Welcome To The New Cold War: Your Ciccone/Ritchie Divorce Round-Up

Another day, another approximately 12,000 steaming new dishes laid out in the ongoing Madonna/Guy Ritchie divörgåsbord, a sumptuous schadenfreude buffet. We highlight a few, for your gustatory enjoyment:

· Madonna’s inner-circle (a 450-person-strong army consisting of stylists, trainers, hair & makeup people, plastic surgeons, background singers and Voguers, and one horseback riding instructor) claim Ritchie’s nickname is “Material Guy,” for his notorious gold-digging tendencies. [The Sun]
· A-Rod is shopping around for real estate near Madonna’s apartment on the Upper West Side, and is closing in on an $80 million, 5,200-square-foot penthouse in the new Robert A.M. Stern condo going up there. [NY Daily News]
· In the NYC-London battle royale for Madonna’s presence, look for New York to win. She accepted a life in London for Ritchie’s sake. That means a Brooklyn accent should return within the year! Yay! [People]
· Unless of course you believe the story that says her heart is in London, and she could never leave. [Daily Mail]
· Ritchie reportedly infuriating Madonna when she learned he humiliated daughter Lourdes by pointing out her budding breasts and saying she’s “becoming a woman” over lunch. [The Sun]
· Ritchie claims he’s being spied upon by Madonna’s camp, saying, “this is a divorce, not the Cold War.” [The Sun]
· African demi-orphan David Banda’s biological father is apparently listening in to the developments on his battery-operated Aiwa radio in disgust, telling The Sun: “I am still a poor farmer with nothing to offer, but maybe he’d be better off back with us. This woman, Madonna, told me herself that David was beautiful and made her happy and she promised to take care of him. Now I see him in a big bewildering crowd in the street with people pushing and shoving, and many cameras around, and without a mother and father to hold his hand. I’m feeling bad for him.” [Newsday]