Hacks On, Hacks Off

· As per our suggestion, Jackie Chan is negotiating to play the Mr. Miyagi mentoring role in the The Karate Kid remake with Jaden “Will’s Brat” Smith. [THR]

· CBS’s Nina Tassler told TCA she no apologies for her networks all-procedurals, all-the-time policy. About NBC’s Jay Leno strip: “It’s a coveted time period. The creative community was, quite frankly, shocked when they first heard about it. There’s so much top-tier talent that vie for that time period every year.” No offence, though, Jay. You’re way up there. Fourth- or fifth-tier at least. [Variety]
· Jennifer Hudson will reemerge cautiously into the performing spotlight with a low-key, acoustic performance at a coffee house called the MOTHERFUCKING SUPER BOWL. She’s singing the national anthem—we suggest you turn the volume down for “land of the free,” lest the river of toxic plasma that pours out of your shattered flat-screen incinerate your nacho-munching guests. [Variety]
· CBS Films will produce its first feature, a medical drama pairing blockbuster adventurists Brendan Fraser and Harrison Ford. Fraser plays a father who turns to Ford to cure his children’s rare genetic disorder. Unfortunately, the search for the cure doesn’t involve shrinking themselves down to enter the kids’ bloodstreams in a tiny innerspace vessel, battling 3-D ants along the way. [THR]
· Paramount will produce an adaptation of Daemon, a tech-thriller bestseller about what happens when PayPal runs amok and starts banging your wife and hanging out with your best friends. (We could be wrong about that—it’s just what we gathered from staring at the cover art.) [THR]