Roosevelt Hotel Fights Back: ‘Our Pools Are 100% Corpseless’

Our noting of this morning’s Page Six story about a death in the Roosevelt Hotel’s pool and an alleged failure to drain its water—resulting in Lindsay Lohan’s first direct brush with death since the approximately 75,000 others she experienced before entering Cirque Lodge—elicited a response from a concerned hotel spokesflack, who wanted to set the record straight on exactly what transpired. It’s after the jump:

Last week there was a death surrounding the property of the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel. Out of respect for the family, Thompson has not released the name of the deceased nor any private details.

Unfortunately this morning inaccurate reports regarding the incident occurred. The death in fact was not pronounced at the Hollywood Roosevelt, it was pronounced away from the hotel, only after the individual was taken away by emergency medical staff in an ambulance.

We can assure guests who have used the pool since the incident that proper procedures were taken, and the pool was drained and cleaned once authorities completed their on-site investigation.

Thompson Hotels hope that journalists will respect the family during this time of loss and suffering, and share our deepest sympathies.

Please let me know if you have any questions.

Obviously, we feel badly about the young guy who passed away—but if we read that correctly, his death didn’t happen in the pool, and yet they drained it anyway. That to us sounds unlikely—plus it contradicts the coroner’s statement. But then, it’s not entirely out of the realm of possibility, considering we once found a blonde eyelash in a Pomegranatini at Teddy’s, and the gracious staff replaced it immediately, no questions asked.

• Previously: Lesbian Starlet Supply Tainted By Roosevelt’s Corpse-Water Pool [Defamer]