Kotaku AU put it best:
We’re looking for a part-time web designer to do all that clever design stuff that us editors have no idea about. Photoshop, Flash, HTML and CSS skills are vital. If that sounds like you, check out the ad on Seek.
So why don’t you do exactly what gaming god David Wildgoose suggests and see this very ad for more details? There you go. See you at the Christmas drinks! More »
Psssst! Want To Help Defamer Australia Look Our Webby Best?
11:55AM Jess McGuire | Web designer lads and ladettes! Would you like to work for our kindly, attractive daddy company Allure Media? It’s your lucky day!
Our brother site Kotaku AU put it best:
We’re looking for a part-time web designer to do all that clever design stuff that us editors have no idea about. Photoshop, Flash, HTML and CSS skills are vital. If that sounds like you, check out the ad on Seek.
So why don’t you do exactly what gaming god David Wildgoose suggests and see this very ad for more details? There you go. See you at the Christmas drinks! More »
People
10:38AM Jess McGuire | Yet another reason to loathe the cricket as far as I’m concerned – it’s standing in the way of Lara Bingle finally saying ‘I DO!’ to champion sportsman Michael Clarke. Actually, wait… I don’t care. Still, let’s find out more!
Bride-to-be Lara Bingle can not be happy with the news that she may have to put her wedding plans on hold until next year to accommodate her fiancé Michael Clarke’s mammoth cricket schedule.
Yesterday Confidential received word that the high profile couple had finally – after a 10 month engagement – set a wedding date.
Of course, Confidential had to go out of it’s way to shatter the dreams of young idiot lovers. More »
Bingle’N'Pup Nuptials Delayed By The Goddamn Cricket
10:38AM Jess McGuire | Yet another reason to loathe the cricket as far as I’m concerned – it’s standing in the way of Lara Bingle finally saying ‘I DO!’ to champion sportsman Michael Clarke. Actually, wait… I don’t care. Still, let’s find out more!
Bride-to-be Lara Bingle can not be happy with the news that she may have to put her wedding plans on hold until next year to accommodate her fiancé Michael Clarke’s mammoth cricket schedule.
Yesterday Confidential received word that the high profile couple had finally – after a 10 month engagement – set a wedding date.
Of course, Confidential had to go out of it’s way to shatter the dreams of young idiot lovers. More »
Small Screen
9:38AM Jess McGuire | Bad news for the folks behind the cooking show ‘Fresh’ – it’s been axed.
The eight-year-old program, currently hosted by chef Pete Evans, lost its sponsorship and a new one hasn’t been found. “Sadly, it is a victim of the current economic climate, with advertisers tightening their budgets,” the network told TV editor Erin McWhirter.
And you know who’s come out a winner in this situation? Kerri-Anne Kennerley!
The cheapest option was to extend the two-hour Mornings With Kerri-Anne to 11.30am each day, with the morning news pushed into Fresh’s slot. Hey presto – jobs lost and a TV gap filled.
Kerri-Anne has piped up… More »
It Seems The Current Economic Climate Is Working In Kerri-Anne Kennerley’s Favour
9:38AM Jess McGuire | Bad news for the folks behind the cooking show ‘Fresh’ – it’s been axed.
The eight-year-old program, currently hosted by chef Pete Evans, lost its sponsorship and a new one hasn’t been found. “Sadly, it is a victim of the current economic climate, with advertisers tightening their budgets,” the network told TV editor Erin McWhirter.
And you know who’s come out a winner in this situation? Kerri-Anne Kennerley!
The cheapest option was to extend the two-hour Mornings With Kerri-Anne to 11.30am each day, with the morning news pushed into Fresh’s slot. Hey presto – jobs lost and a TV gap filled.
Kerri-Anne has piped up… More »
Music
8:25AM Jess McGuire | I honestly believe that the last televised talent contest I really and truly lost my heart to was the hilariously awful/amazing Rock Star: INXS. It would appear all I need in order to be satisfied televisually is Dave Navarro swaying around in leather pants, Garry Gary Beers being consistently awesome, and the memory of Michael Hutchence being assaulted on a weekly basis by a cast of would be rockers who include a dude who used to appear on Australian children’s show The Ferals. I think this may make me a bad person, but I don’t care.
Moving on. Viewers who followed the program a few years back would be well aware that the winner of the contest to take over the role of frontman of INXS was a cocky chap named J.D Fortune. His KILLER ROCK TRACK ‘Pretty Vegas’ had the band being played on commercial radio once more (and not in the “here’s a walk down memory lane” kind of way) and for a while, the future looked bright for J.D Fortune.
A couple of years on, it has all come crashing down for him in spectacular fashion. Living in a car! Battling cocaine addiction! Fired in an airport!
The winner of the 2005 reality show Rockster:INXS has been fired by the band, leaving him broke and living out of his pickup truck.
More »
J.D Not So Fortunate After Being Fired From INXS
8:25AM Jess McGuire | I honestly believe that the last televised talent contest I really and truly lost my heart to was the hilariously awful/amazing Rock Star: INXS. It would appear all I need in order to be satisfied televisually is Dave Navarro swaying around in leather pants, Garry Gary Beers being consistently awesome, and the memory of Michael Hutchence being assaulted on a weekly basis by a cast of would be rockers who include a dude who used to appear on Australian children’s show The Ferals. I think this may make me a bad person, but I don’t care.
Moving on. Viewers who followed the program a few years back would be well aware that the winner of the contest to take over the role of frontman of INXS was a cocky chap named J.D Fortune. His KILLER ROCK TRACK ‘Pretty Vegas’ had the band being played on commercial radio once more (and not in the “here’s a walk down memory lane” kind of way) and for a while, the future looked bright for J.D Fortune.
A couple of years on, it has all come crashing down for him in spectacular fashion. Living in a car! Battling cocaine addiction! Fired in an airport!
The winner of the 2005 reality show Rockster:INXS has been fired by the band, leaving him broke and living out of his pickup truck.
More »
Print
7:52AM Jess McGuire | I really liked Marieke Hardy’s opinion piece in The Age about the media frenzy regarding the recent Victorian bushfires, so I urge you to go and read it. Here’s a taste.
…when you’re on your fourth or fifth day of coverage and you see a television journalist standing next to a car, hard up for content and prodding a grey-faced driver with the question: “Guess you’ve lost a lot of friends up on that mountain … must feel pretty bad … how would you describe how that feels exactly?” that you start to wonder whether you’re beginning to be party to preying upon the raw grief of others and that perhaps it’s time to put the goddamned cameras away.
I agree with her sentiments wholeheartedly – read the whole article here. That is all.
MORE: Time for media circus to fold up its tents More »
This Is Very Good.
7:52AM Jess McGuire | I really liked Marieke Hardy’s opinion piece in The Age about the media frenzy regarding the recent Victorian bushfires, so I urge you to go and read it. Here’s a taste.
…when you’re on your fourth or fifth day of coverage and you see a television journalist standing next to a car, hard up for content and prodding a grey-faced driver with the question: “Guess you’ve lost a lot of friends up on that mountain … must feel pretty bad … how would you describe how that feels exactly?” that you start to wonder whether you’re beginning to be party to preying upon the raw grief of others and that perhaps it’s time to put the goddamned cameras away.
I agree with her sentiments wholeheartedly – read the whole article here. That is all.
MORE: Time for media circus to fold up its tents More » 
