Tragedy At The Playboy Mansion As Hugh Hefner Catches Lower Lip On New Girlfriend’s Braces

Photo evidence has surfaced online (and since been removed) of a recent Hugh Hefner-hosted Playboy Mansion soirée: the always enchanting Mid-Autumn’s Dress Like You Just Raided the Hustler Store With Your Grandfather’s Black Card Party. And lest you worry that his small army of pneumatically enhanced arm candy serve purely decorative and/or walk-stabilising functions, we invite you to scrutinise the photo above. In it, Hefner engages in a vigorous oral exploration of one of his guests (one of his bar-brawling twins?) while nearly smothering another couch-dweller to death (her sister?) in the process. According to the Oh No They Didn’t contributor, whose friend is a Playboy model and took the photos, Hefner “‘just grabs girls faces and kisses them, he’s such a bitch’ and ‘he really is an old pervert’ and that he smokes pot all the time and that ‘all his girlfriends really do fuck him.’” Go, Hef!

After the jump is a group photo, in which one model’s attempt at using her cleavage as a human billboard doesn’t go quite as planned. Still, we encourage all forms of out-of-the-bustier commerce during these trying times.

• GROSS OLD MAN POST [Oh No They Didn't]