BLIND ITEM! Which Australian Celebrity Sent This Furious Email To A Newspaper Columnist?
It’s never nice hearing that someone doesn’t like you. Personally, it tears me up inside when I’m told I’m a useless, talentless fool whose existence does nothing to better the world, which leads me to wonder why I even bother going to visit my grandmother if she’s just going to get drunk and berate me*.
Well, there’s someone else out there in Australian Showbiz Land who doesn’t enjoy being made fun of, and after reading a newspaper column where they were labelled an “insufferable twit”, they sent a thoroughly cutting email to the columnist in question.
The correspondence starts with a polite “Hi” (a lady never forgets her manners, even if she’s about to accuse a foe of sticking vegetables up their clacker) but quickly launches into something more… something glorious. Are you ready to revel in three sentences of conservative woman fury?
Hi, I am not sure what I have done to justify such nasty comments in your rarely read publication. I can only assume that you are large, unattractive and single? Poor darling, there’s a good girl, put the cucumber away, cross your cankles and keep wishing on a star for a life far less ordinary than yours …
While I can’t tell you the name of the Fairfax columnist who received this delicious collection of insults in their inbox, nor the television presenter who penned it, it’s worth marvelling at regardless simply because of how succinctly the writer has managed to capture their rage.
Also? Given who [REDACTED]’s husband is, I think it’d probably be better to be a “large, unattractive and single” woman who doesn’t let [REDACTED] place himself inside her. I mean, for god’s sake – it’s [REDACTED]’s sloppy seconds!
- Next Post: Tina Fey Suggests That Defamer Has Some Issues »
- « Previous Post: YouTube Clip Of The Day
Comments
My guess – Lisa Oldfield … David Oldfield being Pauline Hanson’s sloppy seconds.
Absolutely Lisa Oldfield and aimed at the lovely Ms Hardy and her Green Guide Gold.
Haha if you type ‘insufferable twit’ and newspaper into Google it brings up the story about Lisa Oldfield. You should reclassify this as a Not-so-blind Item!
ED: What is this Google you speak of? I have no idea what you’re talking about. This item is so blind, it has its own guide dog! Also, more writers should use the term ‘insufferable twit’.
I didn’t even think of google, I was going to go to factiva- newspaper records back to the 1980s!
Don’t suppose there’s any chance of seeing Ms Hardy’s retort in next week’s Green Guide? I want enough attention bought to Lisa Oldfield so she becomes a contender for It Takes Two 09. DWTS would again just feel like Pauline’s sloppy seconds.
yep, I recognised the ‘insufferable twit’ automatically. i happen to like ms hardy
And when you put ‘Lisa Oldfield’ into google you get her profile from Channel 9 which includes this essential bit of info:
“Discovering her intellectual and scholastic aptitude later in her teens, she went on to graduate from high school with a HSC result of 98.65.”
Wow, it’s great to know she got good marks in high school as well as being small, attractive and married to a bigot. She must be ace and never needs to have sex with a cucumber…(this was what she was implying, right? That if you don’t like her you have sex with vegetables?) What a genius.